It's not up to me?
Why am I so dependent? Waiting for the next high my senses weaken and can only be fulfilled through the next hit. I suppose this is why the highs are so high... because the waiting in between has become unbearable due to the mundane surroundings of my room and the subject matter at hand, homework. (this time im gonna keep it to myself) The music in Amelie is beautiful. Why is it so hard to appreciate what you have? who you are now at this moment? without constantly looking into the future and seeing what you can become? i feel i need to create a balance between these two extremes. How can i focus on things that seem so utterly unimportant at this point. There is a glimpse of extreme hapiness that tantalizes my senses and obscures all reason. How can i concentrate? through distraction i suppose...