(no subject)
Blah. Thats all I really have to say.
Too much homework, too much college stuff, too much of everything. Christmas is just around the corner and I'm not ready. First christmas without my grandma so that should be pretty weird and sad. Can't wait til I get to be out of this place for good.
I miss my friends. I miss the people I used to hang out with and make me smile. I miss Mary Beth. She and I used to be really close and talk about everything and now I hardly get to speak to her and it bugs me. I know I have been so hectically busy lately and it sucks that I never get to catch up on things with the people that really matter. Maybe one of these days. I know I need it.
Alicia Connor, one of my good friends since nursery school passed away recently so that was a hard, direct hit. She was such a kind person. I had known her since we were like 2 yrs old so it just is weird to know that someone my age could die unexpectedly,so fast. I can honestly say in many, many accounts- I wish it would have been me. That is a sad fact...to know you feel that way and can't do anything about it. I try and turn to God, but I can never give my full self to him lately. I've been quite angry with him lately which is human...and i don't understand his plan. I know that all will come through and He loves me and He is always there. I just feel really alone...the people I used to turn to I feel I have pushed them away and I hate it.
I need help.
Jes
Too much homework, too much college stuff, too much of everything. Christmas is just around the corner and I'm not ready. First christmas without my grandma so that should be pretty weird and sad. Can't wait til I get to be out of this place for good.
I miss my friends. I miss the people I used to hang out with and make me smile. I miss Mary Beth. She and I used to be really close and talk about everything and now I hardly get to speak to her and it bugs me. I know I have been so hectically busy lately and it sucks that I never get to catch up on things with the people that really matter. Maybe one of these days. I know I need it.
Alicia Connor, one of my good friends since nursery school passed away recently so that was a hard, direct hit. She was such a kind person. I had known her since we were like 2 yrs old so it just is weird to know that someone my age could die unexpectedly,so fast. I can honestly say in many, many accounts- I wish it would have been me. That is a sad fact...to know you feel that way and can't do anything about it. I try and turn to God, but I can never give my full self to him lately. I've been quite angry with him lately which is human...and i don't understand his plan. I know that all will come through and He loves me and He is always there. I just feel really alone...the people I used to turn to I feel I have pushed them away and I hate it.
I need help.
Jes