life gets better
everyone has that moment when everything just crashes to hell at the peek of greatness. well this entire experience with laura has been just that! oh man shit has been crazy. im sure more so for her. she has been the one who has had to deal with most of it. most of the humiliation, imbarrasment and now im finding out she has issues going on that i have nothing to do with so it adding that much more ontop of it all. all i want is to be there for her. if nothing more than as a friend... where am i going with this?
well tonight while i was on my way to go bowling (which i kicked some for real ass at) laura sends me a text on my phone. it was a pleasant suprise. i in a million years would not have thought she would have contacted me on her own. it was very cool. THANK YOU LAURA! anywase she apologized for a few things, and i apologized. we had a decent conversation on the text msg. it was nice. i still very much so wish that her and i could sit down, just the 2 of us, and have dinner and just talk. talk about life, the situation, me fucking up royaly, and what all has been going on with her. and maybe even after that maybe we still wont be friends but atleast i would have that last chance face - to - face to tell her how sorry i am. im sure she knows or atleast has heard it. but i so need to be faced to her. as i have said. im still not over her. she was the #1 and still is the #1.
i have been thinking about the move. im not so sure im going to do it yet. i have a full month left but i dont know. is racing that important to me? i would be going somewhere i have nothing for this. no friends, no life. and with it there is no guarantee that i will go anywhere with this. is this what i want?
i joined a band... we have alex at drums and eric at bass/vocs. im ofcourse on guitar. alex is a total gung-ho on this band thing we have been talking music and making music non-stop but eric... where has he been? neither alex nor i have been able to get a hold of him. maybe hes not fit for the part? welp better get to bed. gotta work in the mornin! :)
well tonight while i was on my way to go bowling (which i kicked some for real ass at) laura sends me a text on my phone. it was a pleasant suprise. i in a million years would not have thought she would have contacted me on her own. it was very cool. THANK YOU LAURA! anywase she apologized for a few things, and i apologized. we had a decent conversation on the text msg. it was nice. i still very much so wish that her and i could sit down, just the 2 of us, and have dinner and just talk. talk about life, the situation, me fucking up royaly, and what all has been going on with her. and maybe even after that maybe we still wont be friends but atleast i would have that last chance face - to - face to tell her how sorry i am. im sure she knows or atleast has heard it. but i so need to be faced to her. as i have said. im still not over her. she was the #1 and still is the #1.
i have been thinking about the move. im not so sure im going to do it yet. i have a full month left but i dont know. is racing that important to me? i would be going somewhere i have nothing for this. no friends, no life. and with it there is no guarantee that i will go anywhere with this. is this what i want?
i joined a band... we have alex at drums and eric at bass/vocs. im ofcourse on guitar. alex is a total gung-ho on this band thing we have been talking music and making music non-stop but eric... where has he been? neither alex nor i have been able to get a hold of him. maybe hes not fit for the part? welp better get to bed. gotta work in the mornin! :)