Something happy, something not so and something inbetween
Jun 23, 2013 13:10
Let me say first that I still don't have any Internet and even gave up the hope to get it back on Monday. I hate it. Hate.Hate. What is this shit -_- I had never problems to admit that I'm a terrible Internet addict, so this is just horrible for me. But luckily my mobile phone still has some (even tho it's terribly slow) and my Dad lives only 5 minutes away, so I just moved to him with my old laptop. Better than nothing, isn't it x_x
So say hello to my rant post. And I really mean it -_- Like I really try to avoid writing any negative things here, just because, but this time I'm really just 'pissed'.
[rant, rant, rant]As most of you heard some baka is probably coming back. (*probably' because I'm a very skeptical person who just doesn't like to believe in anything what wasn't confirmed through JE, because there were already so many rumors which weren't true. (Yeah I'm looking at you you never happened new bangumi and tour >_>) But this time it...sounds legit. And well personally I was always sitting here, thinking that if they won't announced something about him till the end of the year, everyone should just accept that he would never come back and end up...as what ever. Obviously there is some trend for the retiring Johnny's to open their own restaurants. *side eying with farsju* So, I'm *really* happy. Happy for him. SUPER happy for his fans. (Because this is like the most horrible thing what can happen to fans, and I was always so so sorry for everyone of them ugh.) And maybe even a bit happy for myself *g* (If now he decides to take the fucking shades off from time to time. Yeah I'm still hoping you know?) But what I'm really not happy about are all the bitter and angry comments. Srsl people. What.the.hell.is.wrong.with.you.all. Will there be any time where people will just stop hating him for the stuff which happened with KT? Yeah, you can tell me all your pretty arguments of 'he fucked it up', 'he never cared for anyone but himself' 'he hurt them' 'he betrayed the group' YEAH. I never planned to disagree with anything of it (even tho personally I have a different opinion at some points, because I still regard a 'group' more as a kind of a...job, than 'family' and 'sense of the life'. Let's say that I'm just terribly realistic here, and I absolutely understand that your own wishes and goals are more important in the end...) But. This shit happened 3 fucking years ago. 3. 3!!!!!! I doubt that there are many people in this fandom who are even fan for so long. Because most of the time it looked more like someone new joined fandom, saw lots of 'important' people who hated him, the whole general attitude of 'no you're not supposed to talk about him, because he is THE evil' and 'if you don't hate him and fully erase his existence, then you're not a true fan' and automatically joined the party and got the same opinion, just because it looked like mainstream. (Talking about that, this is exactly the reason why personally I'm so happy that the first 4-5 months of my fan being, I wasn't involved in the fandom at all, but spent all the time with watching all their stuff. So when I started to chat with people, I already had a fixed opinion about all things, which no one was ever able to change.)
So really. I just don't get this. The guy was 'dead' for the past 1.5 years, and people still found 100 of different reasons to hate him (most of the time because of the stupid articles in the tabloids and his stans which are...let's admit, some stupid brats with no brain) And the problem is that I don't even see that this is going to stop. Right now, I'm more expecting even more hate, bashing and the great 'omg he is going to flop' jokes. (What he will do of course, like no one can expect him to sell much right now, because he DID fuck up. Too many times to count. So it will take lots and lots of small steps, until he will get his position back.) I'm just...so tired of this. Just really, really tired. Tired of all the drama, of all the fights, of all the side eying, and bashing. Tired of the simply fact that people don't understand what a strong word 'hate' is. You can dislike someone, of course. But hating...is an entirely different story.
But obviously this fandom just never.can.be happy. (And I'm not only talking about the Jin drama here) I have no idea how it looked like in the previous years, because I joined fandom only in the end of 2011, but I really have the feeling that most of the people here just can't be happy. Not for their own sake, not for the sake of the boys. Because they need fights and arguments, because they seem to have...fun with it? I don't know. I was never a person who bashed anyone. And I managed to dislike just a s single guy in the whole JE, and now I'm terribly sorry about it, so you see that I just....don't get this all. People who like him, should be able to do and show this, and people who don't, should just ignore him, it's not that difficult, is it? Right now these are two different fandoms. They don't have ANYTHING to do with each other. And let me just say: No one. Really NO ONE in this whole fuckin world has the right to decide whom you're are allowed to like and whom not. And most definitely they have no right to judge you. His fans were waiting for more than one 1.5 years for news about him, they are allowed to be happy, aren't they? Really. I just want to find a wall, and hit my head against it, because this is just unbelievable. (And how, HOW the fuck did some ppl get the idea, that KT's tour wasn't announced yet, cause of this? Like srsl?? I do get the fears of some, that the press will again ask the five of them about him, but I think this is kinda unavoidable, because it's the PRESS, it always searches for some drama it could write about. But I really don't get the thing with the tour. *headdesk*)
Anyway: I *really* hope that everything of it is true, that he had enough time to think about his future and learn something from his mistakes and...grow up? So please Jin...just...don't fuck up again.
And for me: I hope I will survive all the coming drama without having the urge to jump out off the window. (really, sometimes I ask myself, what the hell am I even doing here x_x)