I never know. ..
I have a feeling hanging out in the chatrooms chased Mike off. Just had a pretty long talk with him. ahh, hes such a sweetie, and monogomous minded. i don't know. I probably fucked things up with him, sal probably saw me hanging out in the now room and passed it on to mike. Which sucks, since i don't do anthing in the now room, i just chill and flirt. Okay, i'm gonna stop worrying over things i have already done and can't do anything to fix.
So Uncoffee went well of course friday. Sunday, after a horrible saturday night at deliverance, i went and met the cute guy from the upper west side. He was really nice and sweet and funny, but with a devilish side as well, and i had a good old fashioned tension breaking evening of fun with him. And then went off to face the execution squad at josh's house. He was sweet enough that i'd want to go back and do it again, but then monday night, the actual date with dan went really well. I had a lot of fun at dinner with him, and ( omg, i just realized i didn't eat dinner again oh well, too late now, going to bed soon. )
( and i almost wonder why mike asked me just now when i had school in the morning. He dropped it when i mentioned dan. but i don't know. leaves me wondering. anyway ) so i'm hanging out with dan again saturday. probably. I don't want to do anything to mess things up this time. So i'm really going to try to stay away from the aol and the chatrooms etc. maybe if i just uninstall aol now, and have them stop my service it'll be better. cut off the chance of problems from that flank.
But i also dont want to get my hopes up. I've gone out for coffee with him and gone on one date with him. He's a nice sweet guy and i seem to have a lot in common with him, but i've been tussled about lately by the guys in my life. Yes i know i wasn't innocent, and i know it was partially my fault in all cases probably, either through acting against my own better judgement and hanging out in the chats, or some sort of karmic retribution. I don't wanna get my hopes up too soon, but i also don't want to sabotage myself so early on. I like him, and i'm going to just try and go with the flow. He's cute, and i have been having fun with him. I really don't wanna screw it up this time. I was always monogomous, before i met rich. And since then, i've dated two guys at once, and its just not my style. I don't know what to do now with the uws guy, but i'm going to have to just stick with dan now. Mike reminded me, i shouldn't be looking for someone else, when i'm already seeing how things go with one guy. I can't be checking out my other prospects while i'm going out with one guy. it just won't work for me. and i know it won't.
Okay, well, i have gym grime to wash off tonight.
And apparently my picture turned up on some french free porn site. Totally infuriting. I sent the site owner an email asking him to take down my picture. And i hope he complys.
But yea, Dan, on saturday. I'm looking forward to hanging out and going to the museumm of the moving image, it sounds like fun =). He's a sweet guy. And he doesnt deserve for me to just give him half of my attention emotionally. He deserves all of me. And hopefully it'll work out, and he'll be intrested in me and keep dating, n maybe turn into something lasting =). but yeah, not gonna get my hopes up. lol.
am i deluding myself too much?
So Uncoffee went well of course friday. Sunday, after a horrible saturday night at deliverance, i went and met the cute guy from the upper west side. He was really nice and sweet and funny, but with a devilish side as well, and i had a good old fashioned tension breaking evening of fun with him. And then went off to face the execution squad at josh's house. He was sweet enough that i'd want to go back and do it again, but then monday night, the actual date with dan went really well. I had a lot of fun at dinner with him, and ( omg, i just realized i didn't eat dinner again oh well, too late now, going to bed soon. )
( and i almost wonder why mike asked me just now when i had school in the morning. He dropped it when i mentioned dan. but i don't know. leaves me wondering. anyway ) so i'm hanging out with dan again saturday. probably. I don't want to do anything to mess things up this time. So i'm really going to try to stay away from the aol and the chatrooms etc. maybe if i just uninstall aol now, and have them stop my service it'll be better. cut off the chance of problems from that flank.
But i also dont want to get my hopes up. I've gone out for coffee with him and gone on one date with him. He's a nice sweet guy and i seem to have a lot in common with him, but i've been tussled about lately by the guys in my life. Yes i know i wasn't innocent, and i know it was partially my fault in all cases probably, either through acting against my own better judgement and hanging out in the chats, or some sort of karmic retribution. I don't wanna get my hopes up too soon, but i also don't want to sabotage myself so early on. I like him, and i'm going to just try and go with the flow. He's cute, and i have been having fun with him. I really don't wanna screw it up this time. I was always monogomous, before i met rich. And since then, i've dated two guys at once, and its just not my style. I don't know what to do now with the uws guy, but i'm going to have to just stick with dan now. Mike reminded me, i shouldn't be looking for someone else, when i'm already seeing how things go with one guy. I can't be checking out my other prospects while i'm going out with one guy. it just won't work for me. and i know it won't.
Okay, well, i have gym grime to wash off tonight.
And apparently my picture turned up on some french free porn site. Totally infuriting. I sent the site owner an email asking him to take down my picture. And i hope he complys.
But yea, Dan, on saturday. I'm looking forward to hanging out and going to the museumm of the moving image, it sounds like fun =). He's a sweet guy. And he doesnt deserve for me to just give him half of my attention emotionally. He deserves all of me. And hopefully it'll work out, and he'll be intrested in me and keep dating, n maybe turn into something lasting =). but yeah, not gonna get my hopes up. lol.
am i deluding myself too much?