A brief, grouchy rant followed by the intended entry - something about He-Man and She-Ra
So . . . basically, I've just found out that LJ has it in for anyone without high-speed internet, just like everyone else. I mean, it's now clear that the reason I can't post on LJ from home has to do with the fact that the rich text bar doesn't load with any speed, rather than that I am truly prevented from using it.
Pfui.
Anyhow, that's neither here, nor there. I decided to wander through the annals of my brain's childhood insanity, and I recalled a patently ridiculous list I came up with as a child of why She-Ra was better than He-Man. Yes, I had a list.
It started with clothes.
You see . . . well, let me put the picture below.
So, if you look at He_man, standing next to his sister, She-Ra, you will note he is wearing almost nothing but furry red underpants and matching boots with a little breatplate thing. Why is he wearing furry red underpants? Aren't they itchy? Not to mention, the blue breastplate thing is tacky and it doesn't exactly protect his chest from anything. Now, years later, I see that it's the thing holding his scabbard onto his back. But all I could see at the time was that it clearly wasn't doing much to protect him from anything.
She-Ra, meanwhile, may be underdressed as well, but white and gold look good together, and she isn't wearing anything unecessarily furry. Admittedly, the headdress is a little much, but I thought that the furry undies totally outwheighed her headdress for tacky.
Then there's Prince Adam, the guy He-Man is when he's not in furry undies. I didn't like his clothes because he was dressed in pink. Which I didn't like. Meanwhile, his long lost sister Adora, who is She-Ra when she's not in the white miniskirt, is all in red. In closeup, years later, I note, he's wearing lavendar furry undies over lavendar tights. And while Adora's wearing only half an outfit, at least it's not . . . furry lavendar undies.
Anyhow, that's the clothing section of the list.
The next thing on my list was the swords. I mean, He-Man's sword is a big hunk of sharp metal. Awesome enough, and it's the thing that transforms Adam into He-Man. Sure. But that's all.
She-Ra's sword transformed into a lasso, and a shield and a bunch of other stuff over the course of the series. I mean, isn't that more awesome? And I bet she could have transformed it into more stuff. Lose your flying machine engine? "Sword to engine!"
The next part of the list is a noting that She-Ra is clearly a better person than He-Man because of her transformation incantation.
He-Man: "By the power of Greyskull! I have the power!"
She-Ra: "For the honour of Greyskull! I! Am! She-Ra!"
Now compare the two. The first is saying that, thanks to the power of Greyskull, He-Man is really strong. The second is saying that, in defense of the honour of Greyskull, Adora has become She-Ra. Do you see the difference? One is just "Rargh! Me smash!" The other is a statement of intent. She is doing this in order to defend and uphold the honour and tradition of Greyskull. Also, "By the power of Greyskull! I have the power!"? That's repetitive, isn't it?
Yes, I actually was thinking that back when I was eight to ten years old, which was about when I put my list together. I had way too much time on my hands. Also, Dad's an English PhD. It kinda comes with the territory.
Finally, there are the sidekicks. Adam has Cringer, He-Man has Battle Cat. Adora has Spirit and She-Ra has Swift Wind.
Now, Cringer can talk. Sure. But he's well-nigh useless most of the time, and episodes where he's useful as Cringer are the sort of thing where they're making a big deal about him overcoming his fears. Spirit, on the other hand, is useful in his normal state. He's a good horse, carries Adora around like a horse should and doesn't flinch from danger. When you get to the transformed Battle Cat, yes, He-Man can ride him, he's got the armour and saddle. But he can't fly, can he? Swift Wind can fly as well as talk.
Maybe it's just me, but seriously, I still think she was better than he was.
SCWLC