(no subject)
i've been plagued by a wild swing between productivity and severe ennui this week, and learned a few things about myself last night. i learned that some friendships are just that. some people i will never forget. some people i will never forget about.
i've also learned that my tolerance for smalltalk has dropped to nil. for anybody to whom i was rude, i apologize, although you probably don't use lj anyway. to those whom i failed to greet, it was me, not you. i was in an interpersonal funk. not bad, i just realized that i've changed a lot and it was disconcerting.
so even though i though i'd be out more just as soon as my thesis was done, that's not true. i will always have projects that take up my time, because i enjoy them. i don't like going out and blowing money on shitty drinks that i could make bigger and better myself just to keep my hands busy while i talk about nothing with peple who would be much more interesting and much more themselves in other settings. i think i'm just getting old. i don't blame, and in fact i envy a little bit those who still find fun in it, but i don't. it was boring and annoying, and that's not a reflection on the company - that's all me.
i've also learned that my tolerance for smalltalk has dropped to nil. for anybody to whom i was rude, i apologize, although you probably don't use lj anyway. to those whom i failed to greet, it was me, not you. i was in an interpersonal funk. not bad, i just realized that i've changed a lot and it was disconcerting.
so even though i though i'd be out more just as soon as my thesis was done, that's not true. i will always have projects that take up my time, because i enjoy them. i don't like going out and blowing money on shitty drinks that i could make bigger and better myself just to keep my hands busy while i talk about nothing with peple who would be much more interesting and much more themselves in other settings. i think i'm just getting old. i don't blame, and in fact i envy a little bit those who still find fun in it, but i don't. it was boring and annoying, and that's not a reflection on the company - that's all me.