we don't play with barbie dolls, we just play with bats and balls!
Yesterday I was going to write an entry that began "The date is 6-6-06, so what better way to celebrate than by writing about women's sports?"
Then I realized, among other things, that it would be in bad taste, so I decided to hold off a day. Now that I've been writing for a few minutes, I realize this is going to be too long. Oh well.
First, I should fully disclose that I watched the women's college world series. That's softball. This is way out of character for me, but once I saw the Texas game, I managed to tune in for the four UA games after that.
Two reasons:
One, softball is a very bizarre, peculiar sport. Huge girls line up against each other and try to hit a huge ball with a huge bat on a tiny field. If a player has any speed whatsoever, she bats left-handed and her goal of every at-bat is to take a running start and smash the ball into the ground to create a high-bouncing play for the shortstop, because 96% of the time the girl is at first base by the time the shortstop fields the ball. Arizona has three very fast girls who do this quite well, so they had more runners on base than all the other teams, which eventually led to them scoring more runs than anyone else.
In addition, the pitcher is a girl usually over six-feet, who stands on a mound situated about 8 feet away from home plate. Softball pitchers have figured out how to throw a number of strange pitches - the self-expanatory rise ball and drop ball, a screw ball, a change-up, a fastball - and throw most of them over 60 mph. As such, every batter, even the best in the game, have very little chance to get a legitimate, non-slap hit.The UA pitcher gave up one run in the last 28 innings she threw. Again, this is an excellent formula for victory.
Also, maybe it was just unfortunate luck on my part, but softball players seem more prone to errors, particularly in important situations, than, well, every other group of athletes, except maybe women's basketball players. In the first Tennessee game, the shortstop for Tennessee booted a ground ball and dropped a pop fly right to her. In the next game, the second baseman dropped an easy toss from the shortstop, the third baseman threw it over the first baseman's head, one outfielder biffed on two ground balls and let two runners advance.
In the Texas game, with Arizona down 1-0, the Texas catcher bit on the lamest, most obvious little league play ever - the old first and third double steal. The girl on first took off, instead of faking the throw or looking the runner on third back, the catcher threw all the way down and let the girl on third score easily. How do you not see that coming?
Arizona won both games of the championship series easily, mostly because they have a good pitcher and Northwestern can't throw or catch. They made 6 errors in two games. I don't know if terrible defense is a staple of college softball, or just a fluke, so I'm trying very hard not to judge. And Arizona was fine defensively, so maybe it's just coaching or something.
So to summarize, the first reason why I watched the WCWS is because softball is baseball's tall, clumsy, slightly crazy, moderately attractive younger sister. Wow, I was trying to be nice, now that I read it again it didn't come out quite that way.
Now, I didn't have a second reason for watching this weekend. But let's just say, hypothetically, that I was someone else, a different person who wasn't in a happy, committed relationship, who didn't get in trouble for talking about other girls.
In that case, my second reason would be Caitlin Lowe.
Game was tied 0-0 when a girl from Tennessee hits one deep to left center. Caitlin Lowe is playing center field. She goes back at full speed to her right and lunges at the ball, gets a glove on it, but the fence gets in the way, so both she crashes into it and goes flying over the fence.
(montage courtesy of me, with help from Alt+Print Screen and Paint)
If that isn't sexy, I don't know what is.
Crashing into fences is sexy, and so are stolen bases, and diving catches, and stretching singles into doubles. I'm not too big on the whole eye black thing. There's no reason to make yourself look like Mark Grace or Brady Anderson out there. Nonetheless, I have become a very big Caitlin Lowe fan. She is what you might call an all-around player. And she's only a junior.
This is not really relevant to anything, but I think there's a general rule of thumb for dating softball girls. If you're interested, stick with outfielders, shortstops and second basemen. Both corner infielders are (usually) men, as are most catchers and pitchers, Jennie Finch being a blatant exception of course. But even she's 6'1, so if you're even going to think about it you better be some tall dude.
Most of the cuter girls are right up the middle though, as well as the corner outfield spots and pinch runners.
Okay, that's enough for now.
Then I realized, among other things, that it would be in bad taste, so I decided to hold off a day. Now that I've been writing for a few minutes, I realize this is going to be too long. Oh well.
First, I should fully disclose that I watched the women's college world series. That's softball. This is way out of character for me, but once I saw the Texas game, I managed to tune in for the four UA games after that.
Two reasons:
One, softball is a very bizarre, peculiar sport. Huge girls line up against each other and try to hit a huge ball with a huge bat on a tiny field. If a player has any speed whatsoever, she bats left-handed and her goal of every at-bat is to take a running start and smash the ball into the ground to create a high-bouncing play for the shortstop, because 96% of the time the girl is at first base by the time the shortstop fields the ball. Arizona has three very fast girls who do this quite well, so they had more runners on base than all the other teams, which eventually led to them scoring more runs than anyone else.
In addition, the pitcher is a girl usually over six-feet, who stands on a mound situated about 8 feet away from home plate. Softball pitchers have figured out how to throw a number of strange pitches - the self-expanatory rise ball and drop ball, a screw ball, a change-up, a fastball - and throw most of them over 60 mph. As such, every batter, even the best in the game, have very little chance to get a legitimate, non-slap hit.The UA pitcher gave up one run in the last 28 innings she threw. Again, this is an excellent formula for victory.
Also, maybe it was just unfortunate luck on my part, but softball players seem more prone to errors, particularly in important situations, than, well, every other group of athletes, except maybe women's basketball players. In the first Tennessee game, the shortstop for Tennessee booted a ground ball and dropped a pop fly right to her. In the next game, the second baseman dropped an easy toss from the shortstop, the third baseman threw it over the first baseman's head, one outfielder biffed on two ground balls and let two runners advance.
In the Texas game, with Arizona down 1-0, the Texas catcher bit on the lamest, most obvious little league play ever - the old first and third double steal. The girl on first took off, instead of faking the throw or looking the runner on third back, the catcher threw all the way down and let the girl on third score easily. How do you not see that coming?
Arizona won both games of the championship series easily, mostly because they have a good pitcher and Northwestern can't throw or catch. They made 6 errors in two games. I don't know if terrible defense is a staple of college softball, or just a fluke, so I'm trying very hard not to judge. And Arizona was fine defensively, so maybe it's just coaching or something.
So to summarize, the first reason why I watched the WCWS is because softball is baseball's tall, clumsy, slightly crazy, moderately attractive younger sister. Wow, I was trying to be nice, now that I read it again it didn't come out quite that way.
Now, I didn't have a second reason for watching this weekend. But let's just say, hypothetically, that I was someone else, a different person who wasn't in a happy, committed relationship, who didn't get in trouble for talking about other girls.
In that case, my second reason would be Caitlin Lowe.
Game was tied 0-0 when a girl from Tennessee hits one deep to left center. Caitlin Lowe is playing center field. She goes back at full speed to her right and lunges at the ball, gets a glove on it, but the fence gets in the way, so both she crashes into it and goes flying over the fence.
(montage courtesy of me, with help from Alt+Print Screen and Paint)
If that isn't sexy, I don't know what is.
Crashing into fences is sexy, and so are stolen bases, and diving catches, and stretching singles into doubles. I'm not too big on the whole eye black thing. There's no reason to make yourself look like Mark Grace or Brady Anderson out there. Nonetheless, I have become a very big Caitlin Lowe fan. She is what you might call an all-around player. And she's only a junior.
This is not really relevant to anything, but I think there's a general rule of thumb for dating softball girls. If you're interested, stick with outfielders, shortstops and second basemen. Both corner infielders are (usually) men, as are most catchers and pitchers, Jennie Finch being a blatant exception of course. But even she's 6'1, so if you're even going to think about it you better be some tall dude.
Most of the cuter girls are right up the middle though, as well as the corner outfield spots and pinch runners.
Okay, that's enough for now.