Stalking the internet and contemplating the world while I wait

Feb 21, 2011 09:51

I joined a stalker-site yesterday, the "Florum" as they call it. Usually I avoid these like the plague, but I started reading this one while I was bored and they reminded me of our thread on Solia. The way they talk, the inside jokes they form, the way I can tell these people are going to talk to each other long after the forum has died, it's all the same. I miss our thread so much, so I suppose I swallowed my pride and jumped in. I'm enjoying it a lot so far. Definitly feels like the good old Batman thread.

College seriously need to send me at least one acceptance letter within the next week or I might die of impatience. I refresh my email every ten minutes hoping I will get something. I just want to be able to fantasize about my college experience, and it's hard to do that when you have no idea where you're going. I reeeaaally hope I don't get a scary roommate...
On a similar note, I had managed to shrink my language list for college down to Italian, Russian, and Chinese. But now Farsi and Greek are on it again. And I'd like to take something on French literature in French. And then there's my realization that I can't leave theater behind. I have withdrawls: I miss the booth, I miss the light and sound boards, I miss the atmosphere of the wings, I miss the chaotic green room, I miss the rush that happens around the theater an hour before the show and complaining when only two people stay to help me clean the stage (whether I'm stage crew or not), and (despite the fact that I never considered myself an actor) I miss the warm feel of lights and distorted silouettes of the audience. I need at least a few of those aspects back in my life.
I've been doing some srs bsns studying (aka watching TV) to get my Japanese from proficient to fluent. It's about time. I'll be sad when I have to actively practice kanji and stop being a partially-illiterate American. Ah well.

It's almost my birthday, which means I'm almost legal. Any takers, ladies? ;D Just kidding.
But I'm a bit nervous. My mom a few months ago said to me that we were not going to discuss the "transgender thing" at all until I was legally an adult. That time is-a coming, and I plan to have that discussion. I thought about doing a letter, but I'd rather do it face-to-face, so she can see that I'm absolutely serious. All the same, I'm terrified. The letter is my fall back.

I don't know who knows or cares, but I started a vlog about 4 months ago. I finally have a topic to talk about, but no computer at the moment. I'm such a fail about those things.
Is it weird that I feel lame for having a vlog? I just hope that it can help someone, because one of them helped me a lot. It was the fact that it gave me someone to identify with that was doing well. I feel like my transition is going decently, so I might as well allow someone, even if it's one person, to use my trials and errors to feel more comfortable in their own skin.

Also, birth control hates me. :|

Ciao!

internet, transition, linguistics, college, vlog

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