WHEN I SLEEP
I learned to program on a Commodore 64, shut up!
10 LET M = AMOUNT_I_THINK_I_WILL_ENJOY_THE_NEXT_15_MINUTES
20 LET N = AMOUNT_I_FEEL_I_WILL_REGRET_NOT_GOING_TO_BED_NOW
30 IF M < N THEN GOTO BED AND SLEEP
40 IF M < N THEN GOTO 80
50 IF M > N THEN STAY UP 15 MORE MINUTES
60 DELAY = 15 MINUTES
70 GOTO 10
80 LET X = AMOUNT_I_THINK_I_WILL_ENJOY_STAYING_IN_BED_FOR_THE_NEXT_3_MINUTES
90 LET Y = AMOUNT_I_FEEL_I_WILL_REGRET_STAYING_IN_BED_SO_LONG
100 IF X < Y THEN GET UP
110 IF X > Y THEN STAY IN BED
120 IF X > Y THEN DELAY = 3 MINUTES
130 IF X > Y THEN GOTO 80
120 MAKE SELF PRESENTABLE
130 COLLECT HUGS
140 FIND NEW THINGS TO FEED YOUR BRAIN
150 HELP FRIENDS
160 EAT WHEN HUNGRY
170 BREATHE AS NECESSARY
REM "NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS"
190 CLEAN
200 UNWIND
210 GOTO 10
10 LET M = AMOUNT_I_THINK_I_WILL_ENJOY_THE_NEXT_15_MINUTES
20 LET N = AMOUNT_I_FEEL_I_WILL_REGRET_NOT_GOING_TO_BED_NOW
30 IF M < N THEN GOTO BED AND SLEEP
40 IF M < N THEN GOTO 80
50 IF M > N THEN STAY UP 15 MORE MINUTES
60 DELAY = 15 MINUTES
70 GOTO 10
80 LET X = AMOUNT_I_THINK_I_WILL_ENJOY_STAYING_IN_BED_FOR_THE_NEXT_3_MINUTES
90 LET Y = AMOUNT_I_FEEL_I_WILL_REGRET_STAYING_IN_BED_SO_LONG
100 IF X < Y THEN GET UP
110 IF X > Y THEN STAY IN BED
120 IF X > Y THEN DELAY = 3 MINUTES
130 IF X > Y THEN GOTO 80
120 MAKE SELF PRESENTABLE
130 COLLECT HUGS
140 FIND NEW THINGS TO FEED YOUR BRAIN
150 HELP FRIENDS
160 EAT WHEN HUNGRY
170 BREATHE AS NECESSARY
REM "NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS"
190 CLEAN
200 UNWIND
210 GOTO 10