Tales from the Book, Part XC
Extra Tales this week, well, because it's my journal and I feel like it.
Seen in site support chat:
member gettign a voice on her computer saying "hi my name is chuck, i live in your computer" [sic throughout]
Tech:Do you have a tab there labeled '*ISP* Software'?
Caller:No, it came preinstalled on the computer.
All of this happened after the caller had already told me that he was using Windows XP. Apparently he'd somehow entirely forgotten, in the process of getting a new machine, how to check his webmail. Throughout the entire call he sounded exasperated at having to deal with such a moron as myself, who obviously didn't understand what he was saying:
Tech:Which browser are you using?
Caller:I go online, and I go to 'Search', and I put in my name, and it just comes up with a bunch of link that have my name in them. It doesn't give me the login screen.
Tech:Right, because you're doing a search for your name, instead of going to *isp*.com to log in. You -
Caller:*huffs* I go online and I go to 'Search' and I put in my name, and I can't log in.
Tech:Sir, you can't log in to your e-mail by doing a web search. That's just going to give you a group of links with your name in them, not the site you need.
Caller:Oh. But when I go there, I can't get in.
Tech:Yes, I understand that, and that's what we're going to look at. To get started, let's find out what browser you're using.
Caller:*more slowly this time, since the tech is clearly the one not getting it* I start on 'Search', and -
Tech:*interrupts, because sometimes you need to be a bit rude to slice through the earplugs of self-absorption* Yes, as I said, I understand that, but 'Search' isn't a browser.
Caller:*sounding more put out than ever* Well, I used to be on Windows, but now I'm on a Mac platform.
Tech:*explains he's in the wrong dep't, and gives correct number before preparing to transfer*
Caller:I'll call them later! I'm busy. I've got business out the door!
Tech:*thinking* 'OK, but you've got time to huff and puff and ignore everything I say?' *aloud* No problem, they're open 24 hours.
This guy was the inspiration for the caller category of The Repeater, though admittedly he is an extreme case. I'm fairly certain he didn't so much 'have business' as he'd just realized what a moron he'd been, and was afraid I'd tell the Mac tech he had the listening skills of an eggplant if I transferred him. Even if I could have warm transferred him, I'd never insult eggplants like that.
Before I go, here's another one from Not Always Right: Blue on the thing!
Seen in site support chat:
member gettign a voice on her computer saying "hi my name is chuck, i live in your computer" [sic throughout]
Tech:Do you have a tab there labeled '*ISP* Software'?
Caller:No, it came preinstalled on the computer.
All of this happened after the caller had already told me that he was using Windows XP. Apparently he'd somehow entirely forgotten, in the process of getting a new machine, how to check his webmail. Throughout the entire call he sounded exasperated at having to deal with such a moron as myself, who obviously didn't understand what he was saying:
Tech:Which browser are you using?
Caller:I go online, and I go to 'Search', and I put in my name, and it just comes up with a bunch of link that have my name in them. It doesn't give me the login screen.
Tech:Right, because you're doing a search for your name, instead of going to *isp*.com to log in. You -
Caller:*huffs* I go online and I go to 'Search' and I put in my name, and I can't log in.
Tech:Sir, you can't log in to your e-mail by doing a web search. That's just going to give you a group of links with your name in them, not the site you need.
Caller:Oh. But when I go there, I can't get in.
Tech:Yes, I understand that, and that's what we're going to look at. To get started, let's find out what browser you're using.
Caller:*more slowly this time, since the tech is clearly the one not getting it* I start on 'Search', and -
Tech:*interrupts, because sometimes you need to be a bit rude to slice through the earplugs of self-absorption* Yes, as I said, I understand that, but 'Search' isn't a browser.
Caller:*sounding more put out than ever* Well, I used to be on Windows, but now I'm on a Mac platform.
Tech:*explains he's in the wrong dep't, and gives correct number before preparing to transfer*
Caller:I'll call them later! I'm busy. I've got business out the door!
Tech:*thinking* 'OK, but you've got time to huff and puff and ignore everything I say?' *aloud* No problem, they're open 24 hours.
This guy was the inspiration for the caller category of The Repeater, though admittedly he is an extreme case. I'm fairly certain he didn't so much 'have business' as he'd just realized what a moron he'd been, and was afraid I'd tell the Mac tech he had the listening skills of an eggplant if I transferred him. Even if I could have warm transferred him, I'd never insult eggplants like that.
Before I go, here's another one from Not Always Right: Blue on the thing!