Stories and a New Blog
Okay, okay, we know I'm only here because I can't turn down a friend. ;) Especially since said friend is one of the only ones who tried to do Nano this year. So, here I am, in all my livejournal glory.
I finally finished my Scrabble Write for the week, and so here it is. Let me say in further warning that I didn't really get the theme, so if it ( Read more... )
I finally finished my Scrabble Write for the week, and so here it is. Let me say in further warning that I didn't really get the theme, so if it ( Read more... )
You've written a very believable character here-- she's lonely, she's afraid of the sound of the rain, and she at least believes she's somewhat neglected and browbeaten (and she/you make the reader believe it, even after we find the bodies), yet she's clearly mad and clearly capable of great violence.
How long ago did she start killing? From the empty eye-sockets I get the impression that poor Dog went some time ago, but the others seem fairly fresh.
It was a delightfully morbid shock when you just matter-of-factly introduced the bodies, and the real horror here is in the deed already accomplished and the disconnected way your character seems totally unaware of it-- it's effective, and Greg will be lucky if I don't have nightmares tonight!
The hint of more to come, one more victim about to walk unwittingly into that place of death and madness, gave you a really twisted ending and left me as a reader still afraid, in a way. I can just SEE her sitting there among the bodies she doesn't even notice, waiting for Mother...
And your use of of King's parenthetical technique worked beautifully, by the way.
Go read Greg's at http://dunerat.livejournal.com. It's great work and he's apparently less twisted than the three of us...
Reply
Leave a comment