goodbye 2008.
i decided to stay home with my grandma tonight, because chariot flaked on her and didn't come down from boston to spend new years with her.
we're not doing much, but i'm glad i stayed.
carl bought me cpt. morgan and jager, so i still getting wasted.
i feel bad for him because his new years plans fell through, and he's probably at rudy's right now.
but he knows how to make friends quick, so i think he'll be fine.
2008 was a tough year for me, but i've learned and grown a lot.
12 things i've learned about myself:
1. i am a very sensitive person, and i've built a huge emotional barrier to feel safer.
2. i am a very uptight person, and i only let myself go completely during sex.
3. i don't really love carl, because i still don't love myself.
4. i am too scared to be without a boyfriend.
5. my grandmother is shaping me into a better person.
6. i absolutely love to learn.
7. i have an incredibly quick and passionate temper, and i can't control it.
8. i'd rather have one person i depend desperately on for social interaction than keep multiple friends.
9. i do not know how to keep my emotions balanced.
10. i am too scared to do things on my own.
11. i do not have a healthy outlet to let out my frustrations.
12. i FEEL too deeply, and i live on touches and caresses.
12 things i wish/will work for/desire:
1. i want to be physically stronger.
2. i want to figure out how to control my wild temper.
3. i want to travel somewhere new.
4. i want to make new friends.
5. i want to keep henry in my life.
6. i want to go out more and not be such a hermit.
7. i want to stop feeling guilty about doing the things i love.
8. i want to slim back down to 150 lbs.
9. i want to learn as many new languages as i can.
10. i want to keep my good relationship with my grandmother.
11. i want to learn to LET GO OF EVERYTHING.
12. i want to learn how to love myself, flaws and all.
we're not doing much, but i'm glad i stayed.
carl bought me cpt. morgan and jager, so i still getting wasted.
i feel bad for him because his new years plans fell through, and he's probably at rudy's right now.
but he knows how to make friends quick, so i think he'll be fine.
2008 was a tough year for me, but i've learned and grown a lot.
12 things i've learned about myself:
1. i am a very sensitive person, and i've built a huge emotional barrier to feel safer.
2. i am a very uptight person, and i only let myself go completely during sex.
3. i don't really love carl, because i still don't love myself.
4. i am too scared to be without a boyfriend.
5. my grandmother is shaping me into a better person.
6. i absolutely love to learn.
7. i have an incredibly quick and passionate temper, and i can't control it.
8. i'd rather have one person i depend desperately on for social interaction than keep multiple friends.
9. i do not know how to keep my emotions balanced.
10. i am too scared to do things on my own.
11. i do not have a healthy outlet to let out my frustrations.
12. i FEEL too deeply, and i live on touches and caresses.
12 things i wish/will work for/desire:
1. i want to be physically stronger.
2. i want to figure out how to control my wild temper.
3. i want to travel somewhere new.
4. i want to make new friends.
5. i want to keep henry in my life.
6. i want to go out more and not be such a hermit.
7. i want to stop feeling guilty about doing the things i love.
8. i want to slim back down to 150 lbs.
9. i want to learn as many new languages as i can.
10. i want to keep my good relationship with my grandmother.
11. i want to learn to LET GO OF EVERYTHING.
12. i want to learn how to love myself, flaws and all.