(no subject)
Can't sleep. Batman was amazing. To curb massive casualties at work, I super glued a quarter to the floor in front of the register. Top score = 24 in one shift. This only prolongs the inevitable. That I will be fired shortly. Hopefully. I don't want to quit cause I'm trying to help my aunt there, but she hasn't worked there over a month, and if, unbeknownst to her I get fired for A. Out of work attire B. Stealing C. the 10 complaints to the 1-800 number just in June, D. Blatent disregard for punctuality, E. Stealing F. Under the influence on the job... I've never tried so hard to do anything at work, and it's to get fired, try as I may, try as I must, I am a failure at being a failure. I'm not sure if this institutes a double negative, or awakens the Irony gods, and they bask in this excited ring of fire I have ignited and maybe just maybe, I get a break and shit works out, movie style. I also purposely stare into the camera everytime I acquire a free sample of product, but no one watches tape. I pray someone's like "Hey, you glued a quarter to the floor, and I, a cheap idiot, fell for it. That takes balls, how does Vice President of my company sound?" or "Hey guy, you want this bag of money? It comes with my Porsche." Why yes, kind sir, I do. I do indeed. I would rather watch one Hillary Swank movie a month, than work there. And I hate that goat. Fuck. Birds, too late/early, work in a matter of hours. Maybe today's the day.
If you ever want to place an anonymous bomb threat, that can be done at 1-508-226-2150. Please do.
Please.
If you ever want to place an anonymous bomb threat, that can be done at 1-508-226-2150. Please do.
Please.