(no subject)
after talking with jo tonight, i realized that perhaps everybody (except for me) has been able to notice and comment on my state of being these past few days. apparently, i look like a wreck. well for the sake of clarifying, i am a wreck. i cant eat, i dont sleep well, and i cant get my mind to think of other things. i'm acting like a fucking girl and i can't stand it. i've never been one of those girls that goes super all out crazy babbling incessantly about the flavor of the week and how amazing etc etc etc he is. i feel like one right now. and it's upsetting. i want to be myself. i want to not be ridiculous and paranoid and a wreck. quite honestly, i'm in a fairly solid mental state (minus this girly bullshit... but i'm hoping maybe its that time of the month??) and i know nothing is upsetting me as much as my body seems to make it out as. on the other hand.. i have a hard time admitting when i have moments of weakness. ok well here's a week or so of it. put that in your fucking pipe and smoke it.