he said it this time
I was talking with him on the phone last night, and for some out of the blue reason he began to talk about where things are going. from what he told me, he has been thinking the same things I have been thinking, about breaking it off. he is mainly concerned that I don't know what I want. sitting here thinking about it now, I have my response, but last night it seemed as if he was anticipating an immediate response, even though he said he wasn't. I asked him if we really were waisting eachothers time, and even he didn't know. I am glad I said nothing then, because I did need time to clear my head, and prepare, unfortunately, the way he acts, he may just forget about the conversation, and pretend it never happened, like the last times I tried to tell him about it, but maybe since HE brought it up this time, he will take it seriously. I want to tell him, "I want you as you are. I want to always be your friend, and the one you trust. but I don't see a future for us romantically." would that be enough? he is so concerned about action, that I think he is forgetting to enjoy the time he is living at the moment. I think at this point, we are good for eachother, but there is no future there. so, is it fair to keep it going till it falls apart, or is it better to end it now? and by end, does that meen no more contact whatsoever, because that just sucks. some people can do it that way, but to take someone completely out of my life that I trust the way I trust him... just wouldn't be right for either one of us. at this point I need him more as my friend, because he does inspire good things out of me. he needs me because he has been looking for someone to trust. he wants love out of life, but the kind of love I am willing to give is only that of friendship. he does need someone else. and that is how I see it.