I find myself distracted
I met a guy on the weekend that has really got me distracted.
Young, blonde, slim... all the things I dont go for unless its a girl.
Yet i'm struggling to get him outta my mind. He's a friend of a friend, and came to my chinese new year celebrations.
I cant meet his eyes when he stairs at me with those bluey hazel eyes. My palms are sweaty and i get shy. So distracted that everything empties outta my head.
Spent alot of time getting to know him Saturday, as he was unexpectedly out and about, with his mates.
I reckon his friends dont like me cos I kinda hogged his time. Some days I wish I couldnt read facial expressions as well as I do.
We danced for awhile (well i did) and he kinda moved intimately closer, and it was like the whole "kiss me" feeling. I just couldnt though, partly cos we were intoxicated and partly cos theres too much in my head. Maybe I should of drank more.
We had a connection... but thats really no longer enough for me. Both of us are still getting over ex's. Maybe I never will, but am alot more willing than he is to enter a new one.
For now I think I need to have him as a friend. Rather than someone to date and see how it goes. Hes a friend of a friend and I dont know how they'd react if I dated him. Thats supposing he was interested!
But man ... hes taking alot of my brain processing power. I can feel the feelings of intensity when my body knows that hes a right on alot of levels. Maybe I just dont trust my feelings anymore (I am still single after all). Life wise I am ready to start a relationship. Got the job, the friends, and mentally I am prepared.
Is this what getting old is like? Being more cautious? Not sure I want to be this way. Prefer to wild and free.
Winsor... The Nark... Mooning over a guy who is totally in my head.