Merry Christmas
A friend sent this to me.. Hopefully some people will find this funny: (p.s. anyone want to teach me how to do a cut so I don't clutter your friends list?) Hope everyone has a happy and safe holiday!
If Jesus was born today... and TV News covered it:
[Intro dramatic theme with 'Breaking News' banner]
[F/S Chyron of yearbook photo of Mary]
[Anchor VO] His mother says she's a virgin.......
[SOT up full - insert F/S graphic - longshot of Joseph]
[Anchor VO] His earthly father claims the child is actually the Son of God.
[NAT SOT up full - animals talking]
[Anchor VO]
And his birth made animals SPEAK!
[SOT up full - swooshing sound with quad graphic twist]
[Anchor VO]
Tonight, we've got FULL team coverage of Christ's SHOCKING birth!!!
[MUSIC UP FULL - dramatic theme music]
[ON CAM]
[2-SHOT]
[ANCHOR=TIM]
The prophets predicted his arrival -- and tonight, just maybe, the Messiah is here... Sue?
[Four screen graphic again.] (Why? Because you can...)
[2-SHOT]
[ANCHOR=SUE]
Yes, that's right, Tim. Jayson Smith is live in the desert with shepherds who report an "Angel" spoke to them. Tim?
[2-SHOT][ANCHOR=TIM]
John Ching is live at the palace with a livid King Herrod.
[GRAPHIC: 4 QUAD SPLIT SWOOSH, TWIST FLIP]
Toni Tiparelli is live at the home of a midwife who tells us just how a virgin birth happens...
But we start with Gabrielle Garcia. She is live in Bethlehem with an EXCLUSIVE interview with the innkeeper who rented a stable to the young couple.
Gabby, why wasn't there any room at the Inn.....?
---------------
Continuing our TEAM COVERAGE... Joe Smith is on SPECIAL ASSIGNMENT at the Health Department on the dangers of childbirth in a barn...
Our own Pam Paulini will talk to social workers about teenagers giving birth -- virgin or otherwise!
But first, Channel 6 meteorologist Steve Snell takes us via live doppler radar to the surface of that star shining so brightly tonight....!
SHOCKING allegations about the Wise Man in the middle. Hear what the Little Drummer Boy says happened to HIM!
AND -- do camels carry the West Nile virus? Health reporter Susan Simpson talks to a local farmer.... about keeping your family safe on this -- the holiest of nights.
MANGER DANGER! Stables are filled with filthy straw -- and much, much more. Our undercover team checks it out. Coming up at 6 NEWS AT 11, we'll take a black light to one poor infant's swaddling clothes. Parents, this is a story everyone you MUST see. Protect your children from MANGER DANGER!
Also: There are several brands of Frankincense on the market, but which one gets you the most bang for your buck while still honoring the Son of God? A TV 6 News "Buy it and Try it" tonight at 6.
Plus, folks react to the birth of our Lord and Savior. We'll have Kent Brockman in a live report from the local McDonalds with what people here had to say.
Tomorrow... Mallory Deville will talk to TEAM NEWS Doctor Tim Angstrom about how virgin girls induce lactating to breast feed.
And... TEAM NEWS will show you the 26 signs that your child might be joining a new "fad" cult...
But first... Steinman's back from the Coliseum with results from tonight's chariot races...
If Jesus was born today... and TV News covered it:
[Intro dramatic theme with 'Breaking News' banner]
[F/S Chyron of yearbook photo of Mary]
[Anchor VO] His mother says she's a virgin.......
[SOT up full - insert F/S graphic - longshot of Joseph]
[Anchor VO] His earthly father claims the child is actually the Son of God.
[NAT SOT up full - animals talking]
[Anchor VO]
And his birth made animals SPEAK!
[SOT up full - swooshing sound with quad graphic twist]
[Anchor VO]
Tonight, we've got FULL team coverage of Christ's SHOCKING birth!!!
[MUSIC UP FULL - dramatic theme music]
[ON CAM]
[2-SHOT]
[ANCHOR=TIM]
The prophets predicted his arrival -- and tonight, just maybe, the Messiah is here... Sue?
[Four screen graphic again.] (Why? Because you can...)
[2-SHOT]
[ANCHOR=SUE]
Yes, that's right, Tim. Jayson Smith is live in the desert with shepherds who report an "Angel" spoke to them. Tim?
[2-SHOT][ANCHOR=TIM]
John Ching is live at the palace with a livid King Herrod.
[GRAPHIC: 4 QUAD SPLIT SWOOSH, TWIST FLIP]
Toni Tiparelli is live at the home of a midwife who tells us just how a virgin birth happens...
But we start with Gabrielle Garcia. She is live in Bethlehem with an EXCLUSIVE interview with the innkeeper who rented a stable to the young couple.
Gabby, why wasn't there any room at the Inn.....?
---------------
Continuing our TEAM COVERAGE... Joe Smith is on SPECIAL ASSIGNMENT at the Health Department on the dangers of childbirth in a barn...
Our own Pam Paulini will talk to social workers about teenagers giving birth -- virgin or otherwise!
But first, Channel 6 meteorologist Steve Snell takes us via live doppler radar to the surface of that star shining so brightly tonight....!
SHOCKING allegations about the Wise Man in the middle. Hear what the Little Drummer Boy says happened to HIM!
AND -- do camels carry the West Nile virus? Health reporter Susan Simpson talks to a local farmer.... about keeping your family safe on this -- the holiest of nights.
MANGER DANGER! Stables are filled with filthy straw -- and much, much more. Our undercover team checks it out. Coming up at 6 NEWS AT 11, we'll take a black light to one poor infant's swaddling clothes. Parents, this is a story everyone you MUST see. Protect your children from MANGER DANGER!
Also: There are several brands of Frankincense on the market, but which one gets you the most bang for your buck while still honoring the Son of God? A TV 6 News "Buy it and Try it" tonight at 6.
Plus, folks react to the birth of our Lord and Savior. We'll have Kent Brockman in a live report from the local McDonalds with what people here had to say.
Tomorrow... Mallory Deville will talk to TEAM NEWS Doctor Tim Angstrom about how virgin girls induce lactating to breast feed.
And... TEAM NEWS will show you the 26 signs that your child might be joining a new "fad" cult...
But first... Steinman's back from the Coliseum with results from tonight's chariot races...