(no subject)
Almost two months have passed. My haunting dreams have also for the most part, passed. But my guilt seems to slowly increase. The should have, could have, would have's keep creeping in my mind. It is maddening. My brother and I have completely trashed our dad's house, but there are still moments when I can't believe he is gone.
The day he passed, I was there with him. I spent the majority of the early afternoon by his side. I got up to leave. I said my good byes and paused, waiting for him to exhale. He died about 5 minutes after I left.
I've learned more about my father after his death then when he was alive. And that doesn't seem right at all to me. And there are still so many unknowns about his life that I know I will never know the answer to.
"I just hope god isn't black. Or else I'm screwed"
- James E. Baldwin
The day he passed, I was there with him. I spent the majority of the early afternoon by his side. I got up to leave. I said my good byes and paused, waiting for him to exhale. He died about 5 minutes after I left.
I've learned more about my father after his death then when he was alive. And that doesn't seem right at all to me. And there are still so many unknowns about his life that I know I will never know the answer to.
"I just hope god isn't black. Or else I'm screwed"
- James E. Baldwin