(Untitled)

[aerintine]

Title: Armor Thin
Author: aerintine
Era: Post-NFA
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Crossover with AtS
Word Count (this part): ~5000
Betas: My heartfelt thanks to these folks. dampersnspoons , whose excellent ideas, enthusiastic support, and patient guidance are the reasons I can do this at all. This story would not exist (or be readable) without her. lostboy_lj , who daily holds up the firmament

Comments

[abelina]

Bravo! So proud of you for posting your first story! I'm enjoying it very much. I love how you wove the battle in between Spike and Angel's conversation. The scene where Buffy and Spike met during the battle was perfectly awkward and realistic. I'd like to give you a nod for simultaneously dealing with some Buffy/Angel baggage while not falling into the pit of stereotyping.

My favourite line: As she watched, a Willow-shaped dervish blazed bright behind the great beast, because a Willow-shaped dervish is all sorts of awesome sounding.

I made you a creator tag for your new LJ name, so you can tag yourself for the next chapter.

[aerintine]

I'd like to give you a nod for simultaneously dealing with some Buffy/Angel baggage while not falling into the pit of stereotyping.

This is the best compliment I could get. I was really worried about getting it right. Thank you, Abby!

I made you a creator tag for your new LJ name <---- Thanks. :)

"Hey. I do NOT glower."

[dampersnspoons]

I love how you've tied in the fight with the present-day fight. ALWAYS FIGHTING! Spike, fighting. Buffy, fighting. Angel and Buffy, fighting! But it all ties together with the reunion of two people too busy fighting another fight to fight with each other. (Can I use "fight" more times in a sentence? Prolly.)

There were also some choice laughing lines in this:

“Well. Um. Turns out my ill-timed analogies are awkward…” she paused. Screwed her face into a disconcerted frown. “Weirdly sexual… and kinda incorrect.”

hahah! That sounds just like Buffy.

And: “Besides, I don’t like cookies. Spike’s the one who’d understand food analogies.”

The ending was bittersweet for Angel and Buffy, but apt and mature and just what should be said between them. Great job, Jamie!

Everybody fights sometimes

[aerintine]

Thank you, Beth. <3<3<3 I can't thank you enough for all your help with this. You've helped me think maybe just maybe I can write a story. :)

There were also some choice laughing lines in this

Thanks! There were more funny bits, but I had to cut some of my favorites when they got in the way of the tone. Damn tone.

[lostboy_lj]

A wisp of something small, something glimmering and bright she didn’t know still lived inside her, broke free. It fluttered a moment behind her breastbone, then floated away. A small sound escaped her throat, the tiniest whimper.

Gorgeous and lyrical.

Oh but, that's not what I'm here to talk about. Not mainly, anyway. I am a word-nerd, so I will talk about structure. I am also a boy, so I will talk about violence, explojuns, ratta-tatta-tats, columns of assault troops, decapitations, dragons and KrrrrrssshhhhhBooooooom!

This is a very clever structure, and made more clever by the casual way it is applied. I love, love, love the interwoven battle scenes with this sort of pschological "treaty-signing" between Buffy and Angel. The layered metaphor is clear without that hammer-on-the-skull sensation that capital-M "Metaphor" sometimes has.

The scenes of combat from various POV's sing and chop. Just one example:

The rest of her group appeared to be making progress as well; she could hear their whoops and shouts reverberating off

[aerintine]

My goodness, how do I respond to this giant comment of awesome-slathered excellence? THANK YOU.

I am also a boy, so I will talk about violence, explojuns, ratta-tatta-tats, columns of assault troops, decapitations, dragons and KrrrrrssshhhhhBooooooom!... I love, love, love the interwoven battle scenes with this sort of pschological "treaty-signing" between Buffy and Angel.

Ahhhh!YES! All I could think while writing was that if you didn't like the battle stuff, it would be curtains for me. Seriously you were the voice in my head saying 'Bring the crunch, Jams. Bring it.'

That's right folks. This isn't fucking ballet. Buffy Hacks and Guts. Duh! Winning!

Effing straight she does. She's got no time for frills cuz she's BUSY.

Aerintine, I'm so glad you wrote this. It proved what I already knew: that you are a great writer. This is my favorite alley scene, now, and I've rolled that film in my head quite a few times.

Well you just went and squished my heart with that, J. *squishes you back with spite joy*

[sidhlairiel]

I can never get enough of post-NFA Spuffy fics, so I was really excited to see this. I definitely wasn't disappointed! I loved the way you interwove the battle and Buffy and Angel's conversation and the entire scene at the end. It was beautifully written and felt very true to both characters. I loved the mentions of Connor and Nina too. I look forward to reading more!

[aerintine]

Thank you so much for your kind feedback. :) Post-NFA Spuffy is my favorite as well. I'm glad the characters rang true for you.

I'm coveting your icon. *covets*

[slaymesoftly]

OMG - This was wonderful. You're handling of the reunion, of Angel and Buffy's conversation, all wonderful. I can't wait to read the rest of it.

[aerintine]

Thank you very much! :D