and in the end, every living creature gets what they deserve.

[senesence]

i'm a liar
unintentionally or not
i've lied like there was no tomorrow
and i wake up in the midst of it all
realizing that i'm alone

"it's ok to be alone u know..."

then why does it feel like utter shit
why do i not want to wake up
or do anything sober for that matter
it's not fair
but i suppose it is
i'm reaping what i sew, i'm getting what i deserve, etc...
but it's not fair
i love you
i really did

[-] never really had glass, so it's not like i had something to lose
[-] ray will never speak to me
[-] jerry is a friend...

so yes, i'm getting what i deserve i suppose
but it's not fucking fair, dammit....

i've accepted all circumstances
and should be ok with that
but i'm not...
and i can't stop crying

perhaps the most frightening element
is that everything is so blurry...

...how did i get here ?

dammit matthew, how did u become this person
how did u fucking get here

[::sigh::]

u know it's a bad day when even the new timbaland joint doesn't cheer u up...