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Sep 29, 2005 19:31

where's the god damned plumber ( Read more... )

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drop_bear December 8 2005, 19:47:49 UTC
Wow. Sep 28? I haven't read anyone else's livejournal updates for a looooooong time. I use Livejournal for strictly narcissistic reasons. In fact, I sometimes go back and read my old posts before I will read posts from my friends list. Jeez, actually typing that out makes it way more real and pathetic. Oh well.

Anyway, one time in Grade 10 I had to do a book report. This teacher was this fucking cunt bag canme Ms. Jones who hated my older Brother, and my Mom. One time at a parent-teacher interview she was complaining about my brother and her and my mom had it out. Consequently, she also hated me, and all three of us hated her. In fact the first day I ever had her as a teacher I think she made some comment hinting that she was not too stoked that I was in her class. Anyway this fuckin piece of shit whore, she gave us a list of about 150 books to choose from. One of them was "Journey To The North Pole" by William Bixby. I thought "Bill Bixby? That guy played Bruce Banner on the Incredible Hult TV show! (Or Peter Banyon or whatever the fuck they renamed him. Funny sidenote: They changed his name from Bruce, to Peter because at the time the show was shot in the 70s, the name "Bruce" was considered too homosexual. True story.) In any case, I picked this book for that reason. Well I am still not 100% sure if it was the same Bill Bixby who wrote the book, I am assuming it wasn't, but soon after starting to try and read the book, I quickly didn't give a fuck. So I read the prologue and the epilogue to find out how the book started and ended, and then just made up my own story and wrote a book report on the story I imagined. The story was a wonderful tale about the hazards of trying to reach the North Pole close to the turn of the century filled with woes of frostbite, lack of sufficient technology, and scurvy. Ahhhh what a yarn I spun!

I got a 75% on the report.

The next year I had the same goddamn awful bitch again, and as she was giving her introduction to the class, she was talking about essays and she said that they had better be good, and have actual content to them, no filler. She said she could tell when someone just had a few main points and stretched the rest out with a bunch of filler. When she said that I remembered my "book" report, and laughed out loud.

"Is there something funny Dan?" She asked.

"Uhhh haha no." I responded.

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