Lets walk away from this hell...

[score1forpants]

I find it quite appalling that the memories which I wish to forget the most are the ones that are deeply engrained into my mind and never cease to cause me pain. Time cannot heal everything; in fact, I don’t believe it can heal much at all. With one single sight, millions of memories can be recalled; some good, mostly all bad, either way, they torture me. My past plays like a damn movie in my mind and I can’t help but cry because I was so stupid, naïve, and dependant. It disgusts me to see that I am so greatly affected by people who don’t deserve even a second of my thoughts. I see myself playing the role I did for so many years at times. I hate being weak. I don’t want to feel alone. These daft thoughts have been whirling through my mind for the past couple of days now. I don’t see why they are. I’ve been in such high spirits lately. Feelings I haven’t felt in years are creeping back and it’s nice. Things seem to be going my way... I can’t see what the big issue is with me. This is all a bunch of garbage... I need to get out of this pensive mood. It’s simply awful and disgraceful that I could possibly be lame enough to think about the past. What’s happened has happened and it’s done with. My lessons have been learned and I need to build a bridge and get over it, yea? Yeah.

I’m going to the mountains for a week. I’ll miss a lot of people. I can’t wait until I get back home and I haven’t even left yet... Ahhhhhh!!! I need a hug.

::::::: My apologies for this entry. I felt the need to vent and as usual, I suck at verbally expressing myself and therefore write my thoughts out. :::::::