LAST TIME ON GOLDEN SUN, WE SAW A MULTICOLORED BOULDER ROLL DOWN A HILL. IT WAS EXCITING STUFF.
THIS TIME?
TEXT EVERYWHERE. WE'RE FINISHING UP THE REST OF THE INTRO. At least, we were until this part got denied for being too long. I mean, god, it's like 1000 screencaps just to get out of the rest of the introduction. And that's as many as 10 100s. And that's terrible.
BUT STAY WITH ME. IT'LL PICK UP SOMETIME I SWEAR.
We're back in Vale! Now with 100% less boulders!
IT'S BEEN THREE YEARS
HE'S BEEN FIXING HIS ROOF FOR THREE YEARS.
Jenna was so much cuter when she was younger.
His passionate heart BURNING RED.
TRANSITIONS, DO YOU USE THEM?
only mildly self centered.
That's one of the fun things that they do with the dialogue in this. :D If two people are talking at the same time, they make it seem like it.
YEAH, FREAK
AND THERE GOES JENNA'S MOODSWING WITH A 1080 DEGREE SPIN. WHAT FORM! WHAT GRACE!
actually no he's still fixing his roof
garet is both baffled and scared of the crazy
SO. LAZY.
IT's LIKE TWO FEET AWAY FROM HIM
HARDLY NECESSARY.
"Looks like it's about time to rip up that paper that bound you as my indentured servant."
"You know, that accident? The one with the boulder and the getting knocked into a coma by some people with weird skin colors and the fact that you just became part of another rpg cliche?"
Isaac: *feels vastly ignored*
:<
Dora is obviously used to Jenna's tendency to be a crazy bitch.
And another complete 180 for Jenna's mood!
Sounds exciting enough.
The children collectively roll their eyes as they expect a tangent from Dora.
"One that stays at home all day, fixing the roof with no complaints..."
IF YOU SAVE HER, SHE'LL JUST START TALKING AGAIN
a daredevil at heart, dora enjoys bungee jumping off of houses with no bungee cord.
Isaac still cries into his pillow at night from the trauma.
IT'S HOUSE REPAIRING TIME
NO DORA NO
Isaac silently weeps as his three-years long work is destroyed.
I AM MAKING ISAAC CRY A LOT YES. ~*LIFE*~ MAKES ISAAC CRY.
SUCCESS
Dora's eyes glaze over as she tries to think of the blackmail material she might have that would make Isaac fix the roof. Again.
So...so polite to the people that left her without a functional roof!
But 's cool. That roof is over Isaac's room, so it's not like DORA gets affected by it.
GO TEAM DELINQUENT
RUN, ISAAC. RUN AWAY, AND NEVER RETURN
And now, for making small talk with the citizens
It's only a practically holy place for a secluded group of people with special powers, but...NAAAH.
LEARN ABOUT YOUR HOMETOWN. GOD.
I think I need to break this law. Many times.
And just for your sass, this is mine.
Garet's house :D
DAMN KIDS *SHAKES CANE*
Poor Garet. Not even his own father trusts him alone.
WHAT ARE YOU
I CAN'T TELL FOR THE LIFE OF ME
UUUUUUH OOOOOOOH
UUUUUUUUUH OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
I could make so many bad comments about this :|
Ahahaha I love the sadface
Don'tsayanythingdon'tsayanythingdon'tsayanything
Also, as Garet's sister has reminded me, BEHOLD. PSYNERGY.
But it means you have to be important too :|
Aaaanyways, this looks important and
EEK
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK
I'll take care of you later.
In the form of very small big rocks!
All she did was warn me of monsters past that point. Didn't try to stop me or anything. I WAS READY TO SHOW HER TRUE POWER.
How nice. Puppies playing. Just kind of makes you happy, huh. Well, I have to go through there so
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME
FUCK YOU, PUPPIES I WILL PUNT YOU TO MARS. TO MARS!
I HATE PUPPIES.
I BET THEY TASTE GOOD WITH BARBEQUE SAUCE
oh hay look, disaster scene.
THE LADY IN THE WATER MIGHT GET YOU
god that was a terrible movie. Why do I have to remember it >:|
Just remember to watch out for the
CULTURE SHOCK WOAH
Old And Crotchety Lady? Is that you?
"It always cheered her up to watch you repair roofs and crush your sister's flowers day after day..."
YOINK
Only because Isaac hasn't been forced to labor at repairing that part of town yet.
you will be mine
OH HAPPY DAY. THIS CAN GET ME...ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.
Meanwhile, the other random Psynergy users are running about using their powers for entirely inane things. They just keep that a secret from Vale.
I LIKE THE WAY THIS MAN THINKS.
oh god next he's going to ask if Isaac wants to see something cool in his pocket ISAAC RUN
This is AMAZINGLY useful for dungeon survival. If you end up wasting all your Psynergy on stupid things like i do and don't have enough to heal yourself, just run around in circles and then you have enough within seconds! And since some dungeons and areas are redonkulously huge, I don't have to worry about conservation when nuking things.
This kid is going to show those hooligans what for
Because that really makes you special in a village FULL of adepts. Yes.
They won't be needing this
Isaac: *jealous*
Aren't you the same person that didn't care when Felix fell in a river? And you're wondering NOW?
WHAT A BITCH >:|
Either that, or old man Kraden has a fierce streak and has a rare tendency to maim his visitors when they interrupt his research. Oh my.
He secretly blames Isaac for the destruction.
does it involve cool things in your pocket please say no.
He's shaking the screen right now, but it's hard to tell in screencaps
If you want to destroy Vale AGAIN, yes. Stop causing earthquakes. :|
Garet's grandfather obviously feels the need to fence in his townspeople to keep them from reaching the outside world. Despite the fact that the fence only reaches their knees and doesn't account for paths through the trees, it has worked to this day.
The collective stupidity of the entire town fascinates him immensely.
I'm pretty sure that constitutes a god complex.
That, or MARTI GRAS IS IN TOWN WOOOOOO
Strange is Isaac's middle name! Time to go check this out.
OH GOD PEOPLE /sadface
You, sir, are suspicious.
But enough with him, back to what we were supposed to be doing. Which is apparently going to Kraden's place.
OH JESUS
Garet and Isaac huddle as flashbacks to their childhood trauma come back to them
WHY ARE YOU TWO HERE AGAIN GO AWAY :[
...
:DDDDDDD
INTRIGUE
uh
oh god they're coming towards us
NOT AGAAAAAAAAIN
Isaac and Garet have REALLY bad luck with being accused of eavesdropping by people with skin in fun colors. That are also violent and have no qualms with beating up children.
:D
YOU FOOL
what
but
IS IT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS EASY
And now we have names for these mysterious people. :D
I have seen so many people typo them that it's not even funny anymore.
I DON'T TRUST YOU
I like how Saturos and Menardi just completely disregarded this kid.
sorry kid, you're crazy.
I LOVE IT WHEN CHARACTERS RAMBLE TO THEMSELVES AND GIVE YOU A NICE LITTLE SUMMARY OF THE PLOT SO FAR, DON'T YOU? Thanks Kraden now I don't have to explain it
man, this guy has got a gant beard going on. I kind of expect him to start going like "HAHAHAHAHAHA *CLAPCLAPCLAPCLAPCLAP*" but it never happens.
Garet's gold star for the day
Hey, they've gotta make their hoes pay up somehow...
"Wasn't really paying attention. Too busy staring. I mean, come on. Blue skin! It's like they're from Mars or something!"
Sure is. Jerks need to find their own landmarks. Stupid tourists.
And tourism isn't? Hard town.
EVERY PUZZLE HAS AN ANSWER
Oh, you sneaky sneaky man
Silly bitch, nothing is impossible with the magic school bus!
...wait
that might be a problem, yes
YOU SNEAKY OLD BASTARD YOU
except for breaking village laws, but no one cares about that
they don't even have a jail. god.
STOP ASKING ME QUESTIONS
Why are they making it seem like Isaac has to do it all along GUYS D:
oh shit, i think that's a buuuurn, son
That must be one bitchin' stew Kraden's got going in there
Those bags had better be full of stew, old man :|
YEAH SWEET
but not before i ransack your house.
Kraden sure has a suspicious backyard. HMMM.
and NOW we're going
MY MORTAL ENEMY. AT LAST WE MEET
HAH, BITCH
Roger that, entering the sun in T-minus 10 seconds...
I always did like the architecture in this game.
these are some nice walls, i must say.
I hate these goddamn rock jumping puzzles. And there's three in Sol Sanctum alone. sob.
AND NOW FOR OUR FIRST ACTUAL BATTLE. HOT DIGGITY. Now I get to explain combat. Because there's a lot of it.
SO, here's the beginning battle screen that it shows at the beginning of every round when you're assigning all of your characters' actions. It's a complete turn-based system where the character's agility pretty much decides when they get to go in battle, but you still assign their actions before all that. It leads to hilarity if you don't pay attention to what you're doing. BUT MORE ON THAT LATER. This menu just has Fight (which leads to your actual battle actions), Flee, and Status. Two of these I actually use.
And then we go to assign the characters' actions. We can attack, use psynergy, use an item, or defend, pretty much. This is the psynergy that the characters can actually use in battle. Isaac is the only one at this point with a healing spell, so we love him.
Spells have both a symbol that shows what element it's under, and how many targets it hits. So, by this, flare is a fire spell and hits three targets. But it only hits the main target with the most damage, while the smaller bars get a little bit less damage. OH, STRATEGY.
Jenna and Garet are both Mars (ergo, fire) Adepts, so they get the same spells pretty much.
And here's the bar thing again. Sometimes if you move it and there's not a target to the side, it won't just go to the other side. So that's another thing you have to look out for if you're trying to hit everything.
SHAZAM
And another thing the battle system has is that dumb thing from like early NES RPGs where if the target you assigned them to attack dies due to something else, they'll just go straight to defending. ANNOYING? QUITE. Fortunately it's pretty easy (at least to me?) to get a handle on how much HP the enemies have in relation to how much your characters can dish out at the time, so it's not such a big problem.
And then we get absolutely nothing for making small creatures crispy. Figures.
I TOLD YOU THERE'D BE A LOT OF THESE fakgbdlabgla
ahahah oh my god those mushroom things look rediculous
ANYWAYS WHY DID I SCREEN CAP THIS BATTLE I DON'T QUITE REMEMBER. Well. Besides the fact that this time I'm mostly using melee attacks.
I'm trying to cut most out to save you the pain
OH RIGHT. CRITICALS. So, when a mommy monster and a daddy monster decide to beat the shit out of some kids, they make all these little glowy balls of light come gather 'round like children at Christmas
and then they channel all those children's happy, joyous emotions and turn them into HATRED and PAIN and channel them into a nice blade of hurt to deal a few extra points of damage but not enough to make anyone care because it's coming from a fat blue mouse with a hand pointer.
oh god it's like 3 AM i have no idea what the hell i'm even saying anymore
GODDAMNIT
That's better.
GOSH, I WONDER WHAT WE'RE GOING TO USE THIS FOR
someone with great interior decorating sense has been here
PROFESSOR I THINK I'VE GOT IT
if you've guessed yet that these braindead rpg puzzles are a great opportunity for me to use my innate knowledge of professor layton quotes, then 100 picarats to you.
I BET THAT DOESN'T MEAN THAT A DOOR OPENED UP IN THAT OTHER PASSAGEWAY which means i have to go back to the water jumping puzzle afksaglkbfffff
So, a door did open up, but I didn't think you needed to see it. It wasn't that exciting.
room panorama woooooah
I've gotta agree with him. Purple and tan floors aren't exactly the paragon of high art.
by the spanish, apparently
fkdhslkfh stop trailing off with your sentances.
no, let's just let the old man go and be crazy by himself
GARET YOU'RE MAKING IT HARD TO THROW IN SCOOBY DOO REFERENCES HERE.
anyways, time to move some statues.
HUZZAH
i hate sol sanctum
derp derp
OH MY GOD STOP MISSING
MEANWHILE
huttah
aand again
HEY AN ATTACK SPELL. I SURE DO LOVE ATTACK SPELLS
too bad garet's about to die alfkhagh
WOAH WE'RE LEVELING UP ALL OVER THE PLACE
you will be mine
fuck year.
I WONDER WHAT THIS IS FOR
I told you there'd be a lot of these.
I only wish I was kidding.
WHATEVER LET'S BLOW STUFF UP
This is pretty much the only thing Jenna's useful for.
BOING
well that was fun
:|
:[
>:[
AJSGLHAGH SLAGBN JUST LET ME GET OUT OF THIS ONE ROOM JESUS
MORE statue moving?!
rooms like these are the times when i'm glad you can hotkey the L or R buttons to be a psynergy power.
Y'know, I just thought of something. They say it's a relief of a minotaur, but it only has the head. But a minotaur's head just looks like a bull. It takes until about the shoulder line to differentiate from a regular bull and a dude with a cow head. The reliefs only have a head. HOW DO THEY KNOW IT'S A MINOTAUR
well, this game doesn't make much sense anyways.
so, there's two doors. hooray.
sweet, floating ferrets.
WE'RE HITTING THE BIG MONEY NOW
Enemies using abilities? Impossible!
So, that last door lead absolutely nowhere. NEXT DOOR.
Eh. At least they're getting pretty good level stats.
temple looting tra la la
GREAT CAN WE LEAVE PLEASE.
sorry to say but this isn't all that exciting for being the heart of the sanctum
CONCLUSIONS-- WE JUMP TO THEM.
ahah oh god i love garet
fun part is that he doesn't even give us a choice.
And by that he means making me do more inane puzzles.
BUT THAT'S ABOUT WHERE THE HALF POINT IS BY MY SLEEP DEPRIVATION ADDLED MIND'S APPROXIMATION, SO THAT ENDS PART ONE OF THIS GODAWFUL CHAPTER.
DO YOU KNOW HOW PAINFUL IT IS TO GET THROUGH THIS MANY TEXT BOXES WITHOUT EVEN HAVING THE FULL BATTLE SYSTEM YET? DO YOU?
actually what's more painful is the cornucopias of text box orgies in the second part. WOE.
I'll post the second part in a few days or something, just to spread it out a bit. OR SOMETHING.