Jun 27, 2009 04:02
When I was a little girl, I guess about 7 , 8 , 9, I knew Michael Jackson very well. My mum loved him to bits, I knew that because she had a few video tapes and like all of the Michael Jackson music collection. Not hard to figure out an obsession, take me for example, Vampire Knight playing cards, Yuuki and Kaname Pillow with the same design on my playing cards, Kaname wall scroll, Kaname bag, Kaname dota name, I think you get the picture. Well it's like that when I was a kid, watching my mother love him as a fan. It's just something that happened. And her doing so, got me very familiar with all of his songs, especially his video Thriller. I actually loved that video a lot as a kid and watched it a bit. Maybe not as much as my mother, but I respected and loved him as an artist. I thought he was a fantastic singer and dancer. I also thought he would ALWAYS be there in the world somewhere, in his extravagant life style. Just being there. Being in this world, that I am also in. Allowing me to know him for a long time of my life, til he grows old and dies before I grow old and die. There's not many people that I consider to have a god like presence, in fact, I can't really think of any who could possibly move me more than him as his presence has been removed. Something so prominent, and so sure since my early childhood, has left us, and left me, in an absolute state of shock. Inside, I want to cry really badly... but I also want to fight those feelings of crying because it is so hypocritical. I was not a fan, I did not love him at his moment of passing, and yet I love him now that he is gone. I am such a hypocrit, so I will not allow myself to cry for him. But I will just give him my words. He was a huge part of this world, and now that he is gone, the world is more chaotic, and makes less sense... he will not be replaced, and he will be missed.