Right Radio
My husband has often asked me how I can stand to listen to right-wing radio talk show hosts. I've told him that I like hearing differing points of view, and that I am most interested to hear if there is rationale behind the opinions (instead of dogma such as "that's how it's always been done" or "that's what the Bible says").
That being said, there is a wide range of conservative ideology out there. Some of it does appear to come from a place of genuine concern and even compassion. However, sadly, most of what I hear when I listen to conservative talk radio seems to involve a spewing of ridicule and condescension-- if not downright venom-- toward those whose political views differ from that of the show host.
While "Dr. Laura" is not, in the strictest sense, a political commentator, those who call her for advice quickly learn (if they didn't know already) that she isn't there to share information, relate her own experiences, or in any other way treat her callers as if they are adults deserving of respectful discourse.
No sir, she is there to tell you you're wrong, you're stupid, your life experiences mean nothing, and your opinions don't matter. You've fucked up your life, and probably those of everyone around you by, in a weak moment, daring to want and seek some happiness for yourself; and the damage is now irrevocable. The best you can do is verbally roll over on your back at her feet, acknowledge that she now controls your destiny.
Here are two nauseating little vignettes from the show I listened to this afternoon as I was driving around doing errands:
Scenario 1: Caller is a middle aged woman who married for the first time, had a daughter, divorced her daughter's father, then remarried. It was never brought up what led to the divorce-- of course that wouldn't matter anyway, unless the woman was in literal, physical fear for her life, because that is the only time Dr. Laura "allows" a couple with children to get divorced-- but I digress...
Anyway, the daughter apparently grew up to be somewhat of a pain in the ass (again, no details on whether this just involves backtalk and curfew breaking, or whether little Jenny is shooting heroin and robbing banks) and was sent to live with her father in an effort to "straighten her out."
Daughter is now 16 and wants to come back and live with Mom. Stepdad does not want her living there (reasons again not supplied, and probably don't matter to the omniscient Dr. Laura), so Mom calls the show to find out what to do.
HERE is Dr. Laura's BRILLIANT solution: Since it's Mom's fault the daughter is screwed up (because she got a divorce), and since Mom should have "finished her job" (i.e. seen the child through to her 18th birthday) before remarrying, the daughter has every right to move back in with Mom.
If stepdad objects to this, Mom is to tell him he has no say in the matter and he needs to get out of the house and go live with his own mother for two years, until the daughter is 18.
The caller acted kind of shocked for a moment (any normal person would react to such a batshit insane idea by hanging up immediately and never having anything to do with Dr. Laura again) but then the brainwashing kicked back in and she kept saying, "Oh I know... you're right... you're right... I should do that..."
Eventually she hung up after Dr. Laura cooed, "I would never let any MAN stand between me and my child, honey..." but does anyone seriously think she went to her husband that night and said, "Little Jenny's moving back in so I can finish my job as a parent whether you like it or not-- and feel free to get the fuck out of the house for two years starting now."?
My point is that people know they're on the radio with a "celebrity" and they've been guilt-tripped by her and others like her all their lives into thinking their happiness means nothing, so they're not likely to challenge her. But after they hang up, I am sure most of them have a tiny voice of reason still active in the back row of their minds, and that is what stops them from actually following through with the idiotic things she recommends.
Scenario 2: A young woman calls in regarding her fiancé whom she plans to marry within a year. Even though her question has nothing to do with sex, Dr. Laura always has to run down her gamut of intrusive questions "Are you living together?" (although she more frequently phrases it, in the most disdainful tone of voice she can muster, "Are you shacking up?") "Are you sleeping with him?"
Again I am struck by sadness that so many women who call this program are such sheep-- that they don't recognize that being asked about their sexual activities when their questions for the host have nothing whatsoever to do with sex is light-years beyond rude and should be answered by a click and a dial tone-- and this young woman gamely followed along, reassuring Laura that, yes, her hymen was still gloriously intact and that the numbers on his and her utility bills did not match.
The actual question involved whether or not to move out of state after the wedding. The caller stated that her fiancé wanted to move away, the caller said she wasn't sure whether she wanted to or not. Dr. Laura asked if they were planning to start a family, and the caller said, "yes."
"It's settled, then," she replied, "you tell him that when the babies start coming you're going to need your family around you-- your mother, your aunts, your sisters... it's very important to a new mother. So if he wants to marry you, it's going to involve your staying where you are. Moving away is a deal breaker."
Like the caller in Scenario 1, this young lady kept repeating what Dr. Laura said back to herself, as if she were trying to talk herself into it. "So you want me to... tell him... I'm not moving and that's final... I need my family... for the babies... it's a dealbreaker..."
"Yes!" Dr. Laura crowed jubilantly, "yes... you tell him that. If he really cares about you.. and about the children you're going to have, he will understand."
Again, now-- do you really think that girl got right on the phone with her fiancé and said, "We stay near MY family, or the wedding's off!" Or do ya think that at some point after the celebrity glow faded from her telephone, that little voice of sanity started whispering to her that ultimatums are NOT a good way to start off what is hopefully a lifelong relationship based on mutual love and respect..?
I certainly hope so. I weep for the cowed and browbeaten women who accept this type of behavior from someone who purports to be "helping" them.
That being said, there is a wide range of conservative ideology out there. Some of it does appear to come from a place of genuine concern and even compassion. However, sadly, most of what I hear when I listen to conservative talk radio seems to involve a spewing of ridicule and condescension-- if not downright venom-- toward those whose political views differ from that of the show host.
While "Dr. Laura" is not, in the strictest sense, a political commentator, those who call her for advice quickly learn (if they didn't know already) that she isn't there to share information, relate her own experiences, or in any other way treat her callers as if they are adults deserving of respectful discourse.
No sir, she is there to tell you you're wrong, you're stupid, your life experiences mean nothing, and your opinions don't matter. You've fucked up your life, and probably those of everyone around you by, in a weak moment, daring to want and seek some happiness for yourself; and the damage is now irrevocable. The best you can do is verbally roll over on your back at her feet, acknowledge that she now controls your destiny.
Here are two nauseating little vignettes from the show I listened to this afternoon as I was driving around doing errands:
Scenario 1: Caller is a middle aged woman who married for the first time, had a daughter, divorced her daughter's father, then remarried. It was never brought up what led to the divorce-- of course that wouldn't matter anyway, unless the woman was in literal, physical fear for her life, because that is the only time Dr. Laura "allows" a couple with children to get divorced-- but I digress...
Anyway, the daughter apparently grew up to be somewhat of a pain in the ass (again, no details on whether this just involves backtalk and curfew breaking, or whether little Jenny is shooting heroin and robbing banks) and was sent to live with her father in an effort to "straighten her out."
Daughter is now 16 and wants to come back and live with Mom. Stepdad does not want her living there (reasons again not supplied, and probably don't matter to the omniscient Dr. Laura), so Mom calls the show to find out what to do.
HERE is Dr. Laura's BRILLIANT solution: Since it's Mom's fault the daughter is screwed up (because she got a divorce), and since Mom should have "finished her job" (i.e. seen the child through to her 18th birthday) before remarrying, the daughter has every right to move back in with Mom.
If stepdad objects to this, Mom is to tell him he has no say in the matter and he needs to get out of the house and go live with his own mother for two years, until the daughter is 18.
The caller acted kind of shocked for a moment (any normal person would react to such a batshit insane idea by hanging up immediately and never having anything to do with Dr. Laura again) but then the brainwashing kicked back in and she kept saying, "Oh I know... you're right... you're right... I should do that..."
Eventually she hung up after Dr. Laura cooed, "I would never let any MAN stand between me and my child, honey..." but does anyone seriously think she went to her husband that night and said, "Little Jenny's moving back in so I can finish my job as a parent whether you like it or not-- and feel free to get the fuck out of the house for two years starting now."?
My point is that people know they're on the radio with a "celebrity" and they've been guilt-tripped by her and others like her all their lives into thinking their happiness means nothing, so they're not likely to challenge her. But after they hang up, I am sure most of them have a tiny voice of reason still active in the back row of their minds, and that is what stops them from actually following through with the idiotic things she recommends.
Scenario 2: A young woman calls in regarding her fiancé whom she plans to marry within a year. Even though her question has nothing to do with sex, Dr. Laura always has to run down her gamut of intrusive questions "Are you living together?" (although she more frequently phrases it, in the most disdainful tone of voice she can muster, "Are you shacking up?") "Are you sleeping with him?"
Again I am struck by sadness that so many women who call this program are such sheep-- that they don't recognize that being asked about their sexual activities when their questions for the host have nothing whatsoever to do with sex is light-years beyond rude and should be answered by a click and a dial tone-- and this young woman gamely followed along, reassuring Laura that, yes, her hymen was still gloriously intact and that the numbers on his and her utility bills did not match.
The actual question involved whether or not to move out of state after the wedding. The caller stated that her fiancé wanted to move away, the caller said she wasn't sure whether she wanted to or not. Dr. Laura asked if they were planning to start a family, and the caller said, "yes."
"It's settled, then," she replied, "you tell him that when the babies start coming you're going to need your family around you-- your mother, your aunts, your sisters... it's very important to a new mother. So if he wants to marry you, it's going to involve your staying where you are. Moving away is a deal breaker."
Like the caller in Scenario 1, this young lady kept repeating what Dr. Laura said back to herself, as if she were trying to talk herself into it. "So you want me to... tell him... I'm not moving and that's final... I need my family... for the babies... it's a dealbreaker..."
"Yes!" Dr. Laura crowed jubilantly, "yes... you tell him that. If he really cares about you.. and about the children you're going to have, he will understand."
Again, now-- do you really think that girl got right on the phone with her fiancé and said, "We stay near MY family, or the wedding's off!" Or do ya think that at some point after the celebrity glow faded from her telephone, that little voice of sanity started whispering to her that ultimatums are NOT a good way to start off what is hopefully a lifelong relationship based on mutual love and respect..?
I certainly hope so. I weep for the cowed and browbeaten women who accept this type of behavior from someone who purports to be "helping" them.