Loss and the meaning of time......
This weekend sure has sucked big time. Too many reminders of my own mortality to sit well so close to Christmas......
On Friday, I received a call at 5:15pm in the afternoon. It was my dear friend, Redeem147, whom I have known since close to the beginning of the last millenium (oh, yeah - that was only 3 years ago so it must be LONGER!!!).
Anyway, she sounded awful and little did I know what she was going to say during that call. Her father had just passed away and she was on her way down to her parents' place to be with her mom. A pin could have hit the floor as I could not believe my ears. I started to cry uncontrollably but somehow mananged to keep talking to her.
I reassured her as much as I could being on the phone and told her to call me later once she had arrived and then let me know what I could do, if anything. Then the phone was dead.
I loved her dad......he was so kind and good. He had invited, with a little help from Redeem147, those of us who worked on PRIMEDIA to their old place up in Malton for summer pool parties, gave us space for our yard sales we used to have as fundraisers for the convention, just too nice for words. And on top of that! he was a spitting reflection of Patrick Stewart! You could not ask for much more than that......how many people can claim to have had a BBQ with Picard. Not many, I am sure.
I was working on marking when she called and I found myself just doing the same old thing on remote control. Tears would not stop but I had no where to go and did not want to just stand there crying. I finally text-messaged my husband, TheBitterGuy, at work to let him know (it was only 5 minutes later but felt like eternity) and his immediate response was "Shit!". He and Mr. Egan had met on a couple od occasions at the old house - the last time being when we had dropped by to pick up some stuff they did not want to take to the new house. Good memories for both of us there. Mr. Egan shall be missed.....yes, he always insisted I call him by his first name but for me it was either Dad or Mr. Egan and so it shall always be.
Then came Saturday. My friend Rob Wilson passed away almost a month ago exactly. A mutal friend had put together a memorial service for Rob on Saturday. I knew that Redeem147 was not up to going (and Rob would have never forgiven her if she had left her mom alone at this time). I found out our friend Valerie was also not going - due to her dad having another heart attack and being on the slow road to recovery again. This left me and TheBitterGuy to go and represent those unable to attend.
It was cold but sunny when we arrived. The church is on Regent St. which is exactly one block long. This church is the family church of the person who arranged the memorial service - our friend (and Rob's long-time friend) Andy. Some people associated with the theatre group, the Scarborough Players, who I knew and some whom I did not know also attended. A good buddy of Rob's, actor George Buza, was there....I had met George on a few occasions and he had also been a guest at PRIMEDIA. Some of Rob's old neighbours were also there.
There was a Macedonian priest - not in a long flowing beard which amazed me - since the church is orthodox. He did a short ceremony in front of two pictures of Rob.....headshots but still nice. One of him with his biker tatoos and the "nice" one he really hated but good for agents. There was a loaf of bread and some type of pudding as well on the table. Found out later that Andy's mom had made it and it was a traditional offering at memorials. It tasted good.
After Andy invited us to speak, if we wanted, about Rob but all were shy to do so. So we helped ourselves to sandwiches, brownies and drinks and then spoke one on one or in small groups about him. He would have liked it better that way.....than being singled out.
I cried again.......
Now I have to prepare for Tuesday and Redeem147's father's memorial.
Seems like it was only yesterday, I heard the news about Rick.....and now all this.
Going to crawl into bed and hide under the covers until it all goes away!
On Friday, I received a call at 5:15pm in the afternoon. It was my dear friend, Redeem147, whom I have known since close to the beginning of the last millenium (oh, yeah - that was only 3 years ago so it must be LONGER!!!).
Anyway, she sounded awful and little did I know what she was going to say during that call. Her father had just passed away and she was on her way down to her parents' place to be with her mom. A pin could have hit the floor as I could not believe my ears. I started to cry uncontrollably but somehow mananged to keep talking to her.
I reassured her as much as I could being on the phone and told her to call me later once she had arrived and then let me know what I could do, if anything. Then the phone was dead.
I loved her dad......he was so kind and good. He had invited, with a little help from Redeem147, those of us who worked on PRIMEDIA to their old place up in Malton for summer pool parties, gave us space for our yard sales we used to have as fundraisers for the convention, just too nice for words. And on top of that! he was a spitting reflection of Patrick Stewart! You could not ask for much more than that......how many people can claim to have had a BBQ with Picard. Not many, I am sure.
I was working on marking when she called and I found myself just doing the same old thing on remote control. Tears would not stop but I had no where to go and did not want to just stand there crying. I finally text-messaged my husband, TheBitterGuy, at work to let him know (it was only 5 minutes later but felt like eternity) and his immediate response was "Shit!". He and Mr. Egan had met on a couple od occasions at the old house - the last time being when we had dropped by to pick up some stuff they did not want to take to the new house. Good memories for both of us there. Mr. Egan shall be missed.....yes, he always insisted I call him by his first name but for me it was either Dad or Mr. Egan and so it shall always be.
Then came Saturday. My friend Rob Wilson passed away almost a month ago exactly. A mutal friend had put together a memorial service for Rob on Saturday. I knew that Redeem147 was not up to going (and Rob would have never forgiven her if she had left her mom alone at this time). I found out our friend Valerie was also not going - due to her dad having another heart attack and being on the slow road to recovery again. This left me and TheBitterGuy to go and represent those unable to attend.
It was cold but sunny when we arrived. The church is on Regent St. which is exactly one block long. This church is the family church of the person who arranged the memorial service - our friend (and Rob's long-time friend) Andy. Some people associated with the theatre group, the Scarborough Players, who I knew and some whom I did not know also attended. A good buddy of Rob's, actor George Buza, was there....I had met George on a few occasions and he had also been a guest at PRIMEDIA. Some of Rob's old neighbours were also there.
There was a Macedonian priest - not in a long flowing beard which amazed me - since the church is orthodox. He did a short ceremony in front of two pictures of Rob.....headshots but still nice. One of him with his biker tatoos and the "nice" one he really hated but good for agents. There was a loaf of bread and some type of pudding as well on the table. Found out later that Andy's mom had made it and it was a traditional offering at memorials. It tasted good.
After Andy invited us to speak, if we wanted, about Rob but all were shy to do so. So we helped ourselves to sandwiches, brownies and drinks and then spoke one on one or in small groups about him. He would have liked it better that way.....than being singled out.
I cried again.......
Now I have to prepare for Tuesday and Redeem147's father's memorial.
Seems like it was only yesterday, I heard the news about Rick.....and now all this.
Going to crawl into bed and hide under the covers until it all goes away!