The Other Doctor - Pt. 3/?
NOTE: Well ... I only missed the Monday release by a day. Better than I thought!
KARMA
Juliet was relieved when Sawyer refused to let Kate go back to the beach with him.
Not only did she still have a deep-rooted desire for redemption - she'd rather Kate not get pulled into the leftovers of the mess she made.
It wasn't Sawyer's place either but she knew she would most likely end up appreciating his help.
Juliet offered, "... I can take us back to the beach ..."
Kate agreed with Jack but didn't say anything. Juliet shouldn't have to go back. She deserved the same chance as the rest of the group to go home.
Kate had a fleeting thought that she didn't want her to go back, but recognized that Sawyer needed help and if he wouldn't let her go, then Juliet was really the only other option.
... and then Juliet kissed Jack.
Juliet - kissed - him. Kate immediately wondered if maybe it wasn't their first kiss.
She expected her spite toward Juliet to come rushing back - but oddly, it didn't.
She began rationalizing her lack of reaction ...
((Jack makes Juliet feel like she isn't alone and nobody should feel alone. He deserves to be happy - maybe Juliet makes him happy, maybe he makes Juliet happy ... she deserves to be happy too.))
She took a deep breath and then caught eyes with Jack after Juliet started walking away.
Kate could tell he hadn't expected the kiss - and the look he gave her was almost sad - as if he was saying, "I wish things were different."
FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS
They could have just burned the bodies, but Juliet had known these men - known that they were slaves to Ben's orders, just like she had been.
So she dug graves while everyone else sat around waiting to be rescued.
She thought about Jack - about kissing Jack.
She had to remain nonchalant or Jack would have seen through her lie about the gun stash.
She had felt like she had nothing and everything to lose all at once.
Why not kiss him if they were going home soon anyway?
Why not kiss him if the mission she was going on with Sawyer could turn out to be suicide?
She did it on a fleeting need to be cared about, to be missed - to have one last encompassing feeling of connection.
The more she thought about it the more she realized it had very little to do with Jack.
She felt a little guilty for kissing him in front of Kate. She felt a connection with her too, a sort of camaraderie between women in predominately male controlled environment.
She respected Kate. They shared an ability to endure and adapt.
But there was something more to it - Kate intrigued her.
She suddenly regretted not saying goodbye.
THE BEACH vs. THE BARRACKS
If there was a boat waiting to rescue them - then the beach was the obvious choice for Juliet.
She had no desire to ever return to the barracks - especially not when Locke was suddenly on Ben's side.
She considered the fact that Jack ... and Kate had chosen the beach as well - a bonus.
It was obvious that most of the beach camp still didn't trust her.
Knowing that she was capable of performing desperate measures in desperate times - made her wonder how many others were the same way.
Should a situation arise - the more friends, the better.
Juliet turned to begin the walk back to the beach.
Kate caught her attention before she took a step. "Juliet." she said as she casually approached her.
Juliet turned around.
"Thank you for going back with Sawyer."
Juliet nodded, "You should be thanking Sawyer for going back with me. I had to go - he didn't."
"I would - but he's on Team Locke and they already left." Kate teased.
Juliet smiled, "Well, regardless of the team name - I'm glad we're on the same one."
Kate smiled back, "Me too."
THE BEACH AND THE CALVARY
Juliet was worried when Jack and Kate didn't return that evening.
Their absence gave her time and motivation to start doubting the intentions of the freighter crew.
She and Sayid decided better safe than sorry - and headed back into the jungle.
Sure enough, they came across Jack and Kate in the possession of Miles and Daniel.
After revealing themselves via gunfire - the group decided to continue looking for Charlotte.
"Someone could have told me the cavalry were here." Kate said in a half playful half serious tone as they started their trek.
Jack teased her, "I gave you that, wink."
Juliet laughed - which made Kate laugh.
Jack just shook his head and quickened his pace.
Juliet and Kate fell behind - but were still within site of the group.
"What do you think about all of this?" Kate inquired.
"I think it's a good thing that there are more of us, than them."
"You sound worried."
"I'm only worried about going home ... " she paused then looked at Kate, " ... about all of us going home."
THE NATIVE
Juliet would never have guessed that the sight of an intact helicopter could bring her such joy.
Not long after Frank revealed to Miles that Juliet was a native - Kate sat down next to her.
"The others happen to teach you how to fly a helicopter?"
Juliet laughed, "I called in sick that day."
Later - Kate decided to go with Sayid and Miles to the barracks and Juliet agreed to bring Desmond back from the beach.
When Juliet returned - as did Sayid with Charlotte, Juliet listened as Sayid told Jack that Kate decided to stay at the barracks.
It was obvious by Jack's facial expression that he was disappointed.
What wasn't obvious to Juliet was why exactly she shared his disappointment.
PLAYING HOUSE
Kate needed to know if Miles knew that she was a fugitive - so she decided to stay at the barracks at least long enough to find out.
She admitted to herself that she was glad Sawyer was there.
She liked the way he made her feel - safe, protected. It was a nice escape from always having to be on her toes.
He fell asleep before she did.
Her thought trail lead her to the last time she had slept in a bed ...
She smiled.
She didn't know whether or not Juliet knew - that it wasn't just the morning that they had spent unintentionally cuddling.
Kate had woken up at some point while it was still dark - and Juliet was spooning her.
Juliet's arm was around Kate's waist - her chin somewhat resting on Kate's shoulder. Her breathing was steady and quiet - so Kate knew she was asleep.
Kate took the opportunity to allow herself to feel comforted by being "accidentally touched".
She couldn't remember the last time she had cuddled with a woman - or really, if it had ever happened before then.
It was different, in a good way. Juliet was just tall enough that their bodies fit well together in that position. Her skin was soft - she didn't snore.
She made Kate feel peaceful - so much so that Kate had easily fallen back asleep.
Sawyer stirred and Kate snapped back to present time.
She fell asleep with her head on Sawyer's chest ... but with Juliet on her mind.
BACK TO THE BEACH
When Kate didn't come back from the barracks - Juliet found her frequently popping into her thoughts, especially on the trek back to the beach.
She thought about when they were drinking wine on the bluffs and Kate accidentally told her she was beautiful.
She smiled to herself. At the time she felt like reciprocating was too bold - especially when Kate quickly played it off.
But she did think Kate was beautiful and was flattered by her comment.
Jack happened to look up and catch Juliet smiling.
He teased, "Know something I don't?"
She lied, "Just thinking about going home."
Jack nodded, "Me too."
She liked Jack. Kate liked Jack. Jack liked them both. It was logical that she and Kate had the potential to get along quite well.
She hoped Kate would change her mind about the barracks and come back to the beach.
THE OTHER WOMAN
Juliet was hardly ever surprised anymore. She'd seen and done things on the island that were previously unfathomable.
There were certainly times when she was convinced she'd seen it all.
Joining a search party, in this case for Daniel and Charlotte, seemed tame.
Somebody was always somewhere doing something that someone else felt like they needed to know about.
At least she wasn't the main attraction for suspicious eyes anymore.
Seeing Harper startled her and sent a rush of guilt through her thoughts. She knew that Harper blamed her for Goodwin's death - and technically, she was right.
After asking Jack for his help they changed course and headed toward the Tempest.
What did surprise Juliet was that for as much as she should be focused on the task at hand - her thoughts kept wandering back to personal issues and she found herself thinking about Kate - again.
Did Kate think of her like Harper did - as the "other woman"? Did Kate just tolerate her or genuinely like her?
Jack interrupted her self-inquiry, "Something's wrong ... we should've caught up with them by now."
Shortly after they heard groans and discovered Kate lying on the ground.
As soon Jack rushed over to her Juliet knew he'd be distracted at least until he knew she was ok.
Juliet didn't have time to wait so she offered to get Kate water and then continued toward the Tempest instead.
She continued the self-inquiry in solitude.
It bothered her that she couldn't she tell what bothered her more - Jack giving Kate his attention ... or Kate giving Jack hers.
OVERDUE
They returned to the beach after the Tempest gas had been rendered inert by Daniel.
Juliet was exhausted. She hadn't slept in a day or so and the events that filled her time used up energy she didn't have.
She took an overdue nap after Sun helped her fix the roof of the lean-to.
She dreamt that she was inside of her childhood home but it was hauntingly empty.
She heard crashing waves so she looked out the window and then suddenly she was in her house at the barracks.
There were voices coming from somewhere inside the house so she followed them.
Kate and Jack were standing in the living room, facing each other. They briefly looked over at her and then began kissing.
Juliet turned away and tried to open the front door but it had no handle.
She turned back toward the living room and Jack was gone. Kate looked like she had been crying.
Juliet approached her and tried to ask her if she was ok but she couldn't speak.
Kate looked her in the eyes and said softly, "I have one too."
Juliet was confused until Kate pushed up her shirt sleeve and revealed a tattoo on her shoulder in the same shape as Juliet's marking.
Juliet traced the outline with her finger and began to cry. She could suddenly speak, "I'm so sorry." she said over and over again.
She woke up a couple hours later with a headache and anxious energy.
She got up to grab some aspirin and came across Sun rummaging through the medical supplies.
After she was unable to convince Sun to stay at the beach instead of going to the barracks she revealed to Jin that Sun had been unfaithful.
She had had no intention of revealing that particular secret but was desperate for Sun to have a chance at being rescued.
The last thing she wanted, on a long list of last things, was to be apart of another death of a mother and child.
Kate witnessed the interaction and looked as if she might second Sun's slap across Juliet's face.
Juliet had dinner with Jack and then decided to take a stroll down the shoreline - hoping it would be her last one.
She had been walking for a few minutes when she was suddenly overwhelmed with a myriad of emotions.
She was so close to going home and yet it still felt like it was too good to be true. She couldn't get comfortable with the idea.
She felt foreign, detached - and nervous. She felt the weight of guilt and loss. She felt trapped and unsteady - and lonely.
In a close to panic state she took off running into the water and then dove in.
The waves were quiet and the water was warm. She floated on her back and stared aimlessly at the stars.
She floated until her mind quieted and then swam back to shore. She wasn't ready to go back to camp so she sat down on the sand, drew her knees to her chest.
Kate happened to glance down the beach just as Juliet was coming out of the water.
Sun had explained to her why Juliet told Jin about her affair. Sun was thankful that Juliet cared enough about her to not back down.
Kate could only imagine what Juliet might be feeling now - on what could be her last night on the island.
Juliet heard someone approaching and was slightly annoyed to be bothered - but when she turned her head and saw that it was Kate, she was relieved.
Kate handed her a blanket, "You looked like you could this."
Juliet smiled, "Thanks." and put the blanket around her shoulders.
Kate said "You're welcome." then turned to walk back to camp.
Juliet suddenly didn't want her to leave. "Want to join me?"
Kate turned back around. She thought Juliet was just being courteous, "I don't want to bother you."
Juliet shrugged and looked back at the water, "You don't bother me, Kate." Her tone was soft, almost melancholy - but her eyes were glossy.
She looked - lost.
Kate sat down next to her and wanted to say something - but didn't know what.
They sat in silence for quite a long time. Kate took the opportunity to do some reflecting of her own.
It all seemed like a dream. The plane crash, the hatch, the black smoke, the others, Aaron being born, Charlie dying - Jack, Sawyer, even sitting next to Juliet.
What seemed like a lifetime had only been just over three months ... for Juliet it had been three years.
Kate glanced over at her and saw that she was crying but trying not to.
Without saying anything Kate grabbed Juliet's hand and laced their fingers together.
Juliet closed her eyes, tilted her head back, and took a deep breath.
She opened them and turned toward Kate, "You don't have to stay."
Kate nodded and smiled, "Since you won't let go of my hand - I don't really have a choice."
Juliet laughed. "Then we can both go back."
Kate raised her eyebrows and teased, "You just want to walk hand in hand along the beach."
Juliet let go of her hand and gave her a playful push to the shoulder. "I still can't win with you, can I?"
Kate shook her head and smirked, "Doubtful. But by all means, keep trying."
A LITTLE MYSTERY TO FIGURE OUT
Juliet knew that having Kate hold the mirror during Jack's surgery wasn't the best idea - but she understood why Jack wanted her there.
After the surgery was over she had Bernard fetch Kate. She didn't want her to continue to be worried.
She told Kate that Jack kissed her because she knew how Kate felt about him. It had been odd being in the middle anyway ... and she wanted them both to be happy.
When Juliet left the tent she found Kate sitting outside and sat down next to her, "I'm going to stay up - in case he needs anything. You should get some sleep Kate."
Kate shook her head, "I won't be able to sleep."
Juliet figured that would be the case, "Then I guess we'll keep each other company."
Kate smiled.
After a bit of silence Kate's curiosity got the best of her, "So I know why Jack kissed you ... but why did you kiss Jack?"
Juliet hesitated and Kate became worried that she was being too invasive.
"Well ..." Juliet began and then paused, looked down briefly at the sand then directly at Kate, "I had just volunteered to potentially put myself back in the control of the people I just abandoned - unarmed, no plan."
She paused again, turned her eyes back toward the direction of the ocean. "I needed to feel cared about ... and I knew, for whatever reason - that Jack could do that for me."
Kate forgot to filter her thoughts, which seemed to be easy to do with Juliet, and casually said, "I cared about you."
Juliet smiled, tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm guessing you felt that way before I kissed him."
Kate turned her head toward Juliet, "When you kissed him I just felt alone."
She looked off into the distance and then continued, "When I went back to the barracks with Sayid I thought about staying there - about what it would be like to stay on the island, be with Sawyer."
She started picking at her fingernails. "But I couldn't. I came back to the beach for Jack - but I'm glad you're here too. And not just because you saved his life ..."
Kate looked at Juliet again - Juliet looked back at her. They held the gaze longer than intended.
Juliet smiled, "Well - I did owe him."
Kate smiled back and teased, "You would have done it anyway. You know doctors, always wanting to take care of people."
The breeze picked up and Kate shivered. Juliet noticed and stood, "Speaking of ... I'll be right back."
She returned with a blanket.
She sat down next to Kate again and draped it across both of them.
They made small talk for a while. Kate kept yawning.
"I don't mind if you sleep Kate. I'm pretty sure Jack won't either."
Kate yawned again, "No thanks."
Juliet started to gather the blanket, "Then sleep here. I'll wake you up if anything happens." She handed it to Kate.
Kate scrunched her brow in playful defiance and handed the blanket back to Juliet. She then scooted over to lay down and laid her head in Juliet's lap.
It pleasantly surprised Juliet. She smiled to herself and then covered Kate up and teased, "You sure you want to do that? People might think we're friends ... "
Kate laughed, "It'll just give them something to talk about."