I'm in deep shit............
College isn't for me. I wasted this semester entirely. I'm going to straight up fail every class. NOT IB fail. FAIL. I haven't been to more than a couple classes since break. I've been so depressed and I can't handle it. now I'm so behind it doesn't matter anymore. I had two exams this week, that I didn't go to. I'm screwed. oddly enough I don't give a shit.
I'm back on my meds but it isn't helping.I'm so moody and getting out of bed is impossible. I swear if I didn't have bodily functions I wouldn't get out of bed. I've not been this depressed since November of senior year. And we know what happened then. There are so many parts of me that don't want to survive this year, and parts that want to. I've truely fallen in love, my plans for this summer are amazing. But at the same time, my future looks bleak beyond that point. I'm smart, or at least I've been told that by standardized tests, but I think I reached my peak intellectual ability sometime in the 11th grade. What do I have to offer the world anymore? An IB diploma.
I'm just waiting on a bus. Trying to catch a train.
I'm back on my meds but it isn't helping.I'm so moody and getting out of bed is impossible. I swear if I didn't have bodily functions I wouldn't get out of bed. I've not been this depressed since November of senior year. And we know what happened then. There are so many parts of me that don't want to survive this year, and parts that want to. I've truely fallen in love, my plans for this summer are amazing. But at the same time, my future looks bleak beyond that point. I'm smart, or at least I've been told that by standardized tests, but I think I reached my peak intellectual ability sometime in the 11th grade. What do I have to offer the world anymore? An IB diploma.
I'm just waiting on a bus. Trying to catch a train.