After "The Endless Night"
[Filtered to people on the mission "The Endless Night"]
*Kira has left the Strike Freedom but he can't look at anyone. Athrun's won't answer from the escape pod, but the sensors at least show something is alive. This unfortunately does not make Kira feel better. He sits in the corner of the Carrier and avoids looking at anyone. In fact, he spends most of his time staring at the floor, clearly ashamed of himself.*
[/Filter]
Why did that happen? I lost it, completely. Maybe the stress? My injury? Just... holding back all this time? The training? I don't know, maybe I can't know. But I killed her, and not because I wanted to protect Berlin, or whoever that Gundam might attack again. It was because I wanted her dead. I haven't wanted someone dead for a long time... have I? How much have I changed from that man who was targeting cockpits looking for the most "efficient solution" to each battle?
I don't know what to do now. I don't even know if just not killing whenever possible is even the right thing anymore. How does one justify deciding who lives or dies? Or maybe I'm missing the point. Maybe one doesn't justify it and just makes that decision anyway...
*Kira has left the Strike Freedom but he can't look at anyone. Athrun's won't answer from the escape pod, but the sensors at least show something is alive. This unfortunately does not make Kira feel better. He sits in the corner of the Carrier and avoids looking at anyone. In fact, he spends most of his time staring at the floor, clearly ashamed of himself.*
[/Filter]
Why did that happen? I lost it, completely. Maybe the stress? My injury? Just... holding back all this time? The training? I don't know, maybe I can't know. But I killed her, and not because I wanted to protect Berlin, or whoever that Gundam might attack again. It was because I wanted her dead. I haven't wanted someone dead for a long time... have I? How much have I changed from that man who was targeting cockpits looking for the most "efficient solution" to each battle?
I don't know what to do now. I don't even know if just not killing whenever possible is even the right thing anymore. How does one justify deciding who lives or dies? Or maybe I'm missing the point. Maybe one doesn't justify it and just makes that decision anyway...