[oc] Refraction
It's been a while since I've written anything, a lot longer since I've posted. I hate that, because it's not that I don't have ideas (when don't I have ideas?) it's more like I can't seem to get together enough not to be just a ramble of thoughts. *shrugs* So far, I'm trying my best to focus on the short stories, the ones I can finish and get a sense of accomplishment from. *nods*
This is one of them. Because I love Sophie, and I can't stop writing about her. *g*
Title: Refraction
Author: M. F. Luder
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 1'800 words.
Category: Future fic.
Challenge: For fanfic100 and 94. independence day, though it's more a sense of it. The rest of the stories can be found at Big Damn Table.
Author's note: Thanks to 60schic for the amazing beta, babe. *nods*
Refraction
is the change in direction of a wave due to a change in its speed, seen when a wave passes from one medium to another
The wind picks up as the sun starts moving to its resting place, turning harsh and cold, and in less than an hour the sky will turn orange and pink and yellow. Ryan lifts the collar of his jacket and shivers slightly, rubbing his cheek against the soft fabric.
He smiles as he lets out a soft sigh, his natural reaction to watching Sophie.
"Ryan, Ryan. Watch me!"
"I'm watching, kiddo," he says, his eyes glued to her in the middle of the playground. He watches her run to the slide. For a second his heart jumps into his throat, but he swallows it down, gives her a shaky grin. "Careful."
He can't see her face from this angle, but he knows her, and he knows she's rolling her eyes at him, at his anxiety, a worrywart by nature. But that's his baby girl, right there, the same little person he was able to hold when she was no more than a minute old, now running to that death trap called playground equipment.
He swallows, the smile even tighter on his lips. "Sophie!"
"I'm fine!" She screams back, over her shoulder, not even turning around and giving him a glimpse of her face, the little brat. His eyes narrow but he doesn't say anything. It's a very close call.
"Your first, huh?"
Ryan blinks, glances to his right, to the woman sitting on one of the benches along the side of the park. She has dark hair falling over her shoulders, and she pushes it behind one ear. He thinks she's in her late thirties, maybe, a thick scarf around her neck, pulled up almost over her mouth. "I'm sorry?"
She smiles at him, and she looks younger when she does that; beautiful even. "Your kid, your first, huh? First parents are always worried they are gonna fall wrong and break their neck. Believe, I know. I've been there."
It takes him a moment to understand what she's saying, and then he chuckles, because everyone always assumes Sophie's his kid, even after she stopped calling him Da for Dayan and started saying Ryan properly. "No, no. She's my sister."
Her eyes turn wide for a second, and she glances at Sophie, Ryan doing the same. Sophie's standing on top of the slide, arms stretched to her sides.
"Ryan!"
"I'm watching!" Ryan says with a smile, and Sophie nods back at him before sitting and then sliding down. Ryan can actually feel his heart stop in his chest for a long, long moment before Sophie's feet hid the ground and then he lets out a long sigh of relief. Sophie only laughs, her laughter loud in his ears, rushing to climb up once again.
"Kinda sneaked up on your mom, huh?"
Ryan turns to look at the woman again, and she's grinning at him. He smiles back. "Yeah, you could say that."
"She's a lovely girl," the woman says before jerking her head toward the monkey bars. "Those are my kids."
He frowns, trying to match her face to any of the five boys over there.
"Two of them have brown jackets, the other one has the blue one and he just dropped his hat, great, I hope he doesn't lose it again, that'd be his second one and winter is barely beginning."
He watches the boys push each other for a moment, the oldest of the three picking up said hat and giving it to the middle child, nudging him in the shoulder. "They look like good boys."
She snorts. "They aren't. They are a handful, that's what they are." She turns to look at him and offers her hand. "Laura. Nice to meet you."
"Ryan," he says, shaking her hand, taking a seat on the bench when she slides to the side to make room for him.
Laura opens her mouth to say something, motherly advice, Ryan thinks, when she curses under her breath and checks her watch. "Damn it, we're already late." She stands up in a rush, reaching for the bag lying against the side of the bench that Ryan hadn't noticed. "It was nice meeting you, Ryan. Hopefully, I'll see you around."
Ryan nods and thanks her even as he watches her rush toward the boys. By her posture, he assumes the boys don't wanna leave, but a minute later, Laura has one hand around the youngest's hand, the other motioning for the other two.
"Ryan!"
"I'm watching," Ryan says again, turning to look at Sophie making her second slide down. He sighs, standing up as he does so. He'd rather be closer to Sophie, just in case, just in case.
She turns around as he makes his way to her. "I'm fine," she says, in a tone Ryan's heard before from a deeper voice, a lankier kid.
He can't help the smile on his lips. "I know."
She snorts. "No, you don't. You think I'm still a baby and you have to watch me."
He wants to laugh, because contrary to Sophie's opinion, she is only six and she is a baby, Ryan's baby, and Kirsten's and Sandy's, and she very much needs watching. He only bites his upper lip.
Her blue eyes narrow. The top button of her jacket has come loose and he wants nothing more than to reach out and do it for her. Last thing they need is her coming down with a cold. "You're making fun of me."
"I wouldn't dare," he says, and her eyes narrow even more before she turns around and places one too small sneaker clad foot on the base of the slide.
And there goes his heart again, all the up to his mouth, hitting the back of his teeth. "Sophie--"
"I'm fine," she says, she always says that. He's told Kirsten that he'll only stop worrying when she stops saying she is fine. Ryan just doesn't trust that word on Sophie.
With easiness and fearlessness he wishes Sophie didn't have, very much like Seth never did, Sophie crouches at the base of the slide, over the gleaming metal. She places one foot a little higher, keeping her balance with one hand around the edge of the slide.
He wants to reach out and pick her up, settle her against his hip like he learned to do when she was only a few months old. She's still little, he can take her.
She's about two feet up the slide when he can't take it anymore, he just places his hands on her waist and shifts her, settles her against his chest, sitting in the crook of his elbow, her legs around his waist. She squeals as he moves her, and then when she's settled, her eyes are so narrowed he can hardly see them.
"It's getting late," he says as an excuse, gives her a big smile.
She hmpfs at him. He smiles back at her. "You're playing Barbies with me."
For not having to watch her risk breaking her neck? Anything. "I'll think about it," he says, shifting her more than he should have, if only to hear her complain.
"You're playing Barbies with me. For a whole hour. And you'll ask Mom for cookies, too."
He places her down as they reach the edge of the playground, his car's parked a block down. This had been an unplanned stop after they'd gone to the bookstore because they had started reading "Ballet Shoes" in her class and she didn't have that one. It was the perfect opportunity to give Sandy and Kristen the afternoon off, take Sophie shopping and then home for the rest of Saturday. Ryan had jumped at the opportunity.
She takes his hand immediately, and Ryan squeezes it once before making their way down the sidewalk. She jumps over very other square on the sidewalk, and in a couple of years Ryan will explain to her how the squares on the street are made by contraction joints to control the drying shrinkage cracking of concrete by inducing the slab to crack at those points in particular.
"Barbies, Ryan!" she says again, hand clutched in his and jumping still, and he smiles and nods.
He's played Barbies before, he can play with them again. He swallows, the smile on his lips turning sad and reminiscing. He remembers Seth once told him how he used to ask for a brother or a sister, on each birthday and with every birthday wish, until he turned eleven and realized that wish was never going to come true. Seth said he used to promise that if he got a sister, he'd play Barbies with her and not complain. Seth told him that almost ten years ago.
"And tea. We're having tea, too, with Mommy's cookies. You're making the tea."
Ryan squeezes Sophie's hand once again, looking down at her as they reach the corner. "Okay, sweetie. Now, what do we do?"
"Wait until it turns red, look both ways before crossing the street." Sophie says diligently, doing as she explains, looking both ways the moment the street light turns green.
He nods, crosses the street with her, and tells her that they'll have postpone the tea party, because it's getting dark and they'll be having dinner in less than an hour. They can play Barbies afterward, for a whole hour, with one cookie while they play. They'll leave the tea and the other cookie for tomorrow. He promises her he'll be back tomorrow for lunch, but he has to go over work in the morning, or he'd stay the night.
Sophie pouts, but agrees, because she's grown up like that, and she understands that he has work and he can't play with her every day, nor pick her up from school every day, no matter how much he'd like to.
Ryan opens the back door for her, watches her settle in her booster seat and buckle herself up. He makes sure she's strapped in tight, pulling at it as he's seen guys in the Pit Crew pull at the straps on car racers, to make sure.
He gives her a peck on the nose, hearing her chuckle as he closes the door. He makes his way around the car and thinks about Seth for a fleeting moment, a second, remembers the way Seth used to smell, like oranges and the ocean, and can't help but think, sadly, that maybe Sophie was just born too late.
He puts the key into the ignition and starts the car. Sophie asks for something she can sing, so he puts in Fiona Apple, and he has no idea how she ever found Fiona Apple. It doesn't matter that she doesn't know all the words to the songs, she knows enough, and she's happy with that.
He watches her in the rearview mirror at the next red light, watches her give him a big grin, stick out her tongue at him. He doesn't think he could love her anymore than he does, and feels sad for Seth, for all the things he's missing, living his life off in Providence, and hopes he's half as happy as Ryan himself is at the moment.
There's a new icon to go with this story, the one that started this. Apparently, Sophie pics can be a great source of inspiration. *nods* Now, I just gotta tell my muses that killing Sophie is not in the books. It's not. Not even getting her kidnapped. Nope, I swear. *giggles*
This is one of them. Because I love Sophie, and I can't stop writing about her. *g*
Title: Refraction
Author: M. F. Luder
Rating: PG-13
Word count: 1'800 words.
Category: Future fic.
Challenge: For fanfic100 and 94. independence day, though it's more a sense of it. The rest of the stories can be found at Big Damn Table.
Author's note: Thanks to 60schic for the amazing beta, babe. *nods*
Refraction
is the change in direction of a wave due to a change in its speed, seen when a wave passes from one medium to another
The wind picks up as the sun starts moving to its resting place, turning harsh and cold, and in less than an hour the sky will turn orange and pink and yellow. Ryan lifts the collar of his jacket and shivers slightly, rubbing his cheek against the soft fabric.
He smiles as he lets out a soft sigh, his natural reaction to watching Sophie.
"Ryan, Ryan. Watch me!"
"I'm watching, kiddo," he says, his eyes glued to her in the middle of the playground. He watches her run to the slide. For a second his heart jumps into his throat, but he swallows it down, gives her a shaky grin. "Careful."
He can't see her face from this angle, but he knows her, and he knows she's rolling her eyes at him, at his anxiety, a worrywart by nature. But that's his baby girl, right there, the same little person he was able to hold when she was no more than a minute old, now running to that death trap called playground equipment.
He swallows, the smile even tighter on his lips. "Sophie!"
"I'm fine!" She screams back, over her shoulder, not even turning around and giving him a glimpse of her face, the little brat. His eyes narrow but he doesn't say anything. It's a very close call.
"Your first, huh?"
Ryan blinks, glances to his right, to the woman sitting on one of the benches along the side of the park. She has dark hair falling over her shoulders, and she pushes it behind one ear. He thinks she's in her late thirties, maybe, a thick scarf around her neck, pulled up almost over her mouth. "I'm sorry?"
She smiles at him, and she looks younger when she does that; beautiful even. "Your kid, your first, huh? First parents are always worried they are gonna fall wrong and break their neck. Believe, I know. I've been there."
It takes him a moment to understand what she's saying, and then he chuckles, because everyone always assumes Sophie's his kid, even after she stopped calling him Da for Dayan and started saying Ryan properly. "No, no. She's my sister."
Her eyes turn wide for a second, and she glances at Sophie, Ryan doing the same. Sophie's standing on top of the slide, arms stretched to her sides.
"Ryan!"
"I'm watching!" Ryan says with a smile, and Sophie nods back at him before sitting and then sliding down. Ryan can actually feel his heart stop in his chest for a long, long moment before Sophie's feet hid the ground and then he lets out a long sigh of relief. Sophie only laughs, her laughter loud in his ears, rushing to climb up once again.
"Kinda sneaked up on your mom, huh?"
Ryan turns to look at the woman again, and she's grinning at him. He smiles back. "Yeah, you could say that."
"She's a lovely girl," the woman says before jerking her head toward the monkey bars. "Those are my kids."
He frowns, trying to match her face to any of the five boys over there.
"Two of them have brown jackets, the other one has the blue one and he just dropped his hat, great, I hope he doesn't lose it again, that'd be his second one and winter is barely beginning."
He watches the boys push each other for a moment, the oldest of the three picking up said hat and giving it to the middle child, nudging him in the shoulder. "They look like good boys."
She snorts. "They aren't. They are a handful, that's what they are." She turns to look at him and offers her hand. "Laura. Nice to meet you."
"Ryan," he says, shaking her hand, taking a seat on the bench when she slides to the side to make room for him.
Laura opens her mouth to say something, motherly advice, Ryan thinks, when she curses under her breath and checks her watch. "Damn it, we're already late." She stands up in a rush, reaching for the bag lying against the side of the bench that Ryan hadn't noticed. "It was nice meeting you, Ryan. Hopefully, I'll see you around."
Ryan nods and thanks her even as he watches her rush toward the boys. By her posture, he assumes the boys don't wanna leave, but a minute later, Laura has one hand around the youngest's hand, the other motioning for the other two.
"Ryan!"
"I'm watching," Ryan says again, turning to look at Sophie making her second slide down. He sighs, standing up as he does so. He'd rather be closer to Sophie, just in case, just in case.
She turns around as he makes his way to her. "I'm fine," she says, in a tone Ryan's heard before from a deeper voice, a lankier kid.
He can't help the smile on his lips. "I know."
She snorts. "No, you don't. You think I'm still a baby and you have to watch me."
He wants to laugh, because contrary to Sophie's opinion, she is only six and she is a baby, Ryan's baby, and Kirsten's and Sandy's, and she very much needs watching. He only bites his upper lip.
Her blue eyes narrow. The top button of her jacket has come loose and he wants nothing more than to reach out and do it for her. Last thing they need is her coming down with a cold. "You're making fun of me."
"I wouldn't dare," he says, and her eyes narrow even more before she turns around and places one too small sneaker clad foot on the base of the slide.
And there goes his heart again, all the up to his mouth, hitting the back of his teeth. "Sophie--"
"I'm fine," she says, she always says that. He's told Kirsten that he'll only stop worrying when she stops saying she is fine. Ryan just doesn't trust that word on Sophie.
With easiness and fearlessness he wishes Sophie didn't have, very much like Seth never did, Sophie crouches at the base of the slide, over the gleaming metal. She places one foot a little higher, keeping her balance with one hand around the edge of the slide.
He wants to reach out and pick her up, settle her against his hip like he learned to do when she was only a few months old. She's still little, he can take her.
She's about two feet up the slide when he can't take it anymore, he just places his hands on her waist and shifts her, settles her against his chest, sitting in the crook of his elbow, her legs around his waist. She squeals as he moves her, and then when she's settled, her eyes are so narrowed he can hardly see them.
"It's getting late," he says as an excuse, gives her a big smile.
She hmpfs at him. He smiles back at her. "You're playing Barbies with me."
For not having to watch her risk breaking her neck? Anything. "I'll think about it," he says, shifting her more than he should have, if only to hear her complain.
"You're playing Barbies with me. For a whole hour. And you'll ask Mom for cookies, too."
He places her down as they reach the edge of the playground, his car's parked a block down. This had been an unplanned stop after they'd gone to the bookstore because they had started reading "Ballet Shoes" in her class and she didn't have that one. It was the perfect opportunity to give Sandy and Kristen the afternoon off, take Sophie shopping and then home for the rest of Saturday. Ryan had jumped at the opportunity.
She takes his hand immediately, and Ryan squeezes it once before making their way down the sidewalk. She jumps over very other square on the sidewalk, and in a couple of years Ryan will explain to her how the squares on the street are made by contraction joints to control the drying shrinkage cracking of concrete by inducing the slab to crack at those points in particular.
"Barbies, Ryan!" she says again, hand clutched in his and jumping still, and he smiles and nods.
He's played Barbies before, he can play with them again. He swallows, the smile on his lips turning sad and reminiscing. He remembers Seth once told him how he used to ask for a brother or a sister, on each birthday and with every birthday wish, until he turned eleven and realized that wish was never going to come true. Seth said he used to promise that if he got a sister, he'd play Barbies with her and not complain. Seth told him that almost ten years ago.
"And tea. We're having tea, too, with Mommy's cookies. You're making the tea."
Ryan squeezes Sophie's hand once again, looking down at her as they reach the corner. "Okay, sweetie. Now, what do we do?"
"Wait until it turns red, look both ways before crossing the street." Sophie says diligently, doing as she explains, looking both ways the moment the street light turns green.
He nods, crosses the street with her, and tells her that they'll have postpone the tea party, because it's getting dark and they'll be having dinner in less than an hour. They can play Barbies afterward, for a whole hour, with one cookie while they play. They'll leave the tea and the other cookie for tomorrow. He promises her he'll be back tomorrow for lunch, but he has to go over work in the morning, or he'd stay the night.
Sophie pouts, but agrees, because she's grown up like that, and she understands that he has work and he can't play with her every day, nor pick her up from school every day, no matter how much he'd like to.
Ryan opens the back door for her, watches her settle in her booster seat and buckle herself up. He makes sure she's strapped in tight, pulling at it as he's seen guys in the Pit Crew pull at the straps on car racers, to make sure.
He gives her a peck on the nose, hearing her chuckle as he closes the door. He makes his way around the car and thinks about Seth for a fleeting moment, a second, remembers the way Seth used to smell, like oranges and the ocean, and can't help but think, sadly, that maybe Sophie was just born too late.
He puts the key into the ignition and starts the car. Sophie asks for something she can sing, so he puts in Fiona Apple, and he has no idea how she ever found Fiona Apple. It doesn't matter that she doesn't know all the words to the songs, she knows enough, and she's happy with that.
He watches her in the rearview mirror at the next red light, watches her give him a big grin, stick out her tongue at him. He doesn't think he could love her anymore than he does, and feels sad for Seth, for all the things he's missing, living his life off in Providence, and hopes he's half as happy as Ryan himself is at the moment.
There's a new icon to go with this story, the one that started this. Apparently, Sophie pics can be a great source of inspiration. *nods* Now, I just gotta tell my muses that killing Sophie is not in the books. It's not. Not even getting her kidnapped. Nope, I swear. *giggles*