Muddled thoughts swirling around a messy livejournal entry
Things to accomplish:
- English blog
- editorial letter for English
- final paper for English
- Environmental Science case study report
- 2 major papers for Filipino
- Read State of War for Lit 13
- Read the rest of the short stories for Filipino
- Lit homework
- Study for final exams!!!
... and of course, more grueling tasks are to come in the last few weeks of the first semester.
I definitely need to work more quickly now in order to finish them all on time. Although I am really terrible at proper time management mainly since I work ever so slowly. Merely writing a blog entry sometimes takes up hours of my time because I am a stickler for revising my work over and over again until I am satisfied with the words I type. I reread passages and difficult sentences, especially in readings from English and Filipino literature, again and again, until I can discover the meaning beyond the lines - although it rarely happens. I get frustrated when I leave a math problem that I cannot solve, unsolved. I don't mind spending hours over a single problem; my mind tells me I need to find the answer, no matter what.
That is how I study, and I think this is what works for me. The only problem is, it takes up too much time - will I ever survive college given my present study habits? There is a time management tip that tells us that there is such a thing as good enough. But I do not believe that. I believe that we must strive to be the best that we can be, no matter how much time it takes. Why settle for good enough, when you always still exert some effort in going the extra mile?
***
"It is easy to follow, but it is uninteresting to do easy things. We find out about ourselves only when we take risks, when we challenge and question." - Magdalena Abakanowicz
That quote is from Rosie Hardy, a British 17-year-old amateur photographer who became famous for her touching surreal yet true-to-life fairy tale with a charming photographer formed in Flickr (see my previous entry, Love Beyond Borders). She is one of my role models; I will always look up to her as the girl who is never afraid of being herself, for standing up for what she believes in. She follows up that quote with her personal thoughts on her self-portrait she posted on the site:
"Today's 365 was inspired by my all-time favorite photograph. It's called "Learning to Fly", and right now i can relate to it more than ever. There are always going to be risks in life, but the greatest risk of all would be deciding not to take them, only to miss out on what could be the greatest thing in the world.
I am so close to my dream, nothing can stand in my way."
- Rosie Hardy
Rosie and Aaron have posted new fantastic photos! Every photo mesmerizes me that I am now digressing from my own blog entry. They are such a magical couple. They even have their own site and blog! They also are making a fruitful business out of their fantastic photography and post-production skills. I am deeply inspired by Rosie. She's seventeen and living her life in the way she wants it to be: working on beautiful photography, spending time with the love of her life (who's currently thousands of miles away), and inspiring people from all over the world.
***
Which leaves me thinking: How about me? What on earth am I here for? What is it that I want to do during the limited time I have in this life? Why is it that so many fortunate ones are already certain about what they want to do and have their lives all mapped out in this seemingly concrete image they have of their future selves, while some are left lost, constantly searching yet sometimes they do not know what they are looking for?
Maybe I lack confidence. Maybe my purpose in life is already staring at me right in the face and I am just too blind to see it. I understand that I need to have a passion, that I simply have to know what I love to do for the rest of my life, and maybe the missing pieces will eventually fall into place. This of course, applies to everyone. We have to keep looking for what will truly make us happy, and we must not stop until we find it.
On my list of 43things, one of my life goals is to find my passion. I have recently checked this goal and made a corresponding entry to it:
My first love (after books and him, of course)
I love writing. I feel happy when I write. Finishing a blog entry, writing a paper for English class, or simply typing in artistic, well-written prose gives me a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment. I have been writing since high school and loving it. I knew what my passion is all along, sometimes a lot of challenges along the way made me not notice it.
Problem is, I don’t know whether I really want to be in the future. Even though I can imagine myself writing my whole life, something is still missing. I want to do more, be more. That is my next goal. To seek another passion that will make me complete.
I may have found my passion, but I think having a passion is not complete without a purpose. I do not see the point in writing when I do not write for anyone. I dream of touching people's lives through the power of words, to be able to write in imaginative, creative prose, to be able to weave words together beautifully, for readers to understand what I am trying to express. Not only in writing, but maybe, just maybe, I can find more things that I can be good at.
I dream of making a difference.
I want to create change.
I yearn to help those less fortunate than me.
I long to give back what I have learned and share my wisdom to others.
I do not want to spend my life living only for myself.
This is what I am unable to do...yet. And I will never stop until I make it. That is my next goal: doing passion with a purpose.
***
"Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create." - Albert Einstein
I want to share Rosie's stunning self-portrait here, but I do not want to copy-paste her work all the time. Here's the picture. I envy her inimitable imagination.
- English blog
- editorial letter for English
- final paper for English
- Environmental Science case study report
- 2 major papers for Filipino
- Read State of War for Lit 13
- Read the rest of the short stories for Filipino
- Lit homework
- Study for final exams!!!
... and of course, more grueling tasks are to come in the last few weeks of the first semester.
I definitely need to work more quickly now in order to finish them all on time. Although I am really terrible at proper time management mainly since I work ever so slowly. Merely writing a blog entry sometimes takes up hours of my time because I am a stickler for revising my work over and over again until I am satisfied with the words I type. I reread passages and difficult sentences, especially in readings from English and Filipino literature, again and again, until I can discover the meaning beyond the lines - although it rarely happens. I get frustrated when I leave a math problem that I cannot solve, unsolved. I don't mind spending hours over a single problem; my mind tells me I need to find the answer, no matter what.
That is how I study, and I think this is what works for me. The only problem is, it takes up too much time - will I ever survive college given my present study habits? There is a time management tip that tells us that there is such a thing as good enough. But I do not believe that. I believe that we must strive to be the best that we can be, no matter how much time it takes. Why settle for good enough, when you always still exert some effort in going the extra mile?
***
"It is easy to follow, but it is uninteresting to do easy things. We find out about ourselves only when we take risks, when we challenge and question." - Magdalena Abakanowicz
That quote is from Rosie Hardy, a British 17-year-old amateur photographer who became famous for her touching surreal yet true-to-life fairy tale with a charming photographer formed in Flickr (see my previous entry, Love Beyond Borders). She is one of my role models; I will always look up to her as the girl who is never afraid of being herself, for standing up for what she believes in. She follows up that quote with her personal thoughts on her self-portrait she posted on the site:
"Today's 365 was inspired by my all-time favorite photograph. It's called "Learning to Fly", and right now i can relate to it more than ever. There are always going to be risks in life, but the greatest risk of all would be deciding not to take them, only to miss out on what could be the greatest thing in the world.
I am so close to my dream, nothing can stand in my way."
- Rosie Hardy
Rosie and Aaron have posted new fantastic photos! Every photo mesmerizes me that I am now digressing from my own blog entry. They are such a magical couple. They even have their own site and blog! They also are making a fruitful business out of their fantastic photography and post-production skills. I am deeply inspired by Rosie. She's seventeen and living her life in the way she wants it to be: working on beautiful photography, spending time with the love of her life (who's currently thousands of miles away), and inspiring people from all over the world.
***
Which leaves me thinking: How about me? What on earth am I here for? What is it that I want to do during the limited time I have in this life? Why is it that so many fortunate ones are already certain about what they want to do and have their lives all mapped out in this seemingly concrete image they have of their future selves, while some are left lost, constantly searching yet sometimes they do not know what they are looking for?
Maybe I lack confidence. Maybe my purpose in life is already staring at me right in the face and I am just too blind to see it. I understand that I need to have a passion, that I simply have to know what I love to do for the rest of my life, and maybe the missing pieces will eventually fall into place. This of course, applies to everyone. We have to keep looking for what will truly make us happy, and we must not stop until we find it.
On my list of 43things, one of my life goals is to find my passion. I have recently checked this goal and made a corresponding entry to it:
My first love (after books and him, of course)
I love writing. I feel happy when I write. Finishing a blog entry, writing a paper for English class, or simply typing in artistic, well-written prose gives me a sense of accomplishment and fulfillment. I have been writing since high school and loving it. I knew what my passion is all along, sometimes a lot of challenges along the way made me not notice it.
Problem is, I don’t know whether I really want to be in the future. Even though I can imagine myself writing my whole life, something is still missing. I want to do more, be more. That is my next goal. To seek another passion that will make me complete.
I may have found my passion, but I think having a passion is not complete without a purpose. I do not see the point in writing when I do not write for anyone. I dream of touching people's lives through the power of words, to be able to write in imaginative, creative prose, to be able to weave words together beautifully, for readers to understand what I am trying to express. Not only in writing, but maybe, just maybe, I can find more things that I can be good at.
I dream of making a difference.
I want to create change.
I yearn to help those less fortunate than me.
I long to give back what I have learned and share my wisdom to others.
I do not want to spend my life living only for myself.
This is what I am unable to do...yet. And I will never stop until I make it. That is my next goal: doing passion with a purpose.
***
"Imagination is more important than knowledge. For while knowledge defines all we currently know and understand, imagination points to all we might yet discover and create." - Albert Einstein
I want to share Rosie's stunning self-portrait here, but I do not want to copy-paste her work all the time. Here's the picture. I envy her inimitable imagination.