Past Hurting the Present

Jan 21, 2008 11:22

A little background.... On the day of my father's funeral we went to my Uncle's house after the service. we all began to talk about my Dad (most of which was not so nice). My Uncle decides that that moment would be a good time to tell us how my Dad was constantly cheating on my mother when they were married. My parents divorced when I was 13 and my dad died when I was 22.

So 6 years has passed since that day and no one has spoke a word of it to my Mom. Until last week my sister decides to talk to Mom about it. My brother is back to his womanizing ways and has been the topic od many discussions which I guess led to my sister to bringing this fact to my Mom's attention. So my sister tells my Mom that we were told my dad cheated on her throughout their entire marriage. I do not know how the conversation progressed because my sister never told me she had brought it up to my Mom at all.

Last night my Mom calls and wants to talk to me about life in general as we usually do on Sundays. She asks how my brother is and I say he has dug himself a hole having been caught by his girlfriend at another woman's house. So my Mom tells me that sara told her what my Uncle had said to us about my dad. She was hurt and upset. She said she stayed because my dad had her convinced that she couldn't make it on her own. He had her terrified to drive the expressway and she had only a high school diploma. she told me she was terrified of what life would have been like on her own. They were married when she was 17 while she was a senior in High school. He went to Vietnam and she moved back in with her parents. She had never lived alone, ever. She never wanted us to know. Never wanted us to think she was a failure.

I told her it didn't matter. She got a degree, she found a good job and she left when she could. She raised me alone and and did a good job. She is the strongest woman I know. I don't judge her or look down on her, I simply love and admire her more.
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