Im not gonna make the same mistake twice...
Well, this is the time where it seems more or less...Post Makayla...to me.
Im not with her and i haven't been for a while and yet, it still seems to bite me in my ass when i try to do something that has nothing to do with her...but it's not her fault, nor is it mine, it's just people thinking that they know what's best for others when clearly, they just need to keep their so called knowledge to themselves...
I met this girl...Ashley Brown.
We've been talking for a few weeks now...and everything is pretty damn awsome with her and me. It's really great and great is what i need sometime...cause i keep getting screwed over on everything that has something to do with a relationship. I need a girl that is everything i could think of to put in a girl. A great sense of humor, fun to talk to, a girl that always has something to say that challenges me and makes me laugh and think about my answer a little bit, a girl that is beautiful to me and a girl that will make the relationship just as much fun as i will and i found her...Ashley, is just amazing to me. She's not boring in anyway, our conversations and whatnot, could go on for hours and never be boring or without a laugh. Everything she says to me is the exact thing that needs to be said and in return, i can talk to her way better than i could talk to makayla or any other girl i've been interested in. Im not afraid to say certain things or bring up stuff to talk about for fear of having my head bitten off.
I really, genuinely like Ashley alot, and she knows it.
But people seem to be trying their best to make sure me and her don't work. Telling her that im just talking to her to make makayla mad, or telling her that im just wanting to date her to get back at Makayla for breaking up with me, and among other indescribably stupid things. None of this is true but it makes Ashley think that im not who i act like i am. She has her doubts about how nice i am and how complimentary i tend to be, how crazily i like her and how i can't wait to talk to or see her again. Because of these people saying silly fucking shit, she thinks that im fake and not who i really am. But im slowly making her see that, im not stupid enough to hurt her to get back at makayla, and that im not lying about anything to do with me. Enough people know me, that she could ask anyone about me and they'd tell her everything they know about me and assure her that im exactly who i seem to be.
There's so many things i'd like to say to people who just seem to trail behind me trying to fuck up my life and everything in it but im to nice and mature to worry about them...Making me miserable might make them happy for a little while, but when i prevail and i get what i want and i make it work, they are gonna be just a miserable as i was, or worse, simply because i ruined their plans to ruin me.
I really like Ashley, she makes me happier than i have been in a long fucking while...probably happier than i've been all year. And because of this, im cautious about what i do. I don't want to push it or jump into a relationship to fast, i don't want to ruin me and her...Right now, we're just friends, we're just talking, getting to know each other, im getting to know her mom and wow, her mom is freakin cool, and everything so far, is coming along nicely...In a few weeks, i've broke boundaries that it took me many months to break with Makayla. That doesn't mean anything bad about Makayla it just means, that stuff wasn't easy to work out with me and her and well, with me and Ashley...it's just simple and outstanding. I almost always wear a smile when im talking to her, because i know that everything is great.
Because of people saying stuff...she's under the impression im still in love with Makayla. Yeah, i love makayla, like a friend more or less, i care for her alot...i just can't, NOT care about her....but no, im not in love with her, i don't think i ever was...and i know that me and her aren't ever gonna date again, we aren't ever gonna be more than friends, just because me and her, never made anything work...If makayla wanted to make stuff better with me and her, i'd like to think she would have done it when we were together...and if she is trying to do stuff now, it's just to late for anything like that...but i don't think Makayla would try to fuck me on my happy times...she's not that way about things i believe. People who have no clue about stuff and still talk about it like they do, are just fucking silly bitches and i'll tell them every day i see them.
Life is full of diseases, just ready to tear and rip away at your happiness...and i for one...don't intend on letting them plague me forever...
In my last blog or so, i said stuff about how horrible i was doing, how horrible i looked because of stress and how unapproachable i seemed to be getting...well, it was a period in my life, where yeah, i was really fucking depressed about shit...and i was rather unapproachable on many things...but now im better, now im back on my way to being happy...im doing my best to make stuff work, im not gonna make the same mistake twice, im playing it safe this time and im gonna make shit with me and Ashley work if she wants it to...
Love
Justin
Im not with her and i haven't been for a while and yet, it still seems to bite me in my ass when i try to do something that has nothing to do with her...but it's not her fault, nor is it mine, it's just people thinking that they know what's best for others when clearly, they just need to keep their so called knowledge to themselves...
I met this girl...Ashley Brown.
We've been talking for a few weeks now...and everything is pretty damn awsome with her and me. It's really great and great is what i need sometime...cause i keep getting screwed over on everything that has something to do with a relationship. I need a girl that is everything i could think of to put in a girl. A great sense of humor, fun to talk to, a girl that always has something to say that challenges me and makes me laugh and think about my answer a little bit, a girl that is beautiful to me and a girl that will make the relationship just as much fun as i will and i found her...Ashley, is just amazing to me. She's not boring in anyway, our conversations and whatnot, could go on for hours and never be boring or without a laugh. Everything she says to me is the exact thing that needs to be said and in return, i can talk to her way better than i could talk to makayla or any other girl i've been interested in. Im not afraid to say certain things or bring up stuff to talk about for fear of having my head bitten off.
I really, genuinely like Ashley alot, and she knows it.
But people seem to be trying their best to make sure me and her don't work. Telling her that im just talking to her to make makayla mad, or telling her that im just wanting to date her to get back at Makayla for breaking up with me, and among other indescribably stupid things. None of this is true but it makes Ashley think that im not who i act like i am. She has her doubts about how nice i am and how complimentary i tend to be, how crazily i like her and how i can't wait to talk to or see her again. Because of these people saying silly fucking shit, she thinks that im fake and not who i really am. But im slowly making her see that, im not stupid enough to hurt her to get back at makayla, and that im not lying about anything to do with me. Enough people know me, that she could ask anyone about me and they'd tell her everything they know about me and assure her that im exactly who i seem to be.
There's so many things i'd like to say to people who just seem to trail behind me trying to fuck up my life and everything in it but im to nice and mature to worry about them...Making me miserable might make them happy for a little while, but when i prevail and i get what i want and i make it work, they are gonna be just a miserable as i was, or worse, simply because i ruined their plans to ruin me.
I really like Ashley, she makes me happier than i have been in a long fucking while...probably happier than i've been all year. And because of this, im cautious about what i do. I don't want to push it or jump into a relationship to fast, i don't want to ruin me and her...Right now, we're just friends, we're just talking, getting to know each other, im getting to know her mom and wow, her mom is freakin cool, and everything so far, is coming along nicely...In a few weeks, i've broke boundaries that it took me many months to break with Makayla. That doesn't mean anything bad about Makayla it just means, that stuff wasn't easy to work out with me and her and well, with me and Ashley...it's just simple and outstanding. I almost always wear a smile when im talking to her, because i know that everything is great.
Because of people saying stuff...she's under the impression im still in love with Makayla. Yeah, i love makayla, like a friend more or less, i care for her alot...i just can't, NOT care about her....but no, im not in love with her, i don't think i ever was...and i know that me and her aren't ever gonna date again, we aren't ever gonna be more than friends, just because me and her, never made anything work...If makayla wanted to make stuff better with me and her, i'd like to think she would have done it when we were together...and if she is trying to do stuff now, it's just to late for anything like that...but i don't think Makayla would try to fuck me on my happy times...she's not that way about things i believe. People who have no clue about stuff and still talk about it like they do, are just fucking silly bitches and i'll tell them every day i see them.
Life is full of diseases, just ready to tear and rip away at your happiness...and i for one...don't intend on letting them plague me forever...
In my last blog or so, i said stuff about how horrible i was doing, how horrible i looked because of stress and how unapproachable i seemed to be getting...well, it was a period in my life, where yeah, i was really fucking depressed about shit...and i was rather unapproachable on many things...but now im better, now im back on my way to being happy...im doing my best to make stuff work, im not gonna make the same mistake twice, im playing it safe this time and im gonna make shit with me and Ashley work if she wants it to...
Love
Justin