Not. In. The mood!
From: marcus
Date: Mar 25, 2007 11:30 PM
Subj: hey
hey if we ever met could i give you head
From: Cody
Date: Mar 26, 2007 11:31 PM
Subj: RE: hey
My dear Marcus,
I know people come to MySpace for a variety of reasons. Personally, I come to MySpace in order to stay abreast of the latest developments with friends across the country, keep in touch with old acquaintances from college, and, every once in a great while, to eagerly anticipate messages from gentlemen with whom I would wish to engage in stimulating intellectual discourse (as was the case when I came across the above personal message from you waiting patiently in my humble inbox!).
And yet, I am aware that there are some who must use the medium for other purposes; for example, in your case, to seek out those with whom they might potentially enjoy engaging in oral sex, on the chance that (as I envision your hypothetical scenario) we might happen to run into each other, recognize each other, and that I might take you up on your standing offer of giving me head. Of course, to a hormonally-addled, socially-hobbled teenager such as yourself, greasy fingers fervently tapping the keyboard, testosterone-tinged eyes gleaming dully in the light of a computer monitor late into the night, I'm sure it doesn't take much beyond a MySpace profile with the words "male," "gay" and "single" to be interpreted as a potential sexual partner. And truly, you get right to the point, being sure to impress me with your economy of language, for in this fast-paced electronic world of the Internet, what else would there possibly be left to say?
Unfortunately, as sorely tempted as I may be to take you up on said unpunctuated, unsolicited offer of oral sex based solely on the private profile of a seventeen-year-old in Longview, Washington, I am afraid I must decline. You may rest assured that there are a number of factors which contribute to this weighty decision, not the least of which is the fact that if I did indeed seek out some casual oral sex, I could easily enjoy such without having to actually stoop so low as to use MySpace to do it. But, of course, I find myself a full seven years older than you, with perhaps a more advanced complement of resources at my beck and call; perhaps the outlook is much more bleak up in ol’ Longview. Some might be able to chalk up this hideous social misstep of yours to youthful enthusiasm ("Ooh! Cute boy. Offer head now!"), but actually, no. Sorry! There's no excuse, really. I like to think that in this big, crazy, mixed-up world of ours, both you and I, Marcus, can do better for ourselves.
xoxox,
Cody
Date: Mar 25, 2007 11:30 PM
Subj: hey
hey if we ever met could i give you head
From: Cody
Date: Mar 26, 2007 11:31 PM
Subj: RE: hey
My dear Marcus,
I know people come to MySpace for a variety of reasons. Personally, I come to MySpace in order to stay abreast of the latest developments with friends across the country, keep in touch with old acquaintances from college, and, every once in a great while, to eagerly anticipate messages from gentlemen with whom I would wish to engage in stimulating intellectual discourse (as was the case when I came across the above personal message from you waiting patiently in my humble inbox!).
And yet, I am aware that there are some who must use the medium for other purposes; for example, in your case, to seek out those with whom they might potentially enjoy engaging in oral sex, on the chance that (as I envision your hypothetical scenario) we might happen to run into each other, recognize each other, and that I might take you up on your standing offer of giving me head. Of course, to a hormonally-addled, socially-hobbled teenager such as yourself, greasy fingers fervently tapping the keyboard, testosterone-tinged eyes gleaming dully in the light of a computer monitor late into the night, I'm sure it doesn't take much beyond a MySpace profile with the words "male," "gay" and "single" to be interpreted as a potential sexual partner. And truly, you get right to the point, being sure to impress me with your economy of language, for in this fast-paced electronic world of the Internet, what else would there possibly be left to say?
Unfortunately, as sorely tempted as I may be to take you up on said unpunctuated, unsolicited offer of oral sex based solely on the private profile of a seventeen-year-old in Longview, Washington, I am afraid I must decline. You may rest assured that there are a number of factors which contribute to this weighty decision, not the least of which is the fact that if I did indeed seek out some casual oral sex, I could easily enjoy such without having to actually stoop so low as to use MySpace to do it. But, of course, I find myself a full seven years older than you, with perhaps a more advanced complement of resources at my beck and call; perhaps the outlook is much more bleak up in ol’ Longview. Some might be able to chalk up this hideous social misstep of yours to youthful enthusiasm ("Ooh! Cute boy. Offer head now!"), but actually, no. Sorry! There's no excuse, really. I like to think that in this big, crazy, mixed-up world of ours, both you and I, Marcus, can do better for ourselves.
xoxox,
Cody