Anonymous Post

[sdx]

Tell me a secret, get something off your chest, or just tell a good story.

Anonymous replies, no IP tracking.

(and dont be the goober that replies to each and every secret someone else leaves, lol)

Comments

[anonymous]

Basically this all started several yrs ago this summer. Here goes.

NS. was a guy who contacted me at random on Myspace for dirty chat. For reasons I cannot explain (he's the lead vocalist for an Austin band called "V" so maybe it was his "pretty" singing voice among other things,) I developed a major crush on him, even though he was several years younger than I was. There never was any real life physical intimate contact between N and me other than hugs. We had some really REALLY sexually charged conversations online, and on the phone, but that's all, unfortunately. Since we also discussed regular things as well the as dirty stuff and we had several mutual acquaintances I figured we were just becoming friends. I thought he was funny and cute and an interesting person.

Well one night when I was just spying on N via Myspace and Livejournal, one of his friends AW contacted me and we got to talking- not actual dirty chat like I'd had with N, but A was basically telling me (and in retrospect I realize that this is what he was saying though not in so many words)-that I was wasting my time chatting with N because he was so immature and nothing was ever going to come out of it and if I was wanted to have some "real life" fun and not just on the internet I should hang out with him (AW)instead. So one night in late Sept. of '04 we fooled around and then I did not hear from him again, not for several years, but I'll get to that in a min.

Meanwhile I still pined for N's attention. I would go to his shows and sometimes he would act flirtatiously friendly, and other times would act like a total jerk. I even introduced a few people to him; L and her husband J, PM and Ph.(I think Ph thought he was cute too though she wouldn't admit it and tried to muscle in on him, but he wasn't interested.) Then one night in late April of '05 he went off on me at one of his shows and told me he was too busy to talk to me. Then a few days later he kicked me off his MySpace FList and when I wrote him asking for an explanation he told me he didn't owe me one and implied that I should no long contact him or bother him at his shows.

And I have not attended a V show since then either. I kept the band on my F-list to remind me what I fool I was to try to throw myself at a such young guy, and to never do it again.

Fast foreword to the summer of '07 shortly after I'd moved further north and one morning there was a message from AW. I couldn't believe it. I'd thought he'd forgotten about me. He wanted to "play" with me again and I like a fool I agreed. I was dying to know if N knew about any of the fooling around going on between A and me because N is one of A's good longtime friends. After our booty call, I did not hear from A again until Feb. '08 (just a couple of messages, but no encounter,) and then again just last April up until now. Part of me wants to tell him to get lost and never contact me again and another part wants to tell him to tell his buddy N that I want to have a 3-some with him and A and another part of me is just gonna sit there and go "Whatever!"

[anonymous]

wow... that is some seriously dull angst.

Not appreciated.

[sdx]

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