She wakes up to him in the morning, his arms around her, his cold lips on her neck in greeting. She smiles and turns around greeting him back with a kiss.
Good morning, they greet each other as the kiss ends.
It's sappy and cheesy and all those words they use to describe those moments in the movies, so perfect and romantic and surreal, it couldn't last.
But did it matter? Of course not.
Alec spends the mornings with her in her room, watching whatever is on TV, sneering as she eats her breakfast, him gulping down bottled blood like an alcoholic with wine and sometimes they'd talk about books they've both read.
They, unsurprisingly, have clashing views when it came to literature. She always sides with the good guys. He always sides with the bad guys.
The parallels are not lost on her and she resists the urge to throw the first edition copy of The Phantom of the Opera to his face as he insults her opinion without any amount of tact.
They spend the afternoons walking around Volterra, so covered up that people stare (It's Italy for the love of God and the afternoon heat is sizzling) but they (she) pretends not to care.
And they went about their way, hanging out at small cafes, shopping at boutiques and (Alec) threatening any of the Italian boys that try to approach her.
Alec's possessive, a little crazy (alright, more than a little) and has the sensitivity of a plastic spoon. He refuses to listen to any view aside from his own and he insults her taste in everything and anything and won't give her any peace of mind. However…
His hands are surprisingly gentle when he pushes her hair out of her face, his crimson eyes staring at her with an emotion she can't identify and he's breathtaking with his skin sparkling from the last remnants of rays from the sunset.
You're glowing, he states the obvious and smiles, like it's something funny and weird that he takes in and doesn't care.
And the thing is, she loves him and he loves her.
They spend the nights, dressed in casual clothes that still does nothing much to make themselves look less conspicuous to people. She isn't oblivious about the attractiveness of vampires, even being half garnered her more than enough attention but it isn't something she can help.
And people stare when they (her) eat at fancy little restaurants, waltz to sexy violin music, stroll at dark beaches with the waves cold against her bare feet, dance at clubs in a manner that would've made her father's jaw drop and laughing for no legitimate reason.
Alec's temptation with the face of an angel and a personality of a mischievous demon, his smile, his eyes, the way his hands touch every span of her skin, the tightness of his arms around her and the husky timber to his voice when she says something not meant to be heard by little children - it all draws her in and she gives in to temptation without thought.
She's on her third week mark in Italy, with Alec succeeding in invading all her thoughts and time, when she gets a call from….Nahuel. The guilt churns in her replacing the warm fuzzy feeling she has when she's with Alec and for a moment of shocking clarity, she wakes up as if from a daze.
Alec's sitting at his usual chair in her room, so engrossed in reading Nietzsche that he doesn't notice her moment of panic. Her breaths are small gasps, filled with horror and confusion, as if she's just woken from a nightmare.
Hello? Nahuel's voice still sounds as sweet as ever but it does nothing to calm her suddenly turbulent thoughts.
She feels like shouting, crying and running because she doesn't know what's going on. Why is she in love with Alec? Kissing him and hugging him and declaring undying love for him? What is going on? She's in love with Nahuel, she isn't-
And suddenly the fog returns and she smiles dreamily at Alec as he does the same.
She turns off her phone without thought.
Alec is out on a last minute mission with Felix when Jane comes into her room at the middle of the night and sits down on her bed. Her crimson eyes, so much like Alec's, stare at her with the same disgust and anger she's been showing Renesmee since she first arrived.
Renesmee's used to it by now and merely shrugs it off. And asks, What do you need, Jane?
She may not be on friendly terms with the blonde but she could at least try to be civil. She is the sister of her boyfriend/lover/pest/friend/whatever and like it or not, Alec loves his sister very much and expects the two girls in his life to try and get along.
Emphasis on 'try', Renesmee's a lot of things but downright delusional isn't one of them.
Do you love my brother? Jane asks, upfront, no beating around the bush. Jane's forwardness and strict honesty are some of the things she hates and admires about the girl.
Yes, She answers automatically because what fact could not be clearer in the entire world? She loves Alec, loves how he makes her feel.
Jane's full plump mouth twitches and the blonde vampire's eyebrows furrowed in thought. I didn't know it was this bad. Chelsea's really done some work on you.
Chelsea? The relationship manipulator?
As if reading her thoughts, Jane continues speaking. Yes, Cullen. Chelsea. Aro wanted you to stay, wanted you part of his ever growing collection. Marcus noticed the mutual attraction between you and Alec...and well, a little lust goes a long way especially with Chelsea's power. The sneer on her face is more pronounced now. It's pathetic really, seeing one of the most feared vampires in the world all cozy with a freak.
The information sinks into her mind slowly, her thought processors trying to understand the jumble of words that comes out of Jane's mouth. They don't sound right, they sound wrong and cruel and unreal.
Y-You're lying, she stammers out and Jane only raises an eyebrow at her denial.
No, I'm not. You know I'm not. Jane even rolls her eyes in exasperation. Chelsea's going on a mission in two days, far away enough that her powers won't be able to affect you. By then, if you can finally think clearly again, you decide if you still want to stay or not.
And then she leaves, leaving Renesmee alone with her thoughts and an upcoming headache.
Just as Jane said, Chelsea leaves Volterra on a mission after two days and Renesmee waits on her bed, feeling the ebbing of the fog in her mind and the voice of lucidity returning.
A part of her is angry, pissed off at the callous manipulation of her will and feelings and another part, the part clearly still affected by Chelsea's powers feels like crying because everything she had with Alec is nothing but a big, fat lie.
Alec enters her room quietly and she rises from the bed as he moves closer, confusion and…pain on his face.
I don't… the words escape his lips but they don't mean anything, can't express what he's really feeling. There are truly no words to describe the loss they both feel. She isn't the only victim in this heartless game.
Slowly, gingerly, she reaches for him, pulling their bodies closer until their bodies are molded together in the familiarly developed in the last few weeks. She cups his beautiful face, staring into crimson eyes that stare into her own and she kisses him, softly, with all the time in the world.
His lips are cold as they've always been, like ice against fire, they melt and chill each other in an evasive dance of wills and pleasure. They are opposites trapped in a game of lies and lust.
The kiss ends slowly, his lips grasping unto hers until the last most painful second.
This isn't real, is it? She asks - states quietly, her voice barely above a whisper but he hears her all the same.
And for the first time, he seems sad. The arrogance and mania is gone, stripped away and she sees Alec, the real Alec, bare and wide open. He doesn't say anything, no denial or agreement, he just stares at her sadly, his hand still on her cheek, caressing her skin softly as if trying to memorize it.
There is only silence and she realizes this was their goodbye.
She leaves for Volterra the next morning, no one comes to stop her or even give their goodbyes. Alec left the previous night to go along with Chelsea's mission and she doesn't blame him.
She finds it painful to look at him and he must feel the same.
She arrives in Paris in her Ferrari, watching the blinking lights of the Eiffel tower and she sighs, for some reason, feeling immensely tired.
The rest of her trip consists of Austria, Germany, Denmark, the United Kingdom, Iceland and Greenland. And she could bore you with the facts, really, she could. As you would love to hear all about the sights and the things she did and didn't do.
But the thing is, she's tired, really tired. Confused, a little bit angry and tired and she has come to realize that her little road trip, the one she embarked on to go and find herself has only succeeded in headaches, heartbreaks and misguided freedom.
She's on the boat going to Iceland when she feels for the first time - homesickness.
Only one person greets her at Montreal.
Jacob Black with his sunny smile and hair too long to be a boy's greets her happily with the warmest hug she's had in a while and she melts into it.
I missed you, she tells him sincerely and wonders if her little trip would've been different with him around. No falling for beautiful vampire boys to be sure.
I missed you too, he laughingly replies, just happy to have her back and with her luggage in his muscled arms, they go home.
The trip in the rabbit is quiet. Renesmee doesn't really want to talk about her trip and Jacob doesn't really have anything to say.
This torturous silence is only broken after Jacob remembers something.
This came in the mail for you, Jacob hands her a postcard with a picture of the Statue of Liberty. She blinks in surprise and reads the words at the back written in neat text-like handwriting.
Thinking of you.
-N
She stares at it far longer than any moment should and she remembers sweet kisses and tequila bottles and the undeniable feeling of belonging to someone.
She smiles and thinks about her next trip.
To New York, maybe? She hears it's quite nice there.