A Tale of Two Turtles
Maybe I should have gone with "The Song of the Turtle" or "Turtles turtles rah rah rah!". I don't know. I just felt like telling a story someone once told me about her own turtle. It's not long, but hey, I don't have much to say at the moment.
Once upon a time there was a turtle. He was a happy turtle and lived in an apartment building somewhere in what is now known as the GTA. It used to be known as Toronto, North York, East York, the City of York, Scarborough, Mississauga, Thornhill and Vaughn but that's a story of political evils involving a provincial government ignoring a 70% majority and going ahead with a citywide merger.
Anyway. So the turtle lived in an apartment building. It had a balcony and a radiator. The turtle liked to climb into the radiator and often had to be fished out again because his owners didn't want him to vanish down the pipes.
One day the turtle decided to explore the balcony. It was a balcony like many others, and it had an edge. The turtle walked off the edge and began to fall. He fell very far to a small turtle, and seemed about to fall to almost certain doom.
By luck, the wind pushed him back toward the building he had just exited and sent him tumbling onto the balcony below. He set about exploring the new balcony and apartment. The owners of the apartment found him and picked him up. They surmised that, since he had fallen from the sky, odds were he was from the apartment above them.
So the owner of the lower apartment carried the turtle back up to the higher apartment and returned him to his owners. There he lived, happily, until the day he vanished into the pipes of the radiator never to be seen again.
Who knows? Perhaps he is still defying logic and walking off high places like a lemming to this very day.
The End
A happy tale no?
Personally, I'm with Gilbert Gottfried (whose name I just had to spend long minutes looking up on my Disney's Aladdin tape) on the issue of turtles. I'd try to explain this remarkable statement but you really have to at least be speaking with someone or, better yet, watching his routine about turtles to get it. It was good too. 'Cause turtles need the steps.
SCWLC
Once upon a time there was a turtle. He was a happy turtle and lived in an apartment building somewhere in what is now known as the GTA. It used to be known as Toronto, North York, East York, the City of York, Scarborough, Mississauga, Thornhill and Vaughn but that's a story of political evils involving a provincial government ignoring a 70% majority and going ahead with a citywide merger.
Anyway. So the turtle lived in an apartment building. It had a balcony and a radiator. The turtle liked to climb into the radiator and often had to be fished out again because his owners didn't want him to vanish down the pipes.
One day the turtle decided to explore the balcony. It was a balcony like many others, and it had an edge. The turtle walked off the edge and began to fall. He fell very far to a small turtle, and seemed about to fall to almost certain doom.
By luck, the wind pushed him back toward the building he had just exited and sent him tumbling onto the balcony below. He set about exploring the new balcony and apartment. The owners of the apartment found him and picked him up. They surmised that, since he had fallen from the sky, odds were he was from the apartment above them.
So the owner of the lower apartment carried the turtle back up to the higher apartment and returned him to his owners. There he lived, happily, until the day he vanished into the pipes of the radiator never to be seen again.
Who knows? Perhaps he is still defying logic and walking off high places like a lemming to this very day.
The End
A happy tale no?
Personally, I'm with Gilbert Gottfried (whose name I just had to spend long minutes looking up on my Disney's Aladdin tape) on the issue of turtles. I'd try to explain this remarkable statement but you really have to at least be speaking with someone or, better yet, watching his routine about turtles to get it. It was good too. 'Cause turtles need the steps.
SCWLC