Dreaming
Originally posted @ http://scruffy-duck.net
Normally the nightmares are restricted to pms, and I have ten days of intense nightmares then none for another four to six weeks (sometimes longer, but my cycle is another entry I think).
However with therapy comes remembering old memories, they stick in my mind and I dream about them, or extensions of them. Or just about my dad in general. If I haven’t had a nightmare about my dad, I consider it a good night.
I’m anemic at the moment, I know the symptoms, not that I’m full of iron most of the time anyway, but right now it’s worse. I’m pale, loosing hair, and the biggest give-away of all is the amount of sleep. I can tell when it’s therapy induced exhaustion, stress-shattered sleep, or, in this case, anemia drained rest.
I could sleep for England as the saying goes. In fact, I could sleep for several countries. I’m going to skip the entire process where I go to the doctor, they take my blood, and a week later tell me I’m anemic and need iron tablets, by just going and buying the exact same tablets he prescribed me last time.
My problem is my motivation. I’ve never been highly motivated, with the depression and that, add in the desire for so much sleep and, well, I’ve been meaning to buy these tablets for two weeks now and have yet to go to the chemist I know I can get them from and actually buy them.
Anyway, the nightmares, they leave me feeling raw and terrified most of the time. A lot like I did when I was a kid, with my dad. I didn’t sleep much when I was at my nan’s. During the day I slept.
I haven’t dreamt about the hot junior doctor for a month now, and it makes me sad. I had a huge crush on her, was completely smitten with her and now I’ll never see her again and I’ve finally stopped dreaming about her. It’s a shame really. My subconscious is finally moving on.
Instead I’m dreaming regularly about other people and have yet to discover what my subconscious is telling me about them. Hopefully it will present herself. The nightmares about my dad are very easy to decipher, and when I have completely surreal dreams, it’s usually with a variety of people. I don’t normally dream just about one or two people over and over without a reason.
Or maybe my dream pattern is changing again. I haven’t changed my medication in any way, which is usually the big effect on my dreams. Prozac gave me nightmares, on the 40mg of Seroxat I didn’t remember any of my dreams, on 60mg I remember almost every detail of almost every dream.
I need to go to bed now, get some more sleep, so I can get up tomorrow around ten. On a Sunday? I know, I must be crazy, but then, that would explain the therapy and the medication…
Normally the nightmares are restricted to pms, and I have ten days of intense nightmares then none for another four to six weeks (sometimes longer, but my cycle is another entry I think).
However with therapy comes remembering old memories, they stick in my mind and I dream about them, or extensions of them. Or just about my dad in general. If I haven’t had a nightmare about my dad, I consider it a good night.
I’m anemic at the moment, I know the symptoms, not that I’m full of iron most of the time anyway, but right now it’s worse. I’m pale, loosing hair, and the biggest give-away of all is the amount of sleep. I can tell when it’s therapy induced exhaustion, stress-shattered sleep, or, in this case, anemia drained rest.
I could sleep for England as the saying goes. In fact, I could sleep for several countries. I’m going to skip the entire process where I go to the doctor, they take my blood, and a week later tell me I’m anemic and need iron tablets, by just going and buying the exact same tablets he prescribed me last time.
My problem is my motivation. I’ve never been highly motivated, with the depression and that, add in the desire for so much sleep and, well, I’ve been meaning to buy these tablets for two weeks now and have yet to go to the chemist I know I can get them from and actually buy them.
Anyway, the nightmares, they leave me feeling raw and terrified most of the time. A lot like I did when I was a kid, with my dad. I didn’t sleep much when I was at my nan’s. During the day I slept.
I haven’t dreamt about the hot junior doctor for a month now, and it makes me sad. I had a huge crush on her, was completely smitten with her and now I’ll never see her again and I’ve finally stopped dreaming about her. It’s a shame really. My subconscious is finally moving on.
Instead I’m dreaming regularly about other people and have yet to discover what my subconscious is telling me about them. Hopefully it will present herself. The nightmares about my dad are very easy to decipher, and when I have completely surreal dreams, it’s usually with a variety of people. I don’t normally dream just about one or two people over and over without a reason.
Or maybe my dream pattern is changing again. I haven’t changed my medication in any way, which is usually the big effect on my dreams. Prozac gave me nightmares, on the 40mg of Seroxat I didn’t remember any of my dreams, on 60mg I remember almost every detail of almost every dream.
I need to go to bed now, get some more sleep, so I can get up tomorrow around ten. On a Sunday? I know, I must be crazy, but then, that would explain the therapy and the medication…