happyevilgenius!
kyaa~<3
Okay.
Woke up at 7 plus. Tried to clean up my table and file some of my notes, had breakfast and it was off to Ms Ving's in the nice pleasant morning, breezy and clear. Kind of fun-happy ish,a good change from the depressing constant rain weather the past few days which I'm inclined to sleep away.
Walking to Ms Ving's house is always pleasant, the area at Penang road is always quiet and breezy. When the wind blows, the trees shower yellow petals. So kena headache thanks to Maths, fortunately I'm left with the last revision paper! Leaving Ms Ving's got trapped in the midday sun. Strolled into Orchard Emerald's MOS. Here's the argument I presented Darryl with who was tempted to join me.
1. I need my caffeine fix (read a MOS milk tea + creamer ritual)
2. I AM HUNGRY
3. It's hot outside damnit, especially in the afternoons at my house. Really hot.
4. It's quiet, usually.
5. Its near Ms Ving's house.
So planted my ass from 11 plus - 4pm. Cyn came at 1plus to join me and we mugged.
NO SHIT.
We mugged.
I've finished revising the whole of the J1 H1 econs syllabus for my promo paper on Monday.
Yes, feeling very very accomplished.
So tonight I'm going to do bio:
-DNA and Genomics
-Cell Division
-Genetic Basis for Variation (<3)
Tomorrow (at Subway/MOS with the gang<33)
-Evolution
-Photosynthesis
-2 MCQ & Section B papers
Right now, I just need to stay away from the bookshelf. MUST RESIST.
So anyway.
Well, yeah was thinking a lot of Thursday. I didn't go for any of my classes. Just sat in the Library and stoned. A lot. I read This Side of Paradise and Norwegian Wood (again). I don't feel very much in school usually, just really numb. I feel nothing towards to the school and I just feel bitter and resentful. When JJ mentioned that he gets the feeling that I'm unhappy in school when he's not around.
He's right. I just throw myself at distractions to keep it away it became more apparent on Thursday. Just me, with my thoughts the entire day. I'm uncomfortable in school, and absolutely abhor/despise the AC culture. I refuse (occasionally diplomatically declining it) the absorb it, at all. Fine I'm prejudiced. And mercenary, unforgiving and harsh. Tell me what you will.
My only defense?
It's a matter of perspective.
I've officially given up on becoming an OGL (much to somebody's surprise and disappointment. I think she really wanted me to be one. Funny how Robindro mentioned that I'll make a good one too)
I still have unresolved issues and I have no intention of sowing seeds of resentment in happy!J1s especially if they are unprepared. It takes guts to hate a school, and great resolve which not everyone wants/has. Plus, I've got Art Soc to work on. Reviving it is going to take a large amount of time and effort. I have no idea how it'll be like for CCAAB (the CCA leaders camp. They are taking my weekend damnit!) At the very least, tahan. That's all.
I really wonder what makes me go to school.
It's definitely not the people.
Was so fonding reminded during one of the night studies, ever since then I totally stopped staying back.
Mon is right, we're just different
And I'm just a stubborn difficult person to know.
Curious how my classmates describe me, motherly. Who knows a trillion and one random/weird things.
Like how to use double-sided photocopying.
They don't.
I'm seriously.
maybe I should have gone CJC, it's too late to regret
Even going home sometimes isn't as pleasant as before. (other than the fact it's absolutely not conducive for studying)
It's too quiet.
Too empty.
Too big.
For me.
I miss my siblings terribly.
On to some UA-ing (useless anxiety)
I NEED TO PASS PROMOS.
I NEED TO PASS ALL MY SUBJECTS.
OMG
DIESSSS.
fuck, I'm positive all this swearing is rubbing off. And school makes me cranky. And emo. LOL
Although I'm kind of 'happy spin spin sugar high'-ish feeling.
I AM NOT MAKING ANY SENSE
Yes I'm just this confused teenager NO RLY.
Or rather, I miss IJ rooftop days. I was reminded of it when Ms Ving showed me the Secondary School rankings.
It reminds me of summer.
An endless summer
but
summertime is leaving me
you know it's leaving me
don't want to say
goodbye
PS, I <3 the piano bit in Cassis (Kie is going to fry me, she's anti-GazettE and that fanatical Kyo cosplayer I know from Provence who is currently in Sendai to watch Diru)
Does anyone have the Jin's Ha Ha rip? My sis wants. Thanks
Okay.
Woke up at 7 plus. Tried to clean up my table and file some of my notes, had breakfast and it was off to Ms Ving's in the nice pleasant morning, breezy and clear. Kind of fun-happy ish,a good change from the depressing constant rain weather the past few days which I'm inclined to sleep away.
Walking to Ms Ving's house is always pleasant, the area at Penang road is always quiet and breezy. When the wind blows, the trees shower yellow petals. So kena headache thanks to Maths, fortunately I'm left with the last revision paper! Leaving Ms Ving's got trapped in the midday sun. Strolled into Orchard Emerald's MOS. Here's the argument I presented Darryl with who was tempted to join me.
1. I need my caffeine fix (read a MOS milk tea + creamer ritual)
2. I AM HUNGRY
3. It's hot outside damnit, especially in the afternoons at my house. Really hot.
4. It's quiet, usually.
5. Its near Ms Ving's house.
So planted my ass from 11 plus - 4pm. Cyn came at 1plus to join me and we mugged.
NO SHIT.
We mugged.
I've finished revising the whole of the J1 H1 econs syllabus for my promo paper on Monday.
Yes, feeling very very accomplished.
So tonight I'm going to do bio:
-DNA and Genomics
-Cell Division
-Genetic Basis for Variation (<3)
Tomorrow (at Subway/MOS with the gang<33)
-Evolution
-Photosynthesis
-2 MCQ & Section B papers
Right now, I just need to stay away from the bookshelf. MUST RESIST.
So anyway.
Well, yeah was thinking a lot of Thursday. I didn't go for any of my classes. Just sat in the Library and stoned. A lot. I read This Side of Paradise and Norwegian Wood (again). I don't feel very much in school usually, just really numb. I feel nothing towards to the school and I just feel bitter and resentful. When JJ mentioned that he gets the feeling that I'm unhappy in school when he's not around.
He's right. I just throw myself at distractions to keep it away it became more apparent on Thursday. Just me, with my thoughts the entire day. I'm uncomfortable in school, and absolutely abhor/despise the AC culture. I refuse (occasionally diplomatically declining it) the absorb it, at all. Fine I'm prejudiced. And mercenary, unforgiving and harsh. Tell me what you will.
My only defense?
It's a matter of perspective.
I've officially given up on becoming an OGL (much to somebody's surprise and disappointment. I think she really wanted me to be one. Funny how Robindro mentioned that I'll make a good one too)
I still have unresolved issues and I have no intention of sowing seeds of resentment in happy!J1s especially if they are unprepared. It takes guts to hate a school, and great resolve which not everyone wants/has. Plus, I've got Art Soc to work on. Reviving it is going to take a large amount of time and effort. I have no idea how it'll be like for CCAAB (the CCA leaders camp. They are taking my weekend damnit!) At the very least, tahan. That's all.
I really wonder what makes me go to school.
It's definitely not the people.
Was so fonding reminded during one of the night studies, ever since then I totally stopped staying back.
Mon is right, we're just different
And I'm just a stubborn difficult person to know.
Curious how my classmates describe me, motherly. Who knows a trillion and one random/weird things.
Like how to use double-sided photocopying.
They don't.
I'm seriously.
maybe I should have gone CJC, it's too late to regret
Even going home sometimes isn't as pleasant as before. (other than the fact it's absolutely not conducive for studying)
It's too quiet.
Too empty.
Too big.
For me.
I miss my siblings terribly.
On to some UA-ing (useless anxiety)
I NEED TO PASS PROMOS.
I NEED TO PASS ALL MY SUBJECTS.
OMG
DIESSSS.
fuck, I'm positive all this swearing is rubbing off. And school makes me cranky. And emo. LOL
Although I'm kind of 'happy spin spin sugar high'-ish feeling.
I AM NOT MAKING ANY SENSE
Yes I'm just this confused teenager NO RLY.
Or rather, I miss IJ rooftop days. I was reminded of it when Ms Ving showed me the Secondary School rankings.
It reminds me of summer.
An endless summer
but
summertime is leaving me
you know it's leaving me
don't want to say
goodbye
PS, I <3 the piano bit in Cassis (Kie is going to fry me, she's anti-GazettE and that fanatical Kyo cosplayer I know from Provence who is currently in Sendai to watch Diru)
Does anyone have the Jin's Ha Ha rip? My sis wants. Thanks