Mar 09, 2003 07:59
All that I expect to know is that I have grown cold. Not completely. There are still some aspects that I feel about. Namely four. But soon those will be iced over as well. And then I will have no more imagry or symbolism or 'constructive criticism' or silly debates or explinations that mean a damn.
I realized this now: they never really did. mean a damn.
i dont know anything . i believed in communication. but its existance is questionable. I feel more warm towards the macro than the micro these days. otherwise, i am indifferent.
i failed in my thought that i could assume a relationship with someone who was nothing like myself. turns out, many of the same qualities exist between us.
more than twice i have been told that i was in love with you. i have never uttered the words on my own. one other entity has badgered me incessantly with his protests to my ideas and decisions. another has gracefully accepted. and i am grateful. and i am glad.
communication produced a medium in fifty percent of the situations.
so i have treated this as a dear diary. this is me for all of you to have at. in her words 'go.'