LJ Idol // Week 18 // Jetsam
I'm taking a break from The Flyaways this week to show you something different.
This is a short, experimental stage play, and is part of something that I am seriously considering developing for Real Life Performance - therefore your feedback & criticism is even more welcome/encouraged than usual.
JETSAM
Jazz - A girl, 15.
Max - A boy, 15.
The play takes place in an abandoned school, in the very near future.
1.
Silence and darkness.
JAZZ’s voice, quiet and alone in the dark, singing a nursery rhyme. “Lavender's blue, dilly dilly, lavender's green; When I am king, dilly, dilly, you shall be queen…”
The singing continues. Then,
The lights flicker, on and then off, and then on again.
JAZZ is sitting cross-legged on the ground. She is dirty and unkempt, and still singing.
JAZZ
Who told you so, dilly, dilly, who told you so?
'Twas my own heart, dilly, dilly, that told me so.
MAX enters, equally unkempt.
MAX
Awww, bollocks.
JAZZ is startled; she jumps.
JAZZ
Eh?
MAX
I thought I was the only one.
JAZZ
Apparently not.
MAX
No.
Pause.
JAZZ
Two ain’t so bad.
We can live with that.
(pause)
Surely?
The lights flicker, off and then on again.
JAZZ
Fuck’s sake.
MAX
It’ll do that again.
The lights flicker again.
They stay off.
Darkness.
JAZZ
Arse.
2.
Silence and darkness.
Max and Jazz’s voices, mimicking newsreaders, come to us through the dark.
MAX
The government must find a way to cut the deficit...
JAZZ
...saving of twenty three point seven percent of their annual budget...
MAX
... a total saving of six-point-two billion pounds...
JAZZ
... a mountainous task...
MAX
... highly unfeasible in the modern world...
JAZZ
No.
The lights flicker.
We catch a glimpse of MAX fumbling with a box of matches.
Darkness.
He lights one. Holds it up. It burns.
Then,
MAX
Ow!
Bastard!
He drops it.
Darkness.
JAZZ
Idiot.
MAX
Fuck off.
MAX lights another match. This time, he lights a candle, which he has taken from his jacket pocket.
MAX
... a total saving of six-point-two billion pounds...
JAZZ
... a mountainous task...
MAX
...impossible...
JAZZ
No,
It’s easy.
Problem solved.
MAX
Remove 23.7% of the population.
Pause.
JAZZ
Of course not by murder.
Idiot.
Silence.
JAZZ
Hey?
MAX
Hmmm?
JAZZ
Nothing.
Silence.
3.
Silence.
The candle burns.
MAX and JAZZ again talk out to the audience.
MAX
You know, this is why we have all those statistics...
JAZZ
... Assess the portion of the country that is, overall, the most troublesome of your children...
MAX
Kick them out.
Duh.
JAZZ
Sorted.
Silence.
JAZZ
So.
MAX
So?
JAZZ
A man was found stark bollock naked in the desert, clutching a matchstick.
Why?
MAX doesn’t know.
JAZZ and MAX sit watching the candle. Time passes.
Then, Jazz begins to sing again.
JAZZ
Lavender's blue, dilly dilly, lavender's green; When I am king, dilly, dilly, you shall be queen…
MAX
Do you want to be king?
A moment.
The light flickers.
She blows out the candle.
Darkness.
JAZZ
Yeah.
I’ll be the king.