post #15

[seoulfulness]

Fics( #14).
lost and founds snsd, tiffany/sunny
Unlucky exo, kris/suho
how I like my coffee exo kai/d.o.
does running away mean we're acccepted, finally? shinee, key/onew
shut up and let me pay the rent exo, baekhyun/d.o
lik a child exo, suho/kai
Complication exo, sehun/luhan
deep down 4minute, jiyoon-centric, jiyoon/gayoon
untitled exo, chanyeol
i

Comments

but i've become what i can't be; exo, kai/baekhyun [2/2]

[anonymous]

"Do you think-" Jongin blurts out around a mouthful of rice cake- "that the fans would freak out if they knew what we're really like, hyung?"

Baekhyun pauses mid-bite. "Them? Nah," he says, "remember what they taught us when we first joined the company? Choose a persona, and stick to it like your life depends on it, because it does. The fans don't need to know."

Jongin nods slowly. " 'Kay. I just wish I hadn't...ah, I don't know what to feel. At the fansigning event yesterday, a noona told me 'Jongin-ah, stay sexy forever!' and I just...what if I don't want to be?"

Baekhyun hums. "We're entertainers. We can't escape what the fans want us to be. I don't want to be the cheerful one forever, but what can I do? See the comments left by the fans that time somebody caught me in a bad mood, Jongin. It makes me feel like I've failed as a performer, even if just for a second. Don't you feel that way?"

Jongin's lower lip juts out a little as he pokes at the remnants of his ddeokbokki. He says nothing, but Baekhyun can hear his unspoken worries, loud and clear. "Yeah, I know. We have no choice. They say they'll accept us no matter how our personalities may change, but the truth is, they can't."

It’s Jongin’s turn to heave a long, drawn-out sigh, and the older boy knows that he’s admitted defeat. To be honest, the sound terrifies him. There's a hint of resignation in it that just doesn't belong to an eighteen-year-old. But this is who they are, this is what they've chosen for themselves. How can he not accept it?

"We’ve been here for too long, Jongin-ah, we'd better get back to the dorm before Manager-hyung wakes up to check on us," Baekhyun murmurs, spearing Jongin’s last piece of rice cake with his fork and feeding it to him. Jongin scrunches up his nose, but wipes his mouth on the sleeve of his hoodie ("Hey, what happened to Key-hyung's etiquette lessons?") and stands up anyway, chair legs scraping noisily against the pavement.

This time, Baekhyun's the one to lead the younger boy away, leaving the shadows of two young, beautiful, troubled boys sitting underneath the flickering streetlight.

op

[anonymous]

thank you so much for the fill! this was really sweet :)

Re: op

[anonymous]

glad you liked it, op ^^

Re: but i've become what i can't be; exo, kai/baekhyun [2/2]

[anonymous]

this was really nice. tbh i'd prefer their real selves over personas any day but thats just me. this drabble you've written makes me think they might not like their personas either.

thank you for sharing this ^^

Re: but i've become what i can't be; exo, kai/baekhyun [2/2]

[anonymous]

i guess there's no way we'll ever know for sure ;; but thank you for reading~