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VOTING: CHALLENGE 15 - BAD FAN ART
VOTING: CHALLENGE 15 - BAD FAN ART!
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FICS
1.
It was a dark and stormy night. The gleeks were at choir practice because they needed to learn more before they sung they’re finals. Mr Schue came in the door.
“Hi Gleeks, Ive got someone to show to you. This is my sister Mary. She is really awesum and can sing and is good at athletics and she is a famous scientist.”
“Ohh she is so pretty, I wanna be her and sing like her when I am older.” Rachel yelled and everyone nodded.
“Miss Schue can you help us sing good for finals?” Mary said yes and they sang. Later that day they went to finals and because they loved Mary so much she sang at finals to and they one the trophy and Rachel kissed Finn and they were happy and Quinn was happy because she didn’t care about finn anymore so that was ok and then they went home.
The next day the Gleeks wanted to talk to Mary again so they asked Mr Schue were she was but he said he didn’t have a sister. They got confused but Artie stood up and said. “OMG you guys, she was an angel.” Everyone cried tears of joy.
2.
凍心 is the Japanese name I gave this character. The first kanji means frozen, and the second means heart. I added an a at the end to make it sound more like a girl’s name.
Chapter One: The Beginning
Crystal Toshina Mayweather strode down the hallway of McKinley High. Despite being the youngest freshman in her class, and a sudden transfer partway through the semester, she had plans. And with her looks, and unique sense of fashion, no one would be able to stand in her way.
She had transferred earlier that day, directly from her old school-a catholic, all-girls boarding school-so she was still wearing her uniform. But she’d always been a favorite at school ,so none of the teachers minded when she spiced up her uniform. How fortuitous that she happened to come to McKinley on a day when she looked fabulous. Her plaid, pleated school girl skirt was hiked up above her knees to show off her tanned, toned legs. She’s wearing black and white traditional school girl shoes, and knee high dark socks, which draw people’s gaze up her perfect curvy figure.
She had long, flowing hair, and her eyes were orbs of the purest amethyst. She’d been insanely popular at her last school, especially with the boys, which had its ups and downs, although, mostly downs. In spite of all the inconveniences, she’s quite confident that she can land a varsity sports player as a boyfriend.
As she struts confidently down the hallway, the bell rings. Students come pouring out of classrooms, moving swiftly down the corridor. She cuts through them like a swimmer cutting through the water. Yes, she can already sense it. She’ll do great things here.
She feels so sure of herself that she’s not expecting the cold, raspberry slushie to the face, derisive laughter of the jocks coming from behind her as they pass.
One of them turns around to shout, “I was saving this for four-eyes, but you were too good to pass up! Welcome to McKinley, sweetheart!”
It’s fine. She can do this. This is only the beginning.
3.
hiy sed rachle 2 finn i rlly love U wIlL yo mahree meeee
BAM
sudenlee a big metoreee hit de erf n dem every1 was ded
but nt rlly b/c a new planette woz mad so de club waz saph xcept 4 troty mouf cuz e woz trahput in lymah benef de skl
o NOes sed sEnTaYnA his gne were is my bilofed berd!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
DNT WORRREEE SANAYA I LUF UUUUUUUU BRITENY YELD RLLY LOWDLY LYKE A RLLY NOSY CARRRRRR.
OMG i lofe u 222222222222222222222222222
fiN sed omg, qeeen ur so gr8 will u marree me. no, w8, fin woz marrin rayhele. so, yeh. (me n my frends toght dis wold b relly cool cuz i hve dis boi im gunnu maree 4ever and allays and im just like qeen so yeh)
suhdenleee a gr8 beeg bom wnt off bu n1 woz hut b/c thee aliens cme n so every1 was hapee. no, dat happns l8er.
so den fin n rayyychelele get mareeedd but qeeen sez I LUV U n tey al gt whine cowlers n hve lts of lil PCKS cuz tey slepd en a tnt wif de bds 2 cls 2geher n tht mad dem FAAT b4 te stalk cme
n he bbs where gren n hd 4 eyez cuz su mad dem ete speshial plnetee fod
(yeh servifd 3 cuz i ssed he dd)
k thx 4 al thos reeevews I LUF U GUIS
i wnt mor touh so imm noooooooooottttttt dunnne up dte nteellll i gt tennyyy reveeews ppl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4.
Once upon a time there was a pretty pretty princess named Rachel. She was the prettiest princess in the whole universe and sang like a bird and danced like a butterfly. She was locked in a reeeeeeally high tower that didn’t have any doors just a small balconey that she could stand and look out into teh forest. Princess Rachel was put in the tower by the evil King William who did not appreciate who amazing the princesses talent was. Actually he did know her talent and was jealus of how good she was and that’s why he put her in the tower. Tons and tons of the townspeople came out to hear Princess Rachel sing and dance for them, but when King William came out to sing and dance, hardly nobody came. He got so mad that one night he had the princess kidnapped and put in the tower he had especially built to be her prison. Every day, princess Rachel would walk out on to her balcony and sings a sweet tune calling out to any prince who might come out and rescue her. For what seems liek a billion days she sang out too the forest ‘where oh where is my sweet prince? where is the one who will resuce me? please come take me out of this tower so i can sing and dance for my people again. ’ Finally one day when she was singing to a little birdie on her ledge she heard the clippity cloppity of horsie hooves. She looked off into the forest trying to see if sumone was coming. After about a million minutes sumone finally came thru the trees into the clearing. It was a handsome prince upon a pretty white horse. Rachel recognized him from the nayboring town. ‘hello there! could u please help me? the evil king stuck me up in this castle becuz he is jealus of my amazing singing talent.’ The prince called back to her ‘my name is prince Finn. I hear ur song from the forest where I was practicing being really hot. I come to save you from ur big bad tower.’ Squeeling with joy, Princess Rachel moved all the way to the edge of her balcony waiting for her prince to rescue her. Prince Finn jumped on his magik flying carpet and flew up to save the princess. Princess Rachel jumped onto the carpet and she and Prince Finn fly away together to live happily ever after. THE END.
5.
Blain waz a sparcklie alean from plant Fears kurtt waz the moar fablos alen form pLante PLUTOPIA. and thAn ONCE UP ON A TIEM THEY MET. TEH END. *GIGGLES* JK, READERS. TOTESS GOTCHA THAT ITEM. XD :P
K, SO, LIEK THEIR ALEANS, RIGHT? AND LIEK, theyre TOTES IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER. but ykno liek there WORDS ARE M&MS. OMG, SOOOOO DO’NT WANTS TO GIV UP TEH END DO I. XD ONTO TEH FIC
K so heres we gooooo
kkurt liev on the word pultopia but he lurved to shoppe on plant fearce
blane whent to PLUTOPEA to by frute cuz the frute waz totes better on plutopes then liek anyware esle and they wer totes sparklear to cuz liek who doesnt liek sparklie appless and orngas
rite so he when to teh marcket to bye teh sparckliess aplles en teh words adn tehere iz were he saw teh mostest beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeautiful man in all teh plants he waz fablous and he begin to sang
U LUV ME I LURVE U WE’S A BIG HAPPY FAMLY
SIKE! GOTCHA AGAN. *GIGGLES MOAR* KURTY SO DINNIT SING TEH BARNEY SONG. HERES WAT HE DID DO
LET YOU PUT YOU’RE HANDS ON ME AND MY SKINTITE GENES LET YOU BE MY TEENAGE DREEM TONITE
HE COntinud sanging and danceing thruowt teh marcketplaice adn he waz so h-y-p-n-o-t-i-z-ed bye teh sing and danceing man and he dinnnit no wat too doo cuz he liek allmosse dropedd hiz SPAKLIE APPLE.
AND THEN TEY fall in lurve and tey lived happlie evar aftr. TEH END. FUR REALZ.
WAIT. NO. I. LYED.
TEN TEY WEN ON A STERSHEP ADVENTURE
BECAUSE STIR SHIPS R MADE OF TEH AWESUN
AND THEY MAD THR WEIGH TO SERENDITY VALE
and the REDCOATS WERE ALL “YAYYYY!” AND THE ALLYS WER ALL “BOOOO!”
BUT NOBUDY MINDED TOO MUCH CUZ THEIR WAS A SONG AN DANCE ROUTINE.
AND THEN KERMIT TEH FROG RAN AWAY FROM MSS PIGGIE.
AND MSS PIGGIE WAS TOTES LIEK, OH NO YOU DINNIT
AND KERMIT TEH FROG WAZ LIEK OHSNAP
and MIS PIGIE WAZ LIEK FINE, DUED, I GO SEE TEH COOKY MONSTER CUZ HE WILL TOTES SHARE HIZ COOKIES WIT ME
AND KURMIT WAS ALL SADFACE
AND COOKIE MONSTER TOTES DID SHARE HIZ COOKIES WIT MSS PIGGIE AND TEY LIVED HAPPS EVAR AFTER
AND KURMIT DIDN’T. TAT’S WAT HE GETS FOR LEEVING MSS. PIGGIE.
6.
a most excellent day
-------------------
like so rachel was walking down the corridor of mckinley high and she saw brittany leaning against the lockers and brittany was all hi rachel how are you? and rachel said well hi there brittany i am worried about santana and all her lesbian problems. i want to be there for her but i am jewish and i don't understand lesbians. well brittany says sometimes im a lesbian and sometimes im not its like when sometimes your eating a sandwich n sometimes im eating ice cream. i like sandwiches and icecream said rachel. me too says brittany. i can make out with you if that would help, brittany added. oh that would says rachel and so there lips met. i didn't know, rachel says. its good right says brittany. i didn't know i was in love with you, says rachel. i didn't know i love you too, says brittany. will you marry me? asks rachel. oh yes! yes! says brittany. let's buy a house and a dog and paint the door pink. yes let's said rachel. so they go into glee club and decide on the three steps there to not tell everyone but rachel can't help it so she snogs brittany like in the middle of the floor in front of everyone. brittany sings martina mcbride's "I love you" and has all the lyrics and the dance steps down even though she only heard the song that moment. guys it's a surprise for you, says rachel, but brittany and i are in love and we are getting married. no no says finn we are meant to be together forever. whoa what about me says quinn we are meant to be. oh yeah says finn and he and quinn make out passionately and rachel and brittany make out and kurt just takes pics of it all and puts in on facebook and myspace but not bebo because bebo is a ho lololololol.
7.
it was a bright sunny day, the birds were chirping and Rachel was so happy she could just sing! (irony lol) Today she was going to get finn back for good, she had it all planned out and it was failproof. She ran into the choir room where there were 12 red chairs (one for each of the members of new directions). The chair she sat on, in the last row, second to the left, felt more comfortable than usual. And there was no one else there yet. Suddenly finn walked in and didn’t look at her.
“Hi finn! You’re looking very muscular today” she exclaimed. But Finn was smarter than she gave him credit for, and he immediately noticed this was an attempt at flirting. “Sorry Rachel but you know I’ve chosen Quinn over you now and I don’t want to do this anymore. Please don’t talk to me for the rest of the day”
Rachel sat their depressed. Phase one of her plan had already failed and she couldn’t carry out the rest of her phases if she couldn’t talk to him for the rest of the day! She would have to try again tomorrow than.
The next day Rachel went 2 school in a heavy downpour of rain, she was sad because she couldn’t think of a new plan last night and clearly she was never going to get finn back ever. “the weather these past couple of days seems like a metaphor for my mood.” Rachel thought to herself, as metaphors were important to her.
In the choir room she sat on the same uncomfortable plastic chair as yesterday. Puck came strolling in and patted her on the head.
“Rachel I’ve been wanting to ask you something for a long time now” he said “your kind of cool and I like the fact that your a jew like me, so will u go out with me?”
Rachel’s mouth went into a ‘o’ shape, so if she had been represented in smiley form, she would’ve looked like this :-o
“yes of course!” she said. If she couldn’t have finn then puck was probably the next best thing. She was feeling much more happier for the rest of the day.
But by the end of the day puck and Rachel broke up again because everyone was bored of them being a couple. This was normal, in glee club relationships never lasted for too long.
Everthing was going to be all rainbows and unicorns though- Jesse st james would be coming back to Mckinely tomorrow and he would definitely go out with Rachel again now that he wasn’t in Vocal adrenaline anymore ^.^ even if he said no, she could always try for artie or sam because there both single now. Her future looked very hopeful.
The end.
…or is it?
8.
A QuinnSongFic: You're A God
I've got to be honest
I think you know
We're covered in lies and that's OK
There's somewhere beyond this I know
But I hope I can find the words to say
On the outside, Quinn was good. She had trained to be just that all of her life. Good. Pretty, Smart but not too smart, assertive but not too assertive to boys and ambitious but not at the expense of her popularity, and though she didn't know what those last two meant, exactly, she was doing a pretty damn good job at keeping up appearances. If you live long enough as oe thing, thats what you become right? like Pinnochio or that old wives tale about the wind changing on the boy pulling a silly face.
Never again no
No never again
Then came rachel berry. Quinn Fabray hated Rachel Berry.
'Cause you're a god
And I am not
And I just thought
That you would know
You're a god
And I am not
And I just thought
I'd let you go
Not because she wanted her boyfriend (as if that would ever happen) and not because she was ugly, because god, who likes ugly people? Or because of her screechy voice or demanding personality. But for one jarring reason.
But I've been unable
To put you down
I'm still learning things I ought to know by now
It's under the table so
I need something more to show somehow
Rachel Berry didn't pretend. Rachel Berry rose above that while sacrficing what she could be all for her stupid dreams of grandeur. But, All the same, Rachel Berry didn't pretend. She did not pour her energy reserves into maintining the portrait of someone she was not.
I've got to be honest
I think you know
We're covered in lies and that's OK
There's somewhere beyond this I know
But I hope I can find the words to say
Never again no
No never again
And Quinn Fabray, in her heart of hearts, thought that was okay.
Maybe even admirable.
Little did she know that Rachel thought exactly the same.
9.
Rachel couldnt belive her eyes when she saw them together.artieand mercedes, just laughing + hanging all over each other. She marched up to them and said 'DoN't you guys have any decency?!!artie i thought you luvd britney!" artie just laughed and waved her off. "You don't get it rachel, theres something about us u need to know,"Mercedes said."I've always liked artie.and to be honest,i used to dream of ways to break uphim and brittny but now idont need to anymore. so glad." they leaned in close and rubbed noses with each other,and rachel just gaped in horror and disbelief before storming into the glee room;"you guys,artie and mercedes are together!!!!!" she exclaimed loudly."We know rachel,"Santana said as she kissed mike on the lips."OMG, are you guys together toO?!"It was a while ago. We got a little too drunk off of wine coolers at your party and we did a little something inyour room,sorry. Not." "Anyway, point us, Im pregnant now and Mikes teh father." Mike just shrugged and they kept kissing. "And Im the godfather," Brittany said, butting in. Rachel just stared at everyone, not believing what she was hearing. "Wait until i tell Mistr Schu" she said. Just then he walked in,smiling and proudly showing off his latest vest; it was cotton and shocker! It was gray-and-black-patterned. "Mr Schue I think
the gleeclub has gone insane!" rachEl said.
Its okay Rachel", said Will, "Its spring so we're gettign all grooovy.Speaking of which glee club,groovy is this weeks theme! lets partYYyyy!"
10.
Title: Four Times Kurt New Directions and Blaine Warbler Were Totally Awesome and One Time They Were Also Totally Awesome
Rated: PG-13 for rainbows and awesomeness and dolphins and hearts and stuff
Once upon a time, Blaine Warbler and Kurt New Directions met. And it was totally awesome. Because Blaine Warbler was totally a teenage dream and Kurt New Directions was like, "You're totally awesome." Except that Blaine Warbler was all stupid and was like, "You're totally awesome too, but like that." And so Kurt New Directions and Blaine Warbler were friends. And Blaine Warbler did things like sing duets with Kurt New Directions and talk about sex with him, but he really liked this guy who worked at the Gap who had funny hair. And Kurt New Directions was sad, because he'd been drawing hearts that said "Kurt + Blaine" in them, but Blaine Warbler was, like, all oblivious. Until one day, Kurt New Directions told Blaine Warbler that he wasn't so totally awesome and also Kurt New Directions' bird died. And then Blaine Warbler was like, "Kurt Nude Erections you're totally awesome." And then they made out. And then fanservice was totally cock-blocked.
So now, they're all living happily ever after. And Blaine Warbler totally bought Kurt New Directions a new bird. And they named it Domingo. And Kurt New Directions went back to his old school and Blaine Warbler went with him, which made him Blaine New Directions. And they kiss in the hallways and no one cares. Because they're totally awesome. They eat Red Vines together and watch Harry Potter and share sweet dolphin kisses and it's totally awesome. And they sing together, but Kurt New Directions gets more solos and Blaine New Directions gets less. But fanservice still gets totally cock-blocked. Totally.
The end.
11.
Puck walked into the room. It was the glee room. Lauren was there. So was everyone else. In the glee club. And Mr. Schuester was there too. He walked up to Lauren. His lady-love. He dropped to one knee and said, sweetly, “Lauren, my love, my one and only, my everything, my sweet sweet butterball turkey, will you be my everything forever and be my baby mama and be the Queen Bee and chez Puck?”
“You mean and let the Puckzilla impregnate me?!” Lauren exclaimed amazedly. “Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!!” she said with stars in his eyes. They shone so brightly she was momentarily blinded.
Kurt said ironically, “What a crazy random happenstance!! Blaine just propposssed to me last night!! It can be a double wedding!” Lauren squealed delightedly at this.
“Sir Tubbington asked me to marry him. The ceremony is tomorrow. None of you are invited because you don’t support our love,” Brittany said succinctly.
Rachel took Kurt’s and Lauren’s hands and said brightly “I’ll plan everything!! It will be the wedding I, um, you guys always dreamed of!!” She flounced off muttering crazily about bedazzled centerpieces, sequins, rainbows, and unicorns.
Sue barged in huffily and said “I heard your band of miscreants is planning some incestuous union. Also, how do you manage to hold up your head with all that product in your hair?” She kissed Schue lovingly on the mouth before exiting stage left.
Will went to Emma’s office and found her and Holly Holliday making out. She turned to him and said besottedly “Thank you ever so much for bringing us together, Will! Only the true heartbreak of losing your love could have bonded us like this.”
April turned to Will with a bottle of Jack in hand and said drunkenly “Finally, a real party at this place! And it started without me!”
“I thought you were going to dry out,” Will said accusingly.
“Are we still on for that three way with Sue tonight, Willybear?” April said beseechingly.
Will turned over in bed.
12.
Sweet Home Ohio
"Cleetus Pierce-Lopez, get your behind out here right now!" yelled a very pregnant Brittany.
"What did I do this time, Mama?" whined a boy no more than 7 years old.
"Why does Puck have a mohawk?" Puck, their dog, wagged his tail happily when he heard his name called.
"Well I thought I'd help him find a girlfriend, and Ma always says chicks dig badasses."
Brittany sighed, "Your Ma says a lot of things, but that doesn't mean you can go around doing things like this."
"Doing what?"
Brittany turned to her wife who had joined them on the porch.
Santana, gently wrapping her arms around Brittany's belly, peered at her son's work of "art".
"That's badass." She says with a grin.
Brittany sighed again, trying to contain a smile. "What am I gonna do with you two?"
"I don't know, but I do know that I needs me a beer. So get, woman!" Santana laughs swatting Brittany on the ass.
Brittany fakes an angry glare, "And you'll be sleepin' in the doghouse with Puck tonight." With a flip of her hair, struts inside.
Santana and Cleetus share a look before bursting into laughter.
Through his giggles, Cleetus asks his Ma, "Do you think she's serious?"
Santana stops laughing.
"I hope no-" she's interrupted by Brittany who waltz outside, arms loaded with bedding.
"Here you go sugah', have a good night." She pecks Santana's cheek before she goes back in.
Santana looks from the sheets and pillow in her arms to Puck who has a doggy grin.
"What are you lookin' at flea bag?" She glares at the dog.
Puck just gives her a little bark before chasing after the man-child that gave him such a kickass hair cut.
13.
***WARNING: ADULT CONTENT***
Fin and Jessy glares at eachother as Coach Slyvester drugged them out of the prom by there shirt collars. Once she had toss them on there asses outside of the skool thay were at eachother’s throtes again. Fin lunged at Jessy just as he was attempting to get up of off the ground and nocked him back down again. Rolling onto the grass arms were flying everywear doing anything thay could to strike or pull or scratch wearever thay could.
Chest collision with chest. Arms rap around arms. Legs tangle with legs. And groin grinds against groin and befour either of them could think about it thay were both hard from the friction thay had created.
As soon as thay realised it thay both frozen. Jessy hover over Fin whose hands were up and clutched in Jessy’s shirt. Neither of them make a sound. Both were holding there breathe trying not to make any suddin movements eyes lock on eachother.
Thay hold this position four quite a while thinking that if their was no more friction that there problem would just goes away and thay could pretends that it didn’t happin. Of corse neither of them thot that seperating mite also work.
Afters a few very long minutes there was movements. Jessy slowly lowers his face towards Fin’s and rite as there lips are about to tuch thay were both hit from every direction with waters. Laughing thay just ignored it and close the gap between them. Lips crashed twogether. Fingers tangled in hare. Hip thrusted against hip.
A wile laiter as Dave was come out of the skool the last thing he expects two see was Fin and Rachil’s date rolling around in the grasses, soaked frum the sprinklers, lips attacheded, and shirts practicality hanging of off them. He felts his cock twitchs with desire as he sees them rut against eachother.
Half of hims wanted to run frum fear of them discuvering how much this was turned him on and the other half wants so badley to joins them. Ands befour he knew it he was on the ground with them thankfuls that both boys were two cot up in the moments two protest.
It woulds have been a sight two be saw if anyones had come out over the next twenty minuts. From a distanced thay were just a mass of arms and legs and exposed fleshes. Groping, grasping, clutching eachother. And when thay were finish thay all gets up without a word, cleans themselves up as much as thay could and walks away in different directions. Their are no parting glances. No promises of secret. Just three boys walking seperately into the nite, shockded grins on there faces and cum stains on there pants.
14.
Glee club was fun. Sam didn’t think he’d like it at first. But he did. And he really liked the dancing. He liked it most when he danced with Kurt. He tried to kiss the girls in the club. But he did not really like it. He liked dancing with Kurt. One day he and Kurt sang a duet. Sam couldn’t be quiet anymore. After Glee club, he talked to Kurt. “I love you.” Sam said. “I love you too” Kurt said. They were together forever. They got married and Kurt realized he was pregnant. They had twelve kids and all the girls were jealous.
Jesse was back. Rachel was happy. Sue was happy that Rachel was happy. Sue could destroy her. And sad Rachel meant bad Glee club. So then Sue would be happy. Jesse came to Sues house. “I did what you told me” he said. “Good” Sue said. This time she would destroy Glee club. It had taken her two years. She had created Jesse. Her best invention ever. He was a robot. He was made to destroy Glee club. Sue had made him with NASA. “Come here Jesse.” Sue said. Jesse walked over. She plugged him into the wall and laughed loudly. “Glee club is over” she said.
15.
TITTLE: LANDS
RITER: JEZEBEL DARLING (my soodname, shuddup)
SUMREE: STUFF HAPPENS ON TEH LANDS
UNCE APON A TIEM, KURTSIE WAS A YOUNICORN. HE WAZ A magicl uncorn and blane twaz a prinz nd the prinz roold all teh land even teh LAND OF TEH UNCOORNS AND TEH LAND OF TEH OONCORNS WAZ MAgcal az wel.
kurtsie teh uncorn waz stoped at teh river. teh magcal river. and teh magcal river waz MAGCAL. IT SPARCKLDD AND GLESTNED AND SHON LIEK A SUN ON A RANIE DAY. and tehre waz fihies in teh magcal river.
kurtsie stopped.
THE PRINZE FORMLY NOWN AS POPPER BLANE. STOPPD.
AT TEH GIANT TREE STOD A betuiful woman pegsus. she had shimry wings taht wERe liek dimands. eyes liek dimands. purple dimonds. cuz she totes had pretty purple eys.
she waz tane an tal AND her long blon hare waz long. it reechd her waste and blow in teh wend.
liek a leef blooing in teh brese.
her name twaz JEZEBEL, um, BELLE. AN seh waz teh mose beeteful gurl in teh word.
her dogs naim waz IMARTIK. SHE was tall and had wite wings cuz she was a magcal dog. seh had teel furz and long eers wen seh wagd her tale teh hole vaily shoock she waz a baddass dawg hoo garded over JEZEBELLE SHE WAZ SO AWSUM she gots a croun teh croun waz gold and sliver and waz covered in dawg prin shap dimends and ottter gewls.
and so kurtsie teh uncorn and teh PRINZ FORMLY NOWN AZ PAPPER BLANE MET AT TEH MAGCAL RIvr
tey kissed
tey loved
tey hugGD
tey livd haps evar after.
P.S. BELLE IZ TOTES NOT A MARrySUE. SHUDDUP
NAO WIT BONNUs eplog:
K, SO LIEK 9 MONTS AFTER KURTSIE AN TEH PRINS FORMLY NOWN AZ PAOPER BLANE met OOPSIES KURTSIE WAZ Totes preggers.
SO tey rushed kurtsie to ol’ doc brown on teh mowntansid
out pooped a kid
tey namd it SUEFINNQUINNRACHELSANTANAPUCKLAURENBRITTANYFIGGINSTHEPINKDAGGERTINAMIKEARTIEBURTMERCEDESEMMATERRISUZYSAMJACOBBECKYDAVEMATTHENRIBRENDABRADBEISTEHOLLYKENWESDAVIDTHADWARBLERSUNSHINESHELBYDUSTINGRACEJESSEBRYANHOWARDJOSHOLIVIAWURODANDREAJEANDRSHANEKENDRACARLCAROLAPRILWILL HUMMEL-WARBLER.
TEY CALLED HER NEIL
imartik was teh godmather
neil cam out of kurtsie wit a baddass musstash an caim out signin and dancin
MACARENA, MACARENA, MACARENA, HEY MACARENA, he sing
and he dancd teh elctric slide
HE WALKED, CUZ HES BADDASS AD TOTES WALKED AT BIRT, round wit a toy masheen gun gong POW POW BANG BANG
HE SING, WANT TAT BOOM BOOM POW
ANd daneced teh can can wyle doin it
an he slaide teh dragon an won teh land. tee end.
16.
Onse apon a time a gurl named Quin grew long blondee hare like the Rapunzel chick and it was so lovey so she walkid outside and the birds sang bcuz she so beutiful and Raychel walked out 2 so Quin was like 'hi jew nose' and raychel was all 'y u so mean tho' and Quin appologized and they bekame frands 4 life!!!! also Raychel dunsent have blondee hair but she has a gud singin voyce so i guess its ok lol anywa the end.
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Deadline: May 22nd, at 11:59pm, EST. (Time Left)
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FICS
1.
It was a dark and stormy night. The gleeks were at choir practice because they needed to learn more before they sung they’re finals. Mr Schue came in the door.
“Hi Gleeks, Ive got someone to show to you. This is my sister Mary. She is really awesum and can sing and is good at athletics and she is a famous scientist.”
“Ohh she is so pretty, I wanna be her and sing like her when I am older.” Rachel yelled and everyone nodded.
“Miss Schue can you help us sing good for finals?” Mary said yes and they sang. Later that day they went to finals and because they loved Mary so much she sang at finals to and they one the trophy and Rachel kissed Finn and they were happy and Quinn was happy because she didn’t care about finn anymore so that was ok and then they went home.
The next day the Gleeks wanted to talk to Mary again so they asked Mr Schue were she was but he said he didn’t have a sister. They got confused but Artie stood up and said. “OMG you guys, she was an angel.” Everyone cried tears of joy.
2.
凍心 is the Japanese name I gave this character. The first kanji means frozen, and the second means heart. I added an a at the end to make it sound more like a girl’s name.
Chapter One: The Beginning
Crystal Toshina Mayweather strode down the hallway of McKinley High. Despite being the youngest freshman in her class, and a sudden transfer partway through the semester, she had plans. And with her looks, and unique sense of fashion, no one would be able to stand in her way.
She had transferred earlier that day, directly from her old school-a catholic, all-girls boarding school-so she was still wearing her uniform. But she’d always been a favorite at school ,so none of the teachers minded when she spiced up her uniform. How fortuitous that she happened to come to McKinley on a day when she looked fabulous. Her plaid, pleated school girl skirt was hiked up above her knees to show off her tanned, toned legs. She’s wearing black and white traditional school girl shoes, and knee high dark socks, which draw people’s gaze up her perfect curvy figure.
She had long, flowing hair, and her eyes were orbs of the purest amethyst. She’d been insanely popular at her last school, especially with the boys, which had its ups and downs, although, mostly downs. In spite of all the inconveniences, she’s quite confident that she can land a varsity sports player as a boyfriend.
As she struts confidently down the hallway, the bell rings. Students come pouring out of classrooms, moving swiftly down the corridor. She cuts through them like a swimmer cutting through the water. Yes, she can already sense it. She’ll do great things here.
She feels so sure of herself that she’s not expecting the cold, raspberry slushie to the face, derisive laughter of the jocks coming from behind her as they pass.
One of them turns around to shout, “I was saving this for four-eyes, but you were too good to pass up! Welcome to McKinley, sweetheart!”
It’s fine. She can do this. This is only the beginning.
3.
hiy sed rachle 2 finn i rlly love U wIlL yo mahree meeee
BAM
sudenlee a big metoreee hit de erf n dem every1 was ded
but nt rlly b/c a new planette woz mad so de club waz saph xcept 4 troty mouf cuz e woz trahput in lymah benef de skl
o NOes sed sEnTaYnA his gne were is my bilofed berd!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
DNT WORRREEE SANAYA I LUF UUUUUUUU BRITENY YELD RLLY LOWDLY LYKE A RLLY NOSY CARRRRRR.
OMG i lofe u 222222222222222222222222222
fiN sed omg, qeeen ur so gr8 will u marree me. no, w8, fin woz marrin rayhele. so, yeh. (me n my frends toght dis wold b relly cool cuz i hve dis boi im gunnu maree 4ever and allays and im just like qeen so yeh)
suhdenleee a gr8 beeg bom wnt off bu n1 woz hut b/c thee aliens cme n so every1 was hapee. no, dat happns l8er.
so den fin n rayyychelele get mareeedd but qeeen sez I LUV U n tey al gt whine cowlers n hve lts of lil PCKS cuz tey slepd en a tnt wif de bds 2 cls 2geher n tht mad dem FAAT b4 te stalk cme
n he bbs where gren n hd 4 eyez cuz su mad dem ete speshial plnetee fod
(yeh servifd 3 cuz i ssed he dd)
k thx 4 al thos reeevews I LUF U GUIS
i wnt mor touh so imm noooooooooottttttt dunnne up dte nteellll i gt tennyyy reveeews ppl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
4.
Once upon a time there was a pretty pretty princess named Rachel. She was the prettiest princess in the whole universe and sang like a bird and danced like a butterfly. She was locked in a reeeeeeally high tower that didn’t have any doors just a small balconey that she could stand and look out into teh forest. Princess Rachel was put in the tower by the evil King William who did not appreciate who amazing the princesses talent was. Actually he did know her talent and was jealus of how good she was and that’s why he put her in the tower. Tons and tons of the townspeople came out to hear Princess Rachel sing and dance for them, but when King William came out to sing and dance, hardly nobody came. He got so mad that one night he had the princess kidnapped and put in the tower he had especially built to be her prison. Every day, princess Rachel would walk out on to her balcony and sings a sweet tune calling out to any prince who might come out and rescue her. For what seems liek a billion days she sang out too the forest ‘where oh where is my sweet prince? where is the one who will resuce me? please come take me out of this tower so i can sing and dance for my people again. ’ Finally one day when she was singing to a little birdie on her ledge she heard the clippity cloppity of horsie hooves. She looked off into the forest trying to see if sumone was coming. After about a million minutes sumone finally came thru the trees into the clearing. It was a handsome prince upon a pretty white horse. Rachel recognized him from the nayboring town. ‘hello there! could u please help me? the evil king stuck me up in this castle becuz he is jealus of my amazing singing talent.’ The prince called back to her ‘my name is prince Finn. I hear ur song from the forest where I was practicing being really hot. I come to save you from ur big bad tower.’ Squeeling with joy, Princess Rachel moved all the way to the edge of her balcony waiting for her prince to rescue her. Prince Finn jumped on his magik flying carpet and flew up to save the princess. Princess Rachel jumped onto the carpet and she and Prince Finn fly away together to live happily ever after. THE END.
5.
Blain waz a sparcklie alean from plant Fears kurtt waz the moar fablos alen form pLante PLUTOPIA. and thAn ONCE UP ON A TIEM THEY MET. TEH END. *GIGGLES* JK, READERS. TOTESS GOTCHA THAT ITEM. XD :P
K, SO, LIEK THEIR ALEANS, RIGHT? AND LIEK, theyre TOTES IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER. but ykno liek there WORDS ARE M&MS. OMG, SOOOOO DO’NT WANTS TO GIV UP TEH END DO I. XD ONTO TEH FIC
K so heres we gooooo
kkurt liev on the word pultopia but he lurved to shoppe on plant fearce
blane whent to PLUTOPEA to by frute cuz the frute waz totes better on plutopes then liek anyware esle and they wer totes sparklear to cuz liek who doesnt liek sparklie appless and orngas
rite so he when to teh marcket to bye teh sparckliess aplles en teh words adn tehere iz were he saw teh mostest beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeautiful man in all teh plants he waz fablous and he begin to sang
U LUV ME I LURVE U WE’S A BIG HAPPY FAMLY
SIKE! GOTCHA AGAN. *GIGGLES MOAR* KURTY SO DINNIT SING TEH BARNEY SONG. HERES WAT HE DID DO
LET YOU PUT YOU’RE HANDS ON ME AND MY SKINTITE GENES LET YOU BE MY TEENAGE DREEM TONITE
HE COntinud sanging and danceing thruowt teh marcketplaice adn he waz so h-y-p-n-o-t-i-z-ed bye teh sing and danceing man and he dinnnit no wat too doo cuz he liek allmosse dropedd hiz SPAKLIE APPLE.
AND THEN TEY fall in lurve and tey lived happlie evar aftr. TEH END. FUR REALZ.
WAIT. NO. I. LYED.
TEN TEY WEN ON A STERSHEP ADVENTURE
BECAUSE STIR SHIPS R MADE OF TEH AWESUN
AND THEY MAD THR WEIGH TO SERENDITY VALE
and the REDCOATS WERE ALL “YAYYYY!” AND THE ALLYS WER ALL “BOOOO!”
BUT NOBUDY MINDED TOO MUCH CUZ THEIR WAS A SONG AN DANCE ROUTINE.
AND THEN KERMIT TEH FROG RAN AWAY FROM MSS PIGGIE.
AND MSS PIGGIE WAS TOTES LIEK, OH NO YOU DINNIT
AND KERMIT TEH FROG WAZ LIEK OHSNAP
and MIS PIGIE WAZ LIEK FINE, DUED, I GO SEE TEH COOKY MONSTER CUZ HE WILL TOTES SHARE HIZ COOKIES WIT ME
AND KURMIT WAS ALL SADFACE
AND COOKIE MONSTER TOTES DID SHARE HIZ COOKIES WIT MSS PIGGIE AND TEY LIVED HAPPS EVAR AFTER
AND KURMIT DIDN’T. TAT’S WAT HE GETS FOR LEEVING MSS. PIGGIE.
6.
a most excellent day
-------------------
like so rachel was walking down the corridor of mckinley high and she saw brittany leaning against the lockers and brittany was all hi rachel how are you? and rachel said well hi there brittany i am worried about santana and all her lesbian problems. i want to be there for her but i am jewish and i don't understand lesbians. well brittany says sometimes im a lesbian and sometimes im not its like when sometimes your eating a sandwich n sometimes im eating ice cream. i like sandwiches and icecream said rachel. me too says brittany. i can make out with you if that would help, brittany added. oh that would says rachel and so there lips met. i didn't know, rachel says. its good right says brittany. i didn't know i was in love with you, says rachel. i didn't know i love you too, says brittany. will you marry me? asks rachel. oh yes! yes! says brittany. let's buy a house and a dog and paint the door pink. yes let's said rachel. so they go into glee club and decide on the three steps there to not tell everyone but rachel can't help it so she snogs brittany like in the middle of the floor in front of everyone. brittany sings martina mcbride's "I love you" and has all the lyrics and the dance steps down even though she only heard the song that moment. guys it's a surprise for you, says rachel, but brittany and i are in love and we are getting married. no no says finn we are meant to be together forever. whoa what about me says quinn we are meant to be. oh yeah says finn and he and quinn make out passionately and rachel and brittany make out and kurt just takes pics of it all and puts in on facebook and myspace but not bebo because bebo is a ho lololololol.
7.
it was a bright sunny day, the birds were chirping and Rachel was so happy she could just sing! (irony lol) Today she was going to get finn back for good, she had it all planned out and it was failproof. She ran into the choir room where there were 12 red chairs (one for each of the members of new directions). The chair she sat on, in the last row, second to the left, felt more comfortable than usual. And there was no one else there yet. Suddenly finn walked in and didn’t look at her.
“Hi finn! You’re looking very muscular today” she exclaimed. But Finn was smarter than she gave him credit for, and he immediately noticed this was an attempt at flirting. “Sorry Rachel but you know I’ve chosen Quinn over you now and I don’t want to do this anymore. Please don’t talk to me for the rest of the day”
Rachel sat their depressed. Phase one of her plan had already failed and she couldn’t carry out the rest of her phases if she couldn’t talk to him for the rest of the day! She would have to try again tomorrow than.
The next day Rachel went 2 school in a heavy downpour of rain, she was sad because she couldn’t think of a new plan last night and clearly she was never going to get finn back ever. “the weather these past couple of days seems like a metaphor for my mood.” Rachel thought to herself, as metaphors were important to her.
In the choir room she sat on the same uncomfortable plastic chair as yesterday. Puck came strolling in and patted her on the head.
“Rachel I’ve been wanting to ask you something for a long time now” he said “your kind of cool and I like the fact that your a jew like me, so will u go out with me?”
Rachel’s mouth went into a ‘o’ shape, so if she had been represented in smiley form, she would’ve looked like this :-o
“yes of course!” she said. If she couldn’t have finn then puck was probably the next best thing. She was feeling much more happier for the rest of the day.
But by the end of the day puck and Rachel broke up again because everyone was bored of them being a couple. This was normal, in glee club relationships never lasted for too long.
Everthing was going to be all rainbows and unicorns though- Jesse st james would be coming back to Mckinely tomorrow and he would definitely go out with Rachel again now that he wasn’t in Vocal adrenaline anymore ^.^ even if he said no, she could always try for artie or sam because there both single now. Her future looked very hopeful.
The end.
…or is it?
8.
A QuinnSongFic: You're A God
I've got to be honest
I think you know
We're covered in lies and that's OK
There's somewhere beyond this I know
But I hope I can find the words to say
On the outside, Quinn was good. She had trained to be just that all of her life. Good. Pretty, Smart but not too smart, assertive but not too assertive to boys and ambitious but not at the expense of her popularity, and though she didn't know what those last two meant, exactly, she was doing a pretty damn good job at keeping up appearances. If you live long enough as oe thing, thats what you become right? like Pinnochio or that old wives tale about the wind changing on the boy pulling a silly face.
Never again no
No never again
Then came rachel berry. Quinn Fabray hated Rachel Berry.
'Cause you're a god
And I am not
And I just thought
That you would know
You're a god
And I am not
And I just thought
I'd let you go
Not because she wanted her boyfriend (as if that would ever happen) and not because she was ugly, because god, who likes ugly people? Or because of her screechy voice or demanding personality. But for one jarring reason.
But I've been unable
To put you down
I'm still learning things I ought to know by now
It's under the table so
I need something more to show somehow
Rachel Berry didn't pretend. Rachel Berry rose above that while sacrficing what she could be all for her stupid dreams of grandeur. But, All the same, Rachel Berry didn't pretend. She did not pour her energy reserves into maintining the portrait of someone she was not.
I've got to be honest
I think you know
We're covered in lies and that's OK
There's somewhere beyond this I know
But I hope I can find the words to say
Never again no
No never again
And Quinn Fabray, in her heart of hearts, thought that was okay.
Maybe even admirable.
Little did she know that Rachel thought exactly the same.
9.
Rachel couldnt belive her eyes when she saw them together.artieand mercedes, just laughing + hanging all over each other. She marched up to them and said 'DoN't you guys have any decency?!!artie i thought you luvd britney!" artie just laughed and waved her off. "You don't get it rachel, theres something about us u need to know,"Mercedes said."I've always liked artie.and to be honest,i used to dream of ways to break uphim and brittny but now idont need to anymore. so glad." they leaned in close and rubbed noses with each other,and rachel just gaped in horror and disbelief before storming into the glee room;"you guys,artie and mercedes are together!!!!!" she exclaimed loudly."We know rachel,"Santana said as she kissed mike on the lips."OMG, are you guys together toO?!"It was a while ago. We got a little too drunk off of wine coolers at your party and we did a little something inyour room,sorry. Not." "Anyway, point us, Im pregnant now and Mikes teh father." Mike just shrugged and they kept kissing. "And Im the godfather," Brittany said, butting in. Rachel just stared at everyone, not believing what she was hearing. "Wait until i tell Mistr Schu" she said. Just then he walked in,smiling and proudly showing off his latest vest; it was cotton and shocker! It was gray-and-black-patterned. "Mr Schue I think
the gleeclub has gone insane!" rachEl said.
Its okay Rachel", said Will, "Its spring so we're gettign all grooovy.Speaking of which glee club,groovy is this weeks theme! lets partYYyyy!"
10.
Title: Four Times Kurt New Directions and Blaine Warbler Were Totally Awesome and One Time They Were Also Totally Awesome
Rated: PG-13 for rainbows and awesomeness and dolphins and hearts and stuff
Once upon a time, Blaine Warbler and Kurt New Directions met. And it was totally awesome. Because Blaine Warbler was totally a teenage dream and Kurt New Directions was like, "You're totally awesome." Except that Blaine Warbler was all stupid and was like, "You're totally awesome too, but like that." And so Kurt New Directions and Blaine Warbler were friends. And Blaine Warbler did things like sing duets with Kurt New Directions and talk about sex with him, but he really liked this guy who worked at the Gap who had funny hair. And Kurt New Directions was sad, because he'd been drawing hearts that said "Kurt + Blaine" in them, but Blaine Warbler was, like, all oblivious. Until one day, Kurt New Directions told Blaine Warbler that he wasn't so totally awesome and also Kurt New Directions' bird died. And then Blaine Warbler was like, "Kurt Nude Erections you're totally awesome." And then they made out. And then fanservice was totally cock-blocked.
So now, they're all living happily ever after. And Blaine Warbler totally bought Kurt New Directions a new bird. And they named it Domingo. And Kurt New Directions went back to his old school and Blaine Warbler went with him, which made him Blaine New Directions. And they kiss in the hallways and no one cares. Because they're totally awesome. They eat Red Vines together and watch Harry Potter and share sweet dolphin kisses and it's totally awesome. And they sing together, but Kurt New Directions gets more solos and Blaine New Directions gets less. But fanservice still gets totally cock-blocked. Totally.
The end.
11.
Puck walked into the room. It was the glee room. Lauren was there. So was everyone else. In the glee club. And Mr. Schuester was there too. He walked up to Lauren. His lady-love. He dropped to one knee and said, sweetly, “Lauren, my love, my one and only, my everything, my sweet sweet butterball turkey, will you be my everything forever and be my baby mama and be the Queen Bee and chez Puck?”
“You mean and let the Puckzilla impregnate me?!” Lauren exclaimed amazedly. “Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!!” she said with stars in his eyes. They shone so brightly she was momentarily blinded.
Kurt said ironically, “What a crazy random happenstance!! Blaine just propposssed to me last night!! It can be a double wedding!” Lauren squealed delightedly at this.
“Sir Tubbington asked me to marry him. The ceremony is tomorrow. None of you are invited because you don’t support our love,” Brittany said succinctly.
Rachel took Kurt’s and Lauren’s hands and said brightly “I’ll plan everything!! It will be the wedding I, um, you guys always dreamed of!!” She flounced off muttering crazily about bedazzled centerpieces, sequins, rainbows, and unicorns.
Sue barged in huffily and said “I heard your band of miscreants is planning some incestuous union. Also, how do you manage to hold up your head with all that product in your hair?” She kissed Schue lovingly on the mouth before exiting stage left.
Will went to Emma’s office and found her and Holly Holliday making out. She turned to him and said besottedly “Thank you ever so much for bringing us together, Will! Only the true heartbreak of losing your love could have bonded us like this.”
April turned to Will with a bottle of Jack in hand and said drunkenly “Finally, a real party at this place! And it started without me!”
“I thought you were going to dry out,” Will said accusingly.
“Are we still on for that three way with Sue tonight, Willybear?” April said beseechingly.
Will turned over in bed.
12.
Sweet Home Ohio
"Cleetus Pierce-Lopez, get your behind out here right now!" yelled a very pregnant Brittany.
"What did I do this time, Mama?" whined a boy no more than 7 years old.
"Why does Puck have a mohawk?" Puck, their dog, wagged his tail happily when he heard his name called.
"Well I thought I'd help him find a girlfriend, and Ma always says chicks dig badasses."
Brittany sighed, "Your Ma says a lot of things, but that doesn't mean you can go around doing things like this."
"Doing what?"
Brittany turned to her wife who had joined them on the porch.
Santana, gently wrapping her arms around Brittany's belly, peered at her son's work of "art".
"That's badass." She says with a grin.
Brittany sighed again, trying to contain a smile. "What am I gonna do with you two?"
"I don't know, but I do know that I needs me a beer. So get, woman!" Santana laughs swatting Brittany on the ass.
Brittany fakes an angry glare, "And you'll be sleepin' in the doghouse with Puck tonight." With a flip of her hair, struts inside.
Santana and Cleetus share a look before bursting into laughter.
Through his giggles, Cleetus asks his Ma, "Do you think she's serious?"
Santana stops laughing.
"I hope no-" she's interrupted by Brittany who waltz outside, arms loaded with bedding.
"Here you go sugah', have a good night." She pecks Santana's cheek before she goes back in.
Santana looks from the sheets and pillow in her arms to Puck who has a doggy grin.
"What are you lookin' at flea bag?" She glares at the dog.
Puck just gives her a little bark before chasing after the man-child that gave him such a kickass hair cut.
13.
***WARNING: ADULT CONTENT***
Fin and Jessy glares at eachother as Coach Slyvester drugged them out of the prom by there shirt collars. Once she had toss them on there asses outside of the skool thay were at eachother’s throtes again. Fin lunged at Jessy just as he was attempting to get up of off the ground and nocked him back down again. Rolling onto the grass arms were flying everywear doing anything thay could to strike or pull or scratch wearever thay could.
Chest collision with chest. Arms rap around arms. Legs tangle with legs. And groin grinds against groin and befour either of them could think about it thay were both hard from the friction thay had created.
As soon as thay realised it thay both frozen. Jessy hover over Fin whose hands were up and clutched in Jessy’s shirt. Neither of them make a sound. Both were holding there breathe trying not to make any suddin movements eyes lock on eachother.
Thay hold this position four quite a while thinking that if their was no more friction that there problem would just goes away and thay could pretends that it didn’t happin. Of corse neither of them thot that seperating mite also work.
Afters a few very long minutes there was movements. Jessy slowly lowers his face towards Fin’s and rite as there lips are about to tuch thay were both hit from every direction with waters. Laughing thay just ignored it and close the gap between them. Lips crashed twogether. Fingers tangled in hare. Hip thrusted against hip.
A wile laiter as Dave was come out of the skool the last thing he expects two see was Fin and Rachil’s date rolling around in the grasses, soaked frum the sprinklers, lips attacheded, and shirts practicality hanging of off them. He felts his cock twitchs with desire as he sees them rut against eachother.
Half of hims wanted to run frum fear of them discuvering how much this was turned him on and the other half wants so badley to joins them. Ands befour he knew it he was on the ground with them thankfuls that both boys were two cot up in the moments two protest.
It woulds have been a sight two be saw if anyones had come out over the next twenty minuts. From a distanced thay were just a mass of arms and legs and exposed fleshes. Groping, grasping, clutching eachother. And when thay were finish thay all gets up without a word, cleans themselves up as much as thay could and walks away in different directions. Their are no parting glances. No promises of secret. Just three boys walking seperately into the nite, shockded grins on there faces and cum stains on there pants.
14.
Glee club was fun. Sam didn’t think he’d like it at first. But he did. And he really liked the dancing. He liked it most when he danced with Kurt. He tried to kiss the girls in the club. But he did not really like it. He liked dancing with Kurt. One day he and Kurt sang a duet. Sam couldn’t be quiet anymore. After Glee club, he talked to Kurt. “I love you.” Sam said. “I love you too” Kurt said. They were together forever. They got married and Kurt realized he was pregnant. They had twelve kids and all the girls were jealous.
Jesse was back. Rachel was happy. Sue was happy that Rachel was happy. Sue could destroy her. And sad Rachel meant bad Glee club. So then Sue would be happy. Jesse came to Sues house. “I did what you told me” he said. “Good” Sue said. This time she would destroy Glee club. It had taken her two years. She had created Jesse. Her best invention ever. He was a robot. He was made to destroy Glee club. Sue had made him with NASA. “Come here Jesse.” Sue said. Jesse walked over. She plugged him into the wall and laughed loudly. “Glee club is over” she said.
15.
TITTLE: LANDS
RITER: JEZEBEL DARLING (my soodname, shuddup)
SUMREE: STUFF HAPPENS ON TEH LANDS
UNCE APON A TIEM, KURTSIE WAS A YOUNICORN. HE WAZ A magicl uncorn and blane twaz a prinz nd the prinz roold all teh land even teh LAND OF TEH UNCOORNS AND TEH LAND OF TEH OONCORNS WAZ MAgcal az wel.
kurtsie teh uncorn waz stoped at teh river. teh magcal river. and teh magcal river waz MAGCAL. IT SPARCKLDD AND GLESTNED AND SHON LIEK A SUN ON A RANIE DAY. and tehre waz fihies in teh magcal river.
kurtsie stopped.
THE PRINZE FORMLY NOWN AS POPPER BLANE. STOPPD.
AT TEH GIANT TREE STOD A betuiful woman pegsus. she had shimry wings taht wERe liek dimands. eyes liek dimands. purple dimonds. cuz she totes had pretty purple eys.
she waz tane an tal AND her long blon hare waz long. it reechd her waste and blow in teh wend.
liek a leef blooing in teh brese.
her name twaz JEZEBEL, um, BELLE. AN seh waz teh mose beeteful gurl in teh word.
her dogs naim waz IMARTIK. SHE was tall and had wite wings cuz she was a magcal dog. seh had teel furz and long eers wen seh wagd her tale teh hole vaily shoock she waz a baddass dawg hoo garded over JEZEBELLE SHE WAZ SO AWSUM she gots a croun teh croun waz gold and sliver and waz covered in dawg prin shap dimends and ottter gewls.
and so kurtsie teh uncorn and teh PRINZ FORMLY NOWN AZ PAPPER BLANE MET AT TEH MAGCAL RIvr
tey kissed
tey loved
tey hugGD
tey livd haps evar after.
P.S. BELLE IZ TOTES NOT A MARrySUE. SHUDDUP
NAO WIT BONNUs eplog:
K, SO LIEK 9 MONTS AFTER KURTSIE AN TEH PRINS FORMLY NOWN AZ PAOPER BLANE met OOPSIES KURTSIE WAZ Totes preggers.
SO tey rushed kurtsie to ol’ doc brown on teh mowntansid
out pooped a kid
tey namd it SUEFINNQUINNRACHELSANTANAPUCKLAURENBRITTANYFIGGINSTHEPINKDAGGERTINAMIKEARTIEBURTMERCEDESEMMATERRISUZYSAMJACOBBECKYDAVEMATTHENRIBRENDABRADBEISTEHOLLYKENWESDAVIDTHADWARBLERSUNSHINESHELBYDUSTINGRACEJESSEBRYANHOWARDJOSHOLIVIAWURODANDREAJEANDRSHANEKENDRACARLCAROLAPRILWILL HUMMEL-WARBLER.
TEY CALLED HER NEIL
imartik was teh godmather
neil cam out of kurtsie wit a baddass musstash an caim out signin and dancin
MACARENA, MACARENA, MACARENA, HEY MACARENA, he sing
and he dancd teh elctric slide
HE WALKED, CUZ HES BADDASS AD TOTES WALKED AT BIRT, round wit a toy masheen gun gong POW POW BANG BANG
HE SING, WANT TAT BOOM BOOM POW
ANd daneced teh can can wyle doin it
an he slaide teh dragon an won teh land. tee end.
16.
Onse apon a time a gurl named Quin grew long blondee hare like the Rapunzel chick and it was so lovey so she walkid outside and the birds sang bcuz she so beutiful and Raychel walked out 2 so Quin was like 'hi jew nose' and raychel was all 'y u so mean tho' and Quin appologized and they bekame frands 4 life!!!! also Raychel dunsent have blondee hair but she has a gud singin voyce so i guess its ok lol anywa the end.
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