(no subject)
I just talked to Bailey online. I told her that it was pretty obvious how she felt and how she wanted us to be. I told her that she didn't have to call me before she went to work, because there really wasn't anything left to say. I told her I was sick of being so comfortable with her, because it allowed her to see the weaknesses in myself that remaind concealed in herself.
She got upset.
She replied 'okay? well whatever' or something to that effect. She claimed not to have seen it coming. How is that possible? You don't share secrets with me, when I asked you if there was ONE thing you wanted to say to me, repeatedly, you couldn't think of anything. No 'I miss you' or 'I love you' or even a 'don't worry...', hell, I'd have taken a 'it's over', so long as it was a reply that could give me some kind of direction.
How can she honestly be surprised or even upset? Well, I know she's not upset, she replied 'I'm not pissed, I just didn't see it coming', when asked if she was upset. It didn't even phase her. I called her twice this weekend, and I know she wasn't really planning on calling me. Oh sure, later that week, maybe, but it wasn't a thought that she had to surpress. She doesn't even want to surprise me anymore.
I gave her the address to this journal in case she didn't understand why, as if that was possible. I kind of regret doing it, but not really, because I seriously doubt she's going to ever come here, in fact, she probably lost the address. This journal, if ever she should read it, would act as some kind of conclusion. Well, if not symbollically, at least when she reads my uncensored entries, I'm sure some she would rather go without reading.
Oh well, I suppose it'd only be fair, I read some of hers...
She got upset.
She replied 'okay? well whatever' or something to that effect. She claimed not to have seen it coming. How is that possible? You don't share secrets with me, when I asked you if there was ONE thing you wanted to say to me, repeatedly, you couldn't think of anything. No 'I miss you' or 'I love you' or even a 'don't worry...', hell, I'd have taken a 'it's over', so long as it was a reply that could give me some kind of direction.
How can she honestly be surprised or even upset? Well, I know she's not upset, she replied 'I'm not pissed, I just didn't see it coming', when asked if she was upset. It didn't even phase her. I called her twice this weekend, and I know she wasn't really planning on calling me. Oh sure, later that week, maybe, but it wasn't a thought that she had to surpress. She doesn't even want to surprise me anymore.
I gave her the address to this journal in case she didn't understand why, as if that was possible. I kind of regret doing it, but not really, because I seriously doubt she's going to ever come here, in fact, she probably lost the address. This journal, if ever she should read it, would act as some kind of conclusion. Well, if not symbollically, at least when she reads my uncensored entries, I'm sure some she would rather go without reading.
Oh well, I suppose it'd only be fair, I read some of hers...