4th of July Weekend
This is about my July 4th Weekend and is very long, so be warned.
Besides the fact that I got to see my friends in Gainesville, this weekend was probably one of the worst weekends I've ever had. And it all got the worst on the 4th. What a crappy 4th, definitely the worst I've ever had.
Wow, I don't mean for my first blog to be so depressing, but I wanted to vent about my weekend.
I got to Gainesville Friday night; Friday night, all day Saturday, and into Sunday morning.. was amazing, super, wonderful; had such a good time. I'm purposefully being vague about it; if you want to know more, ask me. In a nutshell, after being single for 2 years, I had finally found someone so amazing that I couldn't believe it (we had met back in the Fall of 2004 but never really spent any time together); and he wanted to be in a relationship with me. So, on July 1st, 2006, I enter into a relationship.
Sunday: Went to my friend Rosie's (anytime I go to Gainesville, I stay at Rosie's) Sunday morning when I got up; we all went to Tijuana Flats for lunch, and hung out for the day, then went over to her boyfriend Jeff's for poker and hanging out. Had a great time there and actually won $35 at poker.
Monday: Me, Rosie, Arlette (her lil sister), Beth (their roommate and #3 of my best friends.. Rosie and Arlette being #1 and #2), Rosie & Arlette's bf, 2 of Beth friends, and like 7 people from Jeff's work went to Ginnie Springs for the day. We all had such a fun time until about 6:30, and that's when my weekend started to unravel and kept getting worse. To make a long story short, one half of the group left about 6:30 to go tubing down the river (again), but those of us that were left happened to be all in the same car. Beth and her friends wanted to leave (and I could've stayed, but I wanted to get back to see someone), but Arlette and her bf wanted to stay and wait for everyone else to do "group" things (it takes about 2 hrs to tube down the river, so we would've just waited for 2 hrs). That's what started the irritation and aggravation of at least my group of people. As it turns out, the tubes we all rented were due by 6pm, and with a torrential downpour, and people wanting to leave and not leaving, and the other tubing group getting ask to leave the park because they didn't turn their tubes in, and everyone fighting at the meeting place, the end of that trip was not very fun. And so people are even still not speaking to each other and it's just one big mess.
We get back to Gainesville from Ginnie Springs about 9:10 on Monday night, and I wanted to go see Alex (and I needed to take a shower and get out of the house before tempers exploded). After my shower we end up fooling around (which I don't mind, because we're in a relationship after all); it's not until after all that, when we're cuddling, that we start talking about the distance (I'm not back in Gainesville / in school until January 2007), and to make a long story short, he had decided in the prior two days that he didn't want to do a long-distance relationship, and after a lot of talking, we decided to not be in a relationship (if you want more details about what was talked about, please ask). His primary concern, among others, was that he didn't want a potential for anything to happen (if he happens to meet someone or whatever), and would feel more emotionally distant from someone if he didn't live in the same town and wasn't able to be around him often.
I played it cool and didn't let on how much the whole situation sucked (not sure what he did after I left, but from the way he looked when I drove off, he seemed quite sad, so it'll be interesting to see what he says next time we talk; we both like each other, but I understood his concerns (understood but didn't agree with) for not wanting to expose himself to be crushed or anything).
I left his place (he was originally going to go with me from there to Jeff's place to meet all my friends, but I obviously didn't want that to happen anymore) at about 12:15, so now it is July 4th. What a great way to start the 4th. Within the first hour of my being there I had had four bottles of Miller Lite, which is normally a lot, but including the fact that I hadn't eaten since 3pm (when I had a hamburger at Ginnie Springs), I was quite intoxicated. We were playing poker too and I was doing pretty well, but ended up losing my $10 buy-in; that sucked. Then, I was laying my head on the table, and as time went on I wasn't getting any better. I was quite happy and the problems with Alex didn't seem to matter, but now I was concerned about me. I started drinking some water, but I knew it was too little, too late. About 2 or 2:30am I get the warning that my body gives me (I usually get right around a 60 second heads-up before I have to vomit), so I go to the bathroom, vomit, vomit again, swig some mouthwash, and go back to the table. I did feel better afterwards, but this just compounded to the already horrible 4th.
I end up sleeping on Jeff's couch (obviously I was not driving anywhere that night), right underneath a loud-ass clock that chimed every 30 minutes; I wake up about 10:00 (after a deafening chime) and can't go back to sleep. I had to lay there until someone else finally got up at 10:40ish. A little bit later Rosie and I go get some food (this new place called Barberitos; it's exactly like Moe's), and get some ice and beer for Jeff's July 4th party later (had everything else except those two). about 3pm we start playing some cards, and got together a cash game of poker (but only a $5 buy-in), and at 6pm we're still playing (it was down to three people, and I had about $10 in chips at this point). I had originally wanted to leave by 4pm, so I was starting to get a little cranky (and people weren't paying attention, and didn't really seem to want to play, but there was no cashing out, it was a tournament style). I end up losing (which was nice, I could finally hit the road to come to Sarasota), but the person that beat me ends up saying "Looks like you can go home now" which pissed me off, and I said so. I end up making sure he knew I wasn't mad at him, and was just cranky; so I finally get to hit the road to Sarasota about 6:15pm.
A long drive ahead of me and nothing to do but think, the drive home really sucked (especially being recently single again after having very high hopes and strong feelings). I decide to stop and get something to eat, and it takes forever at the drive-thru to get something, which made the night even worse. Later, my gas light comes on, and I have a BP card (which gives me 10 ash-back on BP Gas purchases), so I'm looking for an exit with a BP, finally find one, have to drive 1.6 miles on this road to get to the gas station, only to find the pumps off and the station closed. I drive back towards the interstate and fill up at some other gas station there.
I finally get home to Sarasota at about 9:40pm, in time to watch some program on ABC at Ford's Theater for Independence Day (hosted by Tom Selleck) and write this oh-so-lovely blog. It was good to write down my feelings; this weekend could not have been more of an emotional roller coaster; it went from supremely amazingly awesome to more awful than awful itself. At this point I don't even know how to feel, but I am definitely looking forward to taking a shower, going to bed, and embracing a July 5th where I will hopefully not be depressed and cry, where I will enjoy work (although that's not possible), and maybe start to try and recooperate from this weekend and start being more upbeat, because if I don't I can see myself easily slipping into some sort of depression. I already have major self-esteem issues, and to finally find someone that is amazing, cute, smart, funny, etc, and to basically be dumped 3 days after we are together, I can easily see this being a problem. I guess time will tell :-(
Besides the fact that I got to see my friends in Gainesville, this weekend was probably one of the worst weekends I've ever had. And it all got the worst on the 4th. What a crappy 4th, definitely the worst I've ever had.
Wow, I don't mean for my first blog to be so depressing, but I wanted to vent about my weekend.
I got to Gainesville Friday night; Friday night, all day Saturday, and into Sunday morning.. was amazing, super, wonderful; had such a good time. I'm purposefully being vague about it; if you want to know more, ask me. In a nutshell, after being single for 2 years, I had finally found someone so amazing that I couldn't believe it (we had met back in the Fall of 2004 but never really spent any time together); and he wanted to be in a relationship with me. So, on July 1st, 2006, I enter into a relationship.
Sunday: Went to my friend Rosie's (anytime I go to Gainesville, I stay at Rosie's) Sunday morning when I got up; we all went to Tijuana Flats for lunch, and hung out for the day, then went over to her boyfriend Jeff's for poker and hanging out. Had a great time there and actually won $35 at poker.
Monday: Me, Rosie, Arlette (her lil sister), Beth (their roommate and #3 of my best friends.. Rosie and Arlette being #1 and #2), Rosie & Arlette's bf, 2 of Beth friends, and like 7 people from Jeff's work went to Ginnie Springs for the day. We all had such a fun time until about 6:30, and that's when my weekend started to unravel and kept getting worse. To make a long story short, one half of the group left about 6:30 to go tubing down the river (again), but those of us that were left happened to be all in the same car. Beth and her friends wanted to leave (and I could've stayed, but I wanted to get back to see someone), but Arlette and her bf wanted to stay and wait for everyone else to do "group" things (it takes about 2 hrs to tube down the river, so we would've just waited for 2 hrs). That's what started the irritation and aggravation of at least my group of people. As it turns out, the tubes we all rented were due by 6pm, and with a torrential downpour, and people wanting to leave and not leaving, and the other tubing group getting ask to leave the park because they didn't turn their tubes in, and everyone fighting at the meeting place, the end of that trip was not very fun. And so people are even still not speaking to each other and it's just one big mess.
We get back to Gainesville from Ginnie Springs about 9:10 on Monday night, and I wanted to go see Alex (and I needed to take a shower and get out of the house before tempers exploded). After my shower we end up fooling around (which I don't mind, because we're in a relationship after all); it's not until after all that, when we're cuddling, that we start talking about the distance (I'm not back in Gainesville / in school until January 2007), and to make a long story short, he had decided in the prior two days that he didn't want to do a long-distance relationship, and after a lot of talking, we decided to not be in a relationship (if you want more details about what was talked about, please ask). His primary concern, among others, was that he didn't want a potential for anything to happen (if he happens to meet someone or whatever), and would feel more emotionally distant from someone if he didn't live in the same town and wasn't able to be around him often.
I played it cool and didn't let on how much the whole situation sucked (not sure what he did after I left, but from the way he looked when I drove off, he seemed quite sad, so it'll be interesting to see what he says next time we talk; we both like each other, but I understood his concerns (understood but didn't agree with) for not wanting to expose himself to be crushed or anything).
I left his place (he was originally going to go with me from there to Jeff's place to meet all my friends, but I obviously didn't want that to happen anymore) at about 12:15, so now it is July 4th. What a great way to start the 4th. Within the first hour of my being there I had had four bottles of Miller Lite, which is normally a lot, but including the fact that I hadn't eaten since 3pm (when I had a hamburger at Ginnie Springs), I was quite intoxicated. We were playing poker too and I was doing pretty well, but ended up losing my $10 buy-in; that sucked. Then, I was laying my head on the table, and as time went on I wasn't getting any better. I was quite happy and the problems with Alex didn't seem to matter, but now I was concerned about me. I started drinking some water, but I knew it was too little, too late. About 2 or 2:30am I get the warning that my body gives me (I usually get right around a 60 second heads-up before I have to vomit), so I go to the bathroom, vomit, vomit again, swig some mouthwash, and go back to the table. I did feel better afterwards, but this just compounded to the already horrible 4th.
I end up sleeping on Jeff's couch (obviously I was not driving anywhere that night), right underneath a loud-ass clock that chimed every 30 minutes; I wake up about 10:00 (after a deafening chime) and can't go back to sleep. I had to lay there until someone else finally got up at 10:40ish. A little bit later Rosie and I go get some food (this new place called Barberitos; it's exactly like Moe's), and get some ice and beer for Jeff's July 4th party later (had everything else except those two). about 3pm we start playing some cards, and got together a cash game of poker (but only a $5 buy-in), and at 6pm we're still playing (it was down to three people, and I had about $10 in chips at this point). I had originally wanted to leave by 4pm, so I was starting to get a little cranky (and people weren't paying attention, and didn't really seem to want to play, but there was no cashing out, it was a tournament style). I end up losing (which was nice, I could finally hit the road to come to Sarasota), but the person that beat me ends up saying "Looks like you can go home now" which pissed me off, and I said so. I end up making sure he knew I wasn't mad at him, and was just cranky; so I finally get to hit the road to Sarasota about 6:15pm.
A long drive ahead of me and nothing to do but think, the drive home really sucked (especially being recently single again after having very high hopes and strong feelings). I decide to stop and get something to eat, and it takes forever at the drive-thru to get something, which made the night even worse. Later, my gas light comes on, and I have a BP card (which gives me 10 ash-back on BP Gas purchases), so I'm looking for an exit with a BP, finally find one, have to drive 1.6 miles on this road to get to the gas station, only to find the pumps off and the station closed. I drive back towards the interstate and fill up at some other gas station there.
I finally get home to Sarasota at about 9:40pm, in time to watch some program on ABC at Ford's Theater for Independence Day (hosted by Tom Selleck) and write this oh-so-lovely blog. It was good to write down my feelings; this weekend could not have been more of an emotional roller coaster; it went from supremely amazingly awesome to more awful than awful itself. At this point I don't even know how to feel, but I am definitely looking forward to taking a shower, going to bed, and embracing a July 5th where I will hopefully not be depressed and cry, where I will enjoy work (although that's not possible), and maybe start to try and recooperate from this weekend and start being more upbeat, because if I don't I can see myself easily slipping into some sort of depression. I already have major self-esteem issues, and to finally find someone that is amazing, cute, smart, funny, etc, and to basically be dumped 3 days after we are together, I can easily see this being a problem. I guess time will tell :-(