A little life update
I have not updated here in almost a month. Cuh-razy. There isn't really much of a point to anymore. I switched over to another blogging site because I decided that I prefer blogging privately. If I try to add people then I become too self-conscious about what I say and start wording it nicely or making half of my entries blocked anyway. This time I just decided to bite the bullet and make the whole -thing- private. Life-wise... what's new? As much of the information for my gap insurance as I could muster has been sent out [hoorah!] and I will proooobably be denied again sometime next week for the bullshit that I didn't put in [boo!] but at least now I can say that the effort was made. I have decided that above everything else I fucking hate insurance companies. All of them, in any form. Every single insurance company that ever was was spawned from Hell itself and cooled down just enough to be able to survive on Earth. Damn them.
My case with the lawyer has no update insofar as I know. He kind of goes MIA for 3-4 weeks and then I call him and he says "Oh yeah you need this" or "This needs to happen before we can proceed" etc etc. Silly lawyers. I have decided that I don't care for them. It seems like a weird realization but I am pretty firmly set in the idea that I just don't like lawyers. It's not that Bruce seems like a bad guy or anything but he just gives me this weird vibe that I can't put my finger on. Ah, c'est la vie.
Money-wise I am doing a lot better, though still not great. We've managed to smooth out our finances enough to have a relatively steady routine and I can pay for all of my bills now. Thank God I transferred to CVS or I would be completely screwed for money. As of now I need something like $200 for my personal bills each month and I manage to have to dig into any savings I make by the end of the month to make the rest of the bills. Money just goes "Poof!" all of the time! It's alright, though. Finally, after a long, hard struggle, I have accepted that I am and will remain relatively poor until I am out of college. No matter how much money I make or put away - there are certain factors that are just going to prevent me from saving up any significant amount of money for a while. Some of it will be -future and current- car payments, some will be insurance, some will be a lack of funds from a time when I was sick or too busy to work or went out of town, some will be from unforeseen expenses like a $200-300 part for the car, some will be from desires such as moving to a place slightly farther away with better amenities and spending the extra money on gas, some will be from times when we party or when I spoil myself with a 30 minute massage. Basically there is very little chance that I will be able to get a good, solid ground for the next 5 years or so. After college I will then have to jump into the sea of paying for all of my bills on my own: including rent, utilities, health insurance, cell phone bills, car insurance, etc. My Dad has made it abundantly clear that he plans on severing my ties as soon as it is Earthly possible to. So I should make the best of the times where I have this little amount of income and prepare for life.
I am still with the Public Admin major and I am becoming really excited about it! Pre-registration to volunteer at University Medical Center starts January 8th and I'm biting at the bit to try to get a position there. It is close to home, it is a good medical center and it only requires 4 hours a week of volunteer for 2 semesters. Okay, let's be honest - that's a lot of volunteer time. But! It's laid out for you that way. You have to take the weird, uncomfortable shifts for the first semester - times like 2 a.m. - 6 a.m. or 11 p.m. - 3 a.m. Saturday night. It will be uncomfortable but it will allow me to see what hospitals are like to be a faculty member in and give me a fucking wonderful leg up for a resume post-college. I'm crossing my fingers, toes, etc hoping for this position. I can still apply 2 more times before I would have to look for a different internship but if I don't get it this semester I will start calling up other places for Summer and next fall to see what they can offer. A summer internship would be ideal because I won't have school but I'll have to make that call once the time comes.
Nathan and I are doing well. The New York trip was absolutely amazing. We had a great time hanging with his family - I loved seeing the farm and Niagara falls and he loved being considered an adult in his family. It gives me the warm fuzzies. His Dad and grandparents treated me really well and I have to say that I have come to see them as kind of family. Obviously his mom is totally like another mom to me cause I practically lived with her for a year - but his dad's side, too. I feel very blessed. There was one night on the trip that was a little bit sad. We had gone out to Appleby's with just his Dad, Cherie (his dad's girlfriend), and his grandparents and we made adult jokes and conversation. At the end of the night his grandmother or father said something about how we should leave before we got kicked out and I mentioned that my family once got shunned into the small room on my graduation. It hadn't hit me on Thanksgiving but it hit me right then that my grandmother was gone and wasn't coming back. I was quiet the whole way home and ended up getting mad at Nathan because I was emotional. I asked him what he honestly, truly thought of me because I couldn't gauge when he said things jokingly so often. He thought for a minute and said, "I don't know what I did to deserve you... and you can take that both ways!" I laughed and felt better. I know that I will never forget that.
We have had some friends over a few times and kicked back the rest of the time. It's a good life, really, and I want to enjoy the peace while it lasts.
A customer asked the other day if I was excited for Christmas. I shrugged and said, "Eh." Am I excited for Christmas? Kind of. I am excited for it in the way that a person is excited for removing a wart. It will be good in the end but it's also going to hurt like a bitch for a while. My grandfather's Christmas card had a picture of my grandmother on it. I cried when I saw it. It's going to be that kind of Christmas. When my grandmother was in the hospital the family used to go to Denny's to eat and joke around before and after we saw her. There was that looming sadness but I found it all worth it because we got to be together and hold strong in a time of crisis. I feel like Christmas will be a similar version of that - sad but good. My brother is coming down for about a day. I haven't talked to him in months but it doesn't really bother me much. At this point I know we don't quite see eye to eye on everything (or anything?) and it's probably as much his choice as it is mine.
So hey - happy holidays to any/everyone! I probably won't write again soon. Hope they go well!
My case with the lawyer has no update insofar as I know. He kind of goes MIA for 3-4 weeks and then I call him and he says "Oh yeah you need this" or "This needs to happen before we can proceed" etc etc. Silly lawyers. I have decided that I don't care for them. It seems like a weird realization but I am pretty firmly set in the idea that I just don't like lawyers. It's not that Bruce seems like a bad guy or anything but he just gives me this weird vibe that I can't put my finger on. Ah, c'est la vie.
Money-wise I am doing a lot better, though still not great. We've managed to smooth out our finances enough to have a relatively steady routine and I can pay for all of my bills now. Thank God I transferred to CVS or I would be completely screwed for money. As of now I need something like $200 for my personal bills each month and I manage to have to dig into any savings I make by the end of the month to make the rest of the bills. Money just goes "Poof!" all of the time! It's alright, though. Finally, after a long, hard struggle, I have accepted that I am and will remain relatively poor until I am out of college. No matter how much money I make or put away - there are certain factors that are just going to prevent me from saving up any significant amount of money for a while. Some of it will be -future and current- car payments, some will be insurance, some will be a lack of funds from a time when I was sick or too busy to work or went out of town, some will be from unforeseen expenses like a $200-300 part for the car, some will be from desires such as moving to a place slightly farther away with better amenities and spending the extra money on gas, some will be from times when we party or when I spoil myself with a 30 minute massage. Basically there is very little chance that I will be able to get a good, solid ground for the next 5 years or so. After college I will then have to jump into the sea of paying for all of my bills on my own: including rent, utilities, health insurance, cell phone bills, car insurance, etc. My Dad has made it abundantly clear that he plans on severing my ties as soon as it is Earthly possible to. So I should make the best of the times where I have this little amount of income and prepare for life.
I am still with the Public Admin major and I am becoming really excited about it! Pre-registration to volunteer at University Medical Center starts January 8th and I'm biting at the bit to try to get a position there. It is close to home, it is a good medical center and it only requires 4 hours a week of volunteer for 2 semesters. Okay, let's be honest - that's a lot of volunteer time. But! It's laid out for you that way. You have to take the weird, uncomfortable shifts for the first semester - times like 2 a.m. - 6 a.m. or 11 p.m. - 3 a.m. Saturday night. It will be uncomfortable but it will allow me to see what hospitals are like to be a faculty member in and give me a fucking wonderful leg up for a resume post-college. I'm crossing my fingers, toes, etc hoping for this position. I can still apply 2 more times before I would have to look for a different internship but if I don't get it this semester I will start calling up other places for Summer and next fall to see what they can offer. A summer internship would be ideal because I won't have school but I'll have to make that call once the time comes.
Nathan and I are doing well. The New York trip was absolutely amazing. We had a great time hanging with his family - I loved seeing the farm and Niagara falls and he loved being considered an adult in his family. It gives me the warm fuzzies. His Dad and grandparents treated me really well and I have to say that I have come to see them as kind of family. Obviously his mom is totally like another mom to me cause I practically lived with her for a year - but his dad's side, too. I feel very blessed. There was one night on the trip that was a little bit sad. We had gone out to Appleby's with just his Dad, Cherie (his dad's girlfriend), and his grandparents and we made adult jokes and conversation. At the end of the night his grandmother or father said something about how we should leave before we got kicked out and I mentioned that my family once got shunned into the small room on my graduation. It hadn't hit me on Thanksgiving but it hit me right then that my grandmother was gone and wasn't coming back. I was quiet the whole way home and ended up getting mad at Nathan because I was emotional. I asked him what he honestly, truly thought of me because I couldn't gauge when he said things jokingly so often. He thought for a minute and said, "I don't know what I did to deserve you... and you can take that both ways!" I laughed and felt better. I know that I will never forget that.
We have had some friends over a few times and kicked back the rest of the time. It's a good life, really, and I want to enjoy the peace while it lasts.
A customer asked the other day if I was excited for Christmas. I shrugged and said, "Eh." Am I excited for Christmas? Kind of. I am excited for it in the way that a person is excited for removing a wart. It will be good in the end but it's also going to hurt like a bitch for a while. My grandfather's Christmas card had a picture of my grandmother on it. I cried when I saw it. It's going to be that kind of Christmas. When my grandmother was in the hospital the family used to go to Denny's to eat and joke around before and after we saw her. There was that looming sadness but I found it all worth it because we got to be together and hold strong in a time of crisis. I feel like Christmas will be a similar version of that - sad but good. My brother is coming down for about a day. I haven't talked to him in months but it doesn't really bother me much. At this point I know we don't quite see eye to eye on everything (or anything?) and it's probably as much his choice as it is mine.
So hey - happy holidays to any/everyone! I probably won't write again soon. Hope they go well!