Video
[It’s the video, sure. Most folks are used to seeing it here, what with all this bullshit going on at the moment, so why would John’s be any different? But instead of showing his strikingly handsome mug or his enormous, worship-worthy dick, it’s showing a pale blonde kid in baggy clothes, the kind with a fast car and a baby face, a side-ways hat and pants he has to keep tugging up to keep from dropping around his goddamn knees. The kind that makes out with the Jennifer Lopezes of the world. Or, at least, the less famous ones.]
[The kinda named Shitload, and the kind you don't wanna mess with.]
Switch from one Deadworld to another, yo. Ain’t much of an upgrade. Places all smell like processed shit.
[The camera is kicked, showing John with an impassive, bored look on his face, otherwise known as his “BFD” expression.] Thanks. Thought the curtains were a nice touch.
[The blonde kid seems less than enthused; instead, he just starts walking around the small apartment that John’s calling home for the moment.] Thought you could run from us, huh, dawg? Shittin’ in your pants from fear, skeered of us-
--Nah, that was Molly from the burritos. And you have to admit, it was pretty fucking funn-
--But I’d always find you. We'd always find you, fuckin’ snitches. Gonna bust a cap in that ass of yours, and we’ll squat here, too. Save it from you goddamn sacks-a-shit. Can’t hide from us, yo. We got your friend, ‘mber? The look on your face when you guys fuckin’ figured it out, shit was straight up cold. How's he doin', huh? Start fuckin' shit up ye--
[And that’s when the camera clicks off, from either John running at Shitload or running away from Shitload. Either way, from John’s shoe and he scoops that fucker up on his way...to wherever he’s going.]
[The kinda named Shitload, and the kind you don't wanna mess with.]
Switch from one Deadworld to another, yo. Ain’t much of an upgrade. Places all smell like processed shit.
[The camera is kicked, showing John with an impassive, bored look on his face, otherwise known as his “BFD” expression.] Thanks. Thought the curtains were a nice touch.
[The blonde kid seems less than enthused; instead, he just starts walking around the small apartment that John’s calling home for the moment.] Thought you could run from us, huh, dawg? Shittin’ in your pants from fear, skeered of us-
--Nah, that was Molly from the burritos. And you have to admit, it was pretty fucking funn-
--But I’d always find you. We'd always find you, fuckin’ snitches. Gonna bust a cap in that ass of yours, and we’ll squat here, too. Save it from you goddamn sacks-a-shit. Can’t hide from us, yo. We got your friend, ‘mber? The look on your face when you guys fuckin’ figured it out, shit was straight up cold. How's he doin', huh? Start fuckin' shit up ye--
[And that’s when the camera clicks off, from either John running at Shitload or running away from Shitload. Either way, from John’s shoe and he scoops that fucker up on his way...to wherever he’s going.]