love is like..
Um so what's new. My hair won't stop falling out so yeah this is a sign that I def went way too far with the dying murdering and perming of my hair. I still have an audacious scar on my belly from my spacer piercing and it has a tan line and is 3 dimensional. My appetite is nothing less than atrocious. If I get hungry for more than an hour I can’t eat much at all. I drank a ton of soda today and yesterday bc it was in my house and we NEVER have soda. Only Poland spring.
I went to Syracuse the past few days to visit Blake. I missed him. The bus rides were atrocious and the ride back took over 13 hours and then one trip took an extra two hours bc a tracker trailer truck rolled off the road or something. I saw what I think was the appalation mtns. One the way there I realized I packed too much yarn so my suitcase couldn’t come up with me I had to put it in the bottom of the bus. From Worcester to Syracuse I sat next to this guy. Um me not realizing pretty much all the seats were taken I was taking my time looking for a seat and hitting people with my bag with a huge smile on my face apologizing every second lol. The guy behind me was like watch I bet you are gonna steal my seat and there were random soda bottles so I didn’t know if that meant seats were taken or not. So I thought I was blocking people so I pulled in the nearest seat and he was like I knew it! So I did take his seat. So after everyone got situated we exchanged a little small talk. I thanked him for holding my luggage for me I don’t know why he did bc it was really heavy and I was leaving it on the seat. He said something like don’t worry about it your hair got me. I of course looking at him noticed before he mentioned anything he had a bit a of a punk style and thought it was chill. So he was obviously saying he liked my hair (it’s purple and turquoise.) so you know if I'm gonna be stuck next to some one for 824 hours I cant sit there quietly so I’m like are you from Syracuse? And he was like “well this is where the conversation ends” and gives me the low down that he will be moving there and this is his last trip there bc he is going to be moving in with this amazing girl and her baby. Well over 4 hours later our convo was still not ended we discussed music who we are with what we are like who we are what we do and a whole lot of stuff. He was a dude with a colorful Mohawk, is into music builds cars etcetc. He was like wow this is such a trip and I grew found of his usage of words like righteous etc lol I don’t hear much people saying that if ever. I guess I was like a mini psychiatrist for him and I asked his good questions and made him think about his currant stresses I think a little differently. I think he thought I was a neat person lol. I am! I asked him what he first thought of me bc we all know we label people I knew he was a punkish person before he told me about his Mohawk days. He actually said I was something a punk cuz of my hair lol which was surprising bc I get called a brat/label whore etc. so yes 5 hours later I sprung my question/accusation “so the conversation didn’t end there. What did that mean?” he was like well “I think you are a very attractive girl, I’m sorry if I sound like an asshole for saying that like that.” I said no that’s cool, and it was def a trip. His name was bj and I wish him all the luck in his future he seemed like a bright awesome person and made my trip to Syracuse delightful. I told him I wasn’t a punk lol bc I am not I am simply an oddball who is a loud and rambunctious talker..
So yes when I finally got to Syracuse it was nice to see Blake. The SUNY campus there, the buildings were beautiful. It snowed lots and I ruined my shoes, I was stupid and forgot to bring jeans. I met his parents and I don’t know how they felt about me his mom said nice things to him about me. But who knows if she was just being nice she was doing dishes when I met her and she shook my hand I was kind of confused. His dad was watching monster trucks on SPEED and they seemed like really nice people. I had a horrible lack of appetite while I was there like I would get ridiculously over hungry and then I would just not be able to eat. We went to outback and instead of eating our food we had a long talk and it was very nice. We were supposed to continue it at his house but we got distracted. His house was cute I guess his brother decorated it. It was very asiany much more than my house too! I liked it a lot. It was like 2 am and we were talking again and I still bawling my eyeballs out. He ended up falling asleep I thought he was mad at me bc he stole all the blankets and passed out and wouldn’t cuddle with me or respond. It hurt my feelings a lot, I don’t know I guess he was just really tired. When I left the next morning I was kind of upset about the night before but didn’t say anything about it. I was fine until we really had to say good bye I couldn’t say anything whenever I mouthed I’ll miss you/I love I would start tearing we hugged and it looked like a scene form a movie of a TV show. You know the one where they are hugging goodbye and it’s all hard to watch and sad bc they are in love. Yes that scene. I got on the bus he called me in tears and I started bawling.
When we are together we have an amazing connection. Absolutely amazing. Its just not the same when we are at a distance though. It is so different to talking to him and be able to touch his hand and see him, than a telephone. I have just never experienced such a thing I have never cried over a guy in my life. What makes it more amazing is because I’m not crying because I’m mad/upset I’m not crying because he makes me. Life makes me.
I mean who would have this we would have amounted to what we have? He must be amazing to have been able to keep me from getting away or being an absolute bitch.
I went to Syracuse the past few days to visit Blake. I missed him. The bus rides were atrocious and the ride back took over 13 hours and then one trip took an extra two hours bc a tracker trailer truck rolled off the road or something. I saw what I think was the appalation mtns. One the way there I realized I packed too much yarn so my suitcase couldn’t come up with me I had to put it in the bottom of the bus. From Worcester to Syracuse I sat next to this guy. Um me not realizing pretty much all the seats were taken I was taking my time looking for a seat and hitting people with my bag with a huge smile on my face apologizing every second lol. The guy behind me was like watch I bet you are gonna steal my seat and there were random soda bottles so I didn’t know if that meant seats were taken or not. So I thought I was blocking people so I pulled in the nearest seat and he was like I knew it! So I did take his seat. So after everyone got situated we exchanged a little small talk. I thanked him for holding my luggage for me I don’t know why he did bc it was really heavy and I was leaving it on the seat. He said something like don’t worry about it your hair got me. I of course looking at him noticed before he mentioned anything he had a bit a of a punk style and thought it was chill. So he was obviously saying he liked my hair (it’s purple and turquoise.) so you know if I'm gonna be stuck next to some one for 824 hours I cant sit there quietly so I’m like are you from Syracuse? And he was like “well this is where the conversation ends” and gives me the low down that he will be moving there and this is his last trip there bc he is going to be moving in with this amazing girl and her baby. Well over 4 hours later our convo was still not ended we discussed music who we are with what we are like who we are what we do and a whole lot of stuff. He was a dude with a colorful Mohawk, is into music builds cars etcetc. He was like wow this is such a trip and I grew found of his usage of words like righteous etc lol I don’t hear much people saying that if ever. I guess I was like a mini psychiatrist for him and I asked his good questions and made him think about his currant stresses I think a little differently. I think he thought I was a neat person lol. I am! I asked him what he first thought of me bc we all know we label people I knew he was a punkish person before he told me about his Mohawk days. He actually said I was something a punk cuz of my hair lol which was surprising bc I get called a brat/label whore etc. so yes 5 hours later I sprung my question/accusation “so the conversation didn’t end there. What did that mean?” he was like well “I think you are a very attractive girl, I’m sorry if I sound like an asshole for saying that like that.” I said no that’s cool, and it was def a trip. His name was bj and I wish him all the luck in his future he seemed like a bright awesome person and made my trip to Syracuse delightful. I told him I wasn’t a punk lol bc I am not I am simply an oddball who is a loud and rambunctious talker..
So yes when I finally got to Syracuse it was nice to see Blake. The SUNY campus there, the buildings were beautiful. It snowed lots and I ruined my shoes, I was stupid and forgot to bring jeans. I met his parents and I don’t know how they felt about me his mom said nice things to him about me. But who knows if she was just being nice she was doing dishes when I met her and she shook my hand I was kind of confused. His dad was watching monster trucks on SPEED and they seemed like really nice people. I had a horrible lack of appetite while I was there like I would get ridiculously over hungry and then I would just not be able to eat. We went to outback and instead of eating our food we had a long talk and it was very nice. We were supposed to continue it at his house but we got distracted. His house was cute I guess his brother decorated it. It was very asiany much more than my house too! I liked it a lot. It was like 2 am and we were talking again and I still bawling my eyeballs out. He ended up falling asleep I thought he was mad at me bc he stole all the blankets and passed out and wouldn’t cuddle with me or respond. It hurt my feelings a lot, I don’t know I guess he was just really tired. When I left the next morning I was kind of upset about the night before but didn’t say anything about it. I was fine until we really had to say good bye I couldn’t say anything whenever I mouthed I’ll miss you/I love I would start tearing we hugged and it looked like a scene form a movie of a TV show. You know the one where they are hugging goodbye and it’s all hard to watch and sad bc they are in love. Yes that scene. I got on the bus he called me in tears and I started bawling.
When we are together we have an amazing connection. Absolutely amazing. Its just not the same when we are at a distance though. It is so different to talking to him and be able to touch his hand and see him, than a telephone. I have just never experienced such a thing I have never cried over a guy in my life. What makes it more amazing is because I’m not crying because I’m mad/upset I’m not crying because he makes me. Life makes me.
I mean who would have this we would have amounted to what we have? He must be amazing to have been able to keep me from getting away or being an absolute bitch.