(no subject)
I remember sitting at the dinner table at the old apartment my coworkers lived in. Fort Radalfo, they called it, due to the drivers license left behind from the previous owner. His last name was Radalfo. They all had different rooms in this town house with a balcony. We were drinking whiskey and beer, talking about how I broke my teeth and what it felt like. Kyle was listening to me intently and due to the alcohol began telling me about his life stories. Well he had just quit Mothers Market and traveled to Oakland and then to Yosemite for two weeks. He pointed at his Half-Dome tattoo. I told him about how I wanted to move to Olympia but I was scared because I didn't have that much money. Kyle, in his gun hungry obsessed nihilism, looked me dead in the eyes and told me, "Fuck the money, you have to do what your heart wants to do or you will regret it. I regret it and I'm only a few years older than you." I think about that conversation a lot when I start to back away from my plans and I know it meant something to hear him tell me that. Someone who is cynical and doesn't see any point telling me to live out my dreams. About an hour later he asked me to spend the night at his house and I said no, quite shocked he asked me that. So maybe his advice wasn't advice at all.